If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you’ll never enjoy the sunshine. Morris West
There are a few people who perennial live as if there is a Damocles sword hanging over them. There are others who live a carefree life till they experience an unexpected blip in their life and then they are so wary of life that they live in the constant shadow of an ominous future. Then there are the odd balls who enjoy everything that life offers as long as the status quo is maintained but get paranoid about any hint of a change be it a job change, relocation or even marriage and then they keep their eyes peeled for anything that will justify their fears. Taken together the list of people who have a lurking fear at the back of their minds is quite substantial.
While it is prudent to be vigilant and cautious, living in constant worry simply saps the fun out of life. It is when one steps out of one’s comfort zone that we discover the many joys that life has in store for us. For example we envy another’s hairstyle or dress but won’t dare to try that out. At other times when we are complimented for something we wonder if that is a sarcastic comment or remain unconvinced that the comment was genuine. In effect what happens is that we rarely relish the moment nor do we carry any nostalgic memories of those wonderful moments. Life then is no longer fun filled but turns out to be a chore that has to be mandatorily gone through. Imagine trying to sleep well knowing full well that you have to get up at an odd hour in the morning to catch an early morning flight; that is but a small hint of the type of life one lives when worry is a constant companion
If one has to overcome this fear psychosis it is imperative that one makes a conscious effort to appreciate that most of these anxieties and fears are actually trivial and a daily occurrence in almost every person’s life. Simultaneously one must also try to appreciate the downside of any eventuality and we realize that almost all of it has a very limited downside and nothing actually life threatening is involved. This should give us the comfort that in life most times we need to cross the bridge when we come to it. Once we have this assurance, it become easier for us to look out for those wonderful thrills and pleasures life has to offer us in plenty. Be it the beautiful sunny morning, or a torrent of rain when we least expect it or the pleasure of a sumptuous meal or the receipt of a surprise gift.
Nothing helps one enjoy life as much as treasuring the most trivial things. New parents are constantly looking out for the new born’s smile, gurgle, peaceful angelic sleep and as they grow up they cheer the first words uttered, the first baby steps taken etc. To a casual onlooker this behavior may seem silly and hyped but for the parents it is a high point in their lives. We too need to be like new parents everyday, seeking out the small pleasures be it the aroma of home cooking, the blooming flowers in our garden or the first scribbling of our child on the walls of the house. It is when we try to rationalize every act, ascribe motives for happenings or anticipate eventualities anxiously that we end up seeing demons instead of the angels all around.
Remember: Negativity is an addiction to the bleak shadow that lingers around every human form … you can transfigure negativity by turning it toward the light of your soul John O’Donohue
- If you have never attempted any of these activities because of your negative mindset about it, choose one activity to attempt over the next one year
- Climb a mountain
- Go for a 2 day trek
- Live in a remote village for 3 days without any electricity
- Go deep sea fishing with fishermen
- Volunteer at an old age home / orphanage for 3 day at a stretch
- Make a list of 12/24 positive thoughts/ quote/ sayings. Tape it up on your mirror and read it every day and try to put the learning into practice. Change the quote every month or fortnight depending o the number of quotes you have. Notice the change in you during that period.
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