How do we make friends?


The most popular persons are those who take the world as it is, who find the least fault. Charles Dudley Warner

There is no doubt that given a choice, there are number of people who we would like to keep a distance from. It is equally true that there would also be a set of people with who we would happily spend hours together and perhaps some of them will remain lifelong friends too. The one distinct difference between the first set of people who we abhor and those with whom we share a great equation with, is often their attitude they display. The former are often grumpy, grouchy and forever complaining whereas the latter are very calm, cool and collected and take life as it comes. Naturally we prefer to interact and communicate with all those who are smiling, cheerful and fun to be with, rather than the whiners and the fault finders.

While it is easy to outline our preferences of people whom we like and dislike, we need to also examine our own personal attitude and behavior.  It would also help us if we can objectively analyze what are standing amongst our friends is and how many friends we have. Do we walk with the air of a man happy with the gifts that life has showered on us or do we constantly berate our fate and curse our luck? How do we react to the minor hiccups that punctuate every human beings life; do we get into a frenzy, do we shirk our responsibilities, do we sulk or do we take it in our stride and move on with the rest of our activities without missing a beat? It is essential that we also be capable of emphasizing with those who are less fortunate than us and not cower before those who are powerful and dominant. Our attitude will determine how we react and this in turn will influence how people see us. A smile, good cheer and positive energy will help us attract a large friend circle.

As we go through life, everyday brings us opportunities to widen our friends circle and expand our networking. This is possible simply because we have to regularly interact with others and communicate continuously. However not all contacts become our friends because we filter them out through our lenses of personal preference, comfort level and positive vibes.  Similarly others too would be filtering from their perspective and so it is possible that we do not connect with some people, more so because they do not allow us to come closer. If we look around we would also notice that some people seem to easily connect with people, seem to have a very wide friend circle and above all seem to be happy no matter what the situation. A closer examination of the style of these popular people would reveal to us the reality that each one of them makes an effort to go and meet people,  they ensure that they never spread any negative vibes, almost all of them are humours and best of all they all are happy themselves.

Remember: “Our attitude toward life determines life’s attitude towards us.” John N. Mitchell

Try this:

  1. Make a list of friends both personal and professional. Find a common thread that binds all these friends. If there is no single thread attempt to find out some commonality in groups of friends. Examine if some of those threads from part of your personality too.
  2. What are the three aspects of your personality that your closest friends make fun off or show their displeasure at. Objectively analyze these traits and honestly ask yourself if you need to change those traits. If you do not have too many friends ask yourself if that is because you are too exacting in your expectations from others or if it is because you do no0t convey the appropriate vibes to others.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

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