Archive for November, 2015

33- Open the gates

How often do you wistfully think about the opportunities lost, the golden chance that you missed and rue your inability to be decisive and experience something different? We are largely creatures of habit and so we prefer to trod the beaten path, remain cocooned in our own little world and are apprehensive about exploring beyond. While our heart would want to take a chance our mind would normally override that urge by popping up imaginary risks and cautioning us against any misadventure, least we fail. Our real problem is not failure but the fear that we could be triggering trouble if we fail. We do not want to take the responsibility and so we remain mute spectators to the numerous opportunities that fate packages for us.

The trouble for many is 4 fold. Once a person can come to terms with these 4 limiting factors, the sky is the limit.

Recognizing the opportunity – This is the toughest part of setting yourself free from the confines of your mental and emotional prison. You can identify an opportunity only if you are seeking it. Many of us are afraid to dream, scared to think big, see lurking danger in being different and so just go along with the flow. Those whom we envy, are people who have dared to visualize something special for themselves and by focusing on that goal suddenly found themselves grasping the opportunity that they craved. Go on make a list of 10 things you always wanted to do or possess. Look at that list daily and notice how you suddenly seem to be noticing opportunities to attain that.

Inability to see the risk reward payoffs – The bigger the risk the larger the payoff. Of course conversely, the bigger the fall too. If we keep thinking about the failure, then you will attract it as you are not focusing on the opportunity but trying to insure yourself against failure. Once you can see the goal you have set for yourself, then it becomes easier for you to outline the roadmap to reach there. Without that roadmap, you will go around in circles. The payoff for bigger risks is the price you pay in terms of effort, sacrifices, stress, criticism and loneliness. If you trust yourself to reach the finish line then nothing can stop you and you will get that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. So will you now invest in buying a lottery ticket or taking part in a competition?

Being persistent – Quick results are the bane of those who begin a venture. Just like those who go gyming cannot get to see the result of their efforts within a week, risk takers who dare cannot expect to find success overnight. Persistence is the one quality that will lead to success. Continuous effort with faith in one’s goal and ability and the spirit to weather any storm are guideposts along the highway of success. There are times when you want to give up or question your own wisdom about continuing and yet if the little voice in your heart says don’t give up yet then give it your best shot daily. Look for the little progress to motivate you to keep pecking away like the woodpecker.

Knowing when to change tracks – There is a thin line between persistence and foolhardiness. This is perhaps even tougher to identify than finding one’s goal. It is easy to have lofty goals but very tough to recognize when the goal set is beyond your personal ability. Not all effort gets rewarded in proportion to the effort. Not all plans fructify the way one has envisioned. The ability to accept that the way ahead is not worth persisting with and the daring to cut one’s losses, takes a special sort of courage. It does not mean giving up but merely choosing a better alternative. Notice that when businesses merge, the also ran’s are not caving in to the market leader but merely acknowledging that it is the best time to cash out.

Unless you dare you cannot do; and unless you do you cannot win !

Try these:

Here are a few dares

  • Not accessing your email or mobile or social media for 48 hours
  • Singing a solo song in a foreign language at an office get together
  • Recording yourself mimicking 3 of your office colleagues and showing it to those colleagues
  • Surprising an office colleague with a an expensive gift on his /her birthday

Attempt to make some dramatic changes as under:

  • In your dressing style
  • In your communication style
  • In your personal space at work and home

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog



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You can make a difference for yourself

32- Go on and enjoy the differenceThe average person is never ever happy or satisfied with his/ her own life. The prime reason for this is their boredom with the routine, their inability to comprehend the value of their contribution to the profession they are in and of course due to man’s inherent weakness to compare and get jealous or envious. What is not really apparent is that human beings also do not want to move away from their existing comfort zone even if that is apparently merely providing subsistence. This is because any change would involve a certain amount of pain; be it adapting to a new environment, the uncertainty of the future or the fear of falling from the frying pan into the fire. Ironically, without change growth is not possible and as a result we prefer to remain stunted rather than venture into the unknown. Imagine if all the fears that we now experience had begun in childhood; we would never have learnt to walk for fear of falling, never learnt to write for fear of being untidy, never learnt to cycle or swim for fear of hurt and injury.

So how do we break out of the cycle of worry, anxiety, fear and frustration that many of us find ourselves in?

Tweak our attitude – Start by focusing on what you are blessed with. Move on to thinking about your personal achievements and the appreciation you have received over the years. Now that you have a lot to be grateful for, move your attention to having bigger dreams, setting loftier goals and mapping out a road map to attain your goal. You will now be having larger self belief and a very positive attitude towards the future.

Visualize the possibilities – At various times in our growing up years we would have had varied interests, dreams, hopes and passions. For a variety of reasons we may have let go of many of our dreams and passions to become more pragmatic and make a more logical choice for our future. Yet, there is ample scope to weave in our dreams, hopes, interests into our life and possibly even into our profession. The trick lies in visualizing how we can still pursue our first love and integrate it into what we do. E.g you love football but today you are a software engineer. You can still see yourself playing for decent team on weekends or you could be coaching school kids in the evenings or weekends or you could develop software that could prove useful to aspiring footballers.

Venture out with faith – Perhaps most of you reading this so far, would have already concluded that visualizing possibilities is difficult but believing that it can be executed is impossible. Everything is possible if you are passionate enough to take the risks and attempt it. You will take the risk only when you start believing that you can attain it. The most important step is the first step; starting out with faith and hope. Most of us kill our ideas without even pondering over it. Remember all progress was made by individuals who believed in themselves and set the tone for others to emulate.

Be open to feedback – Listening is the bedrock of learning. Doing is essential but ensuring that you are doing the right things and doing it right is the only way to succeed. It is important therefore to keep ones eyes and ears open to comments, observations, suggestions, caution and encouragement that people around will make. There is wisdom in all these comments; some are constructive suggestions, others critical, some foolish and a few insightful. The wise man will profit from all these feedback if we listen carefully and keep an open mind whilst evaluating the relative merit of the suggestions.

Keep the goal in mind – If you want to make a difference to your life constantly focus on it. If you take your mind of the goal then the change you seek will be painful and the growth you covet excruciatingly painful too. It is like beginning to work out to keep in shape. The muscles will be inflexible, the body too rigid, the breathing very labored, the discipline too demanding. Time and time again one would be hoping to see some miraculous change but alas unless one keeps up with the rigors continuously, the change will never come about. To keep you going one would have to imagine the end result as the goal to be achieved. In the same way if you want to make a difference to your boring, monotonous and insipid life imagine the passionate, interesting and fast paced life first. Now set about doing all that is needed to attain it. If you have to go back to upgrading your education do it; if you have to sacrifice something major just do it; if you have to earn the wrath of well wishers and friends still do it; after all it is your life that you want to change and make a difference,

Try these:

  • List out 1 major change you plan to bring about in each of the following areas of your life; your personality / work / relationships / finances / lifestyle
  • Choose from any one of the following options or add one of your own that you will ensure that you get really skilled in the next 6 months

Chef / Magician / Tour guide / Dog trainer / Maths or Music teacher / Counselor / Writer

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog


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31-Create your Self Portrait anewIt is not what you are but what you make of yourself that will ultimately define you. However, to do that one must be able to visualize what one wants to achieve, constantly work on making changes to one’s self with that vision in mind and proactively work on creating a new self that personifies and brings out the best out of you. This is a tough call partly because instead of redefining ourselves we are largely focused on imitating others, partly because we do not have the self belief that we can change for the better and largely because we are fatalistic and resign to our fate. While a dynamic self portrait is merely symbolic of the immense potential each of us has, it is important to also bear in mind that we cannot photoshop our life, our deeds, our efforts or our achievements. We need to bring out the changes ourselves by sheer passion, persistence and patience.

The following are pointers to key areas of our life that we need to literally touch up so as to enable us to live out a life that is fulfilling and representative of our full potential.

Attitude – Having the right attitude holds the key to any form of progress for every human being. If one can develop an attitude of positivity, optimism and imbibe a never say die spirit then no challenge is insurmountable, no task too menial or any achievement the pinnacle. The right attitude helps inject enthusiasm, creativity and take proactive initiatives that propel us in the right direction and abets progress.

Self Motivation – Without self motivation every good intent remains merely a dream. Most times a good attitude will generate self motivation but we have to work on sustaining it even when progress is slow, obstacles are many, our spirit is flagging and our urge to give up is overwhelming. A self motivated individual would find reasons to pursue passionately and prevail till the goal is attained. A good aid to be self motivated is to visualize the big picture or ultimate goal and to clearly outline the intermediate steps to attain that. Pursuing a passion or linking the goal to a passion would be the perfect way to constantly be self motivated.

Imagination – With a colorful imagination one can visualize the improbable, see beyond the obvious, create dramatically different images and most of all learn to find possibilities all the time. They say opportunities often disguise themselves in the garb of difficulties and it is only the imaginative that can spot them. Imagination also helps one create chances, seize the moment and bounce back from every setback. Without imagination one would see things in mere shades of grey, be confined to the dungeons of monotony and merely survive without embracing the joys of life. Imagination gives wings to a thought, a spring to your step and zeal to your mission.

Self belief – The degree of confidence one has in one’s abilities is a major indicator of self belief. However, self belief goes much beyond mere confidence and is an assimilation of diverse traits like commitment, discretion, daring, risk taking and rationality. Self belief comes from knowledge, upbringing, passion, learning and mental toughness. Self belief must be distinguished from foolhardiness, in as much as the latter is nothing but either over confidence or misplaced self belief.

Effort –Without effort, the self portrait that you will visualize would be just a figment of imagination; an illusion; a dream; a wish; a hope. Effort generates momentum to a pre determined destination and propels thought to be channelized appropriately. All the traits, abilities, learning and mental strength is tested only, when effort is used to mix and mould the product to be showcased. Effort also helps you discover yourself. It helps you understand your strengths and weakness, it makes you aware of your own potential and often helps you discover qualities and traits that you were never aware of.

Spend some time on visualizing your goals. These could be broadly categorized as personal goals, professional goals, self actualization goals. Spend time in understanding your own attitude and reactions to various goals that you have identified e.g. Financial goals might require you to be very self disciplined but your own attitude is to live life king size. Perhaps a diagnosis of your attitude could help you realize your folly and make you aware of the extra discipline needed to meet your financial goals. Find a way to be self motivated so that your quest to attain your goal is not a burden but a personal achievement. Be imaginative enough to discover alternatives that appeal to you and tap into yourself belief that will enable you to keep your eye on your goal and ears closed to the naysayers while continuing your effort and progressing towards your goal.

See yourself evolve into a different person; a more confident and successful individual who dared to change himself/ herself and the world around too !

Try these:

  1. List out 3 things you would like to change in your subordinate / kids and your boss / spouse. How would you go about telling this to them, in a manner that would ensure, that your objective of bringing about the desired change would be effectively implemented by them?
  2. List out 3 people who you interact with often and whose feedback you value. Identify atleast one negative feedback you have received from them in the recent past. Can you work on rectifying the fault pointed out by them?
  3. Which animal / bird best represents your characteristics? Write down 3 – 5 qualities that the animal possesses / displays that closely represents qualities that you posses. Get a picture of the animal and note down these qualities on the picture and place it in a location that will enable you to frequently see it and remind yourself of the traits you posses.

Do not forget that doing all of the above takes EFFORT. No pain no gain !

You cannot photoshop your life but you certainly can leave behind a good impression that does not require any photoshopping.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog


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