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Archive for May, 2016

16- Make moments count

Some of us get frustrated waiting for the right moment, there are others who lament and rue those moments they missed taking advantage of and then there are plenty of us who wonder what the right moment ever is. Each breathe we take, is a moment that is all ours to utilize. Yes even the sleeping hours can be profitably used to dream up new effective plans, provided of course we go to bed with such an objective in mind. In reality, the fact that we go to bed with thoughts of attaining something worthwhile, gives us a clue as to what to do in our waking hours, to pursue that worthwhile goal. However unlike our every breathe that is automatic, capturing the right moment is actually possible only with effort. We need to first work on creating the right moment, and then be aware of the perfect time to make our move and grasp those moments and make it memorable.  So now ask yourself what was the most memorable moment of today?

Picture / visualize what you want. You create moments only when you have a purpose and goal to attain. Without it, we would never be an evolved animal but merely a specie like the rest of the animal kingdom who live merely from meal to meal with evolutionary diversions being a bonus moment in the humdrum of everyday living.  Man/ woman (human race in general) alone is blessed with the privilege to create wonderful moments to experience, share and reminiscence. In daily life, these moments will never be as dramatic as winning a contest or getting an award or breaking some records etc. Yet, we can create and cherish those moments daily by focusing on how we can contribute in our own little way to making the world around us a wee bit better each day.

Here are some things we can do daily to create those magic moments

Spread positivity – Yes there is a lot wrong with the world around. Yet the world has survived many doomsayers prophesies. So seek out the good around, be optimistic, focus on what is going on right. Go around spreading cheer, giving hope, sharing your enthusiasm, injecting a spirit of pride in those we come in contact with daily.

Stand up for your beliefs/ values – Standing up for what we perceive as right or for the values we hold dear is challenging, for there would be many others holding a different and possibly conflicting point of view. It is essential therefore that we are heard aloud, our point of view articulated clearly, our arguments unbiased and rationale and that we are willing to listen to others who may not share our views. We may not come to a definitive conclusion but we certainly won’t be steamrolled or let a brute majoritarian viewpoint be imposed de facto. That would be the moment that you create for the world to see your individuality.

Be there for others – At some stage in life each of us requires help from others. Seek out those who need such support and reach out to them. It could be someone struggling to take a decision, someone who is lonely and scared, it could be someone wanting to share a thought or fear or it could be someone wanting acceptance. Simply being polite, well mannered, being a good listener is all it takes to make those magic moments for others and yourself.

Act decisively to bring change – All of us have complaints. Can we start doing something about our grievances? Start working on finding solutions to our grievances and soon we would be  getting others to join us in the quest of a solution not merely lamenting about our problems. You would create that moment by acting decisively to bring about change rather than joining the chorus of complainants.

Appreciate and encourage – At a more simple and personal level, you can create moments by appreciating others who have achieved something and encouraging those who are yet to fulfill their potential. Appreciation and encouragement are very fulfilling when one does it spontaneously, means it genuinely and gives of it freely. Look out for opportunities to spread such cheer and optimism daily.

Pardon and forgive – If we feel wronged we find it hard to pardon and forgive those who we see as perpetrators of the injustice. As a result, long after the event has passed, we still nurture a grievance, secretly hope to avenge it and want to plot the others downfall or atleast get a vicarious pleasure in their suffering.  Yet it is that moment when we can forgive and pardon that will set us at peace, free us from a mental bondage and create a moment of personal exhilaration.

Accept and let go – Some events will overwhelm us. We cannot turn the clock back and yet we either live in denial or we seek comfort in lamenting ‘if only’. The moment we let go of the crutch of denial or lament, we would make dramatic progress in leading a happier, fulfilling and meaningful life. Accept the mistakes of the past, let it remain in the past, focus on the opportunities ahead and the enormous potential you have to make life even more wonderful. It is that moment you create that will transform you into the person that you really are meant to be.

Try these:

Go to a vantage point like a street level café in a crowded market place or a bustling railway station or bus terminus and simply observe the people passing by. Pay attention to those walking slowly, those lingering, those looking lost and confused, those on the verge of tears. Be grateful for your more well off life and attempt to mitigate the misery of one such person you notice.

Go and visit an elderly friend or relative who is seeking company or visit the sick in the hospital nearby. Perhaps you can  visit a home for the physically/ mentally challenged and create some magic moments for them too.

Maybe you would like to write or speak to someone who you could not pardon or someone who you would like to appreciate. Maybe you can volunteer for a movement about which you are passionate but have not yet committed. Is there a regret that you want to let go off and walk away from. Write it down and then tear it up and trash it.

Learn to create those moments that you will cherish henceforth! Go forth and be blessed with magic moments and timeless memories.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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15- Leave a little sparkle

Most of us go through life feeling that we are just one in a crowd and that no one ever notices us nor values us. Yes it is true that parents would always have a special place for their kids but even that is often liberally sprinkled with do’s and don’ts and an incompleteness that suggests we need to still exceed their expectations.  As a result, we are often trying to match up to expectations, trying to prove a point to others and do not really offer to the world around liberally of our talents, our abilities and our real self. The reality is that our individuality has much to offer that is unique and that is valued by others. It is the little things that we do, that is more significant than the convoluted efforts we make to impress others and gain approval. By being ourselves we are more natural, caring, feeling and expressive.  There is always a lot of sparkle that we leave behind when we are natural not artificial, genuine not put on and when we can freely offer of our self without expectations from others.

Our natural self is often influenced by our upbringing, our family values and the inputs in our formative years in school and social settings. Our own attitudes, beliefs and thinking too have a major bearing on how our personality shapes up. There is a lot of positivity, goodness, care and concern that we are born with but these can be reinforced or negated by influences as we grow up. There is so much that we offer the world around that is valued, appreciated and eagerly sought for without us being conscious about it. So what is it that we can offer spontaneously, amply and freely that will always sparkle up our environment and the people around us?

A smile is obviously the most obvious and easiest sparkle that we can share with others. With a smile we acknowledge another person in a warm way. It is a sure way to state we notice the other person and a way to silently inform that we appreciate their presence. Very often it is also the beginning of a communication and possibly a friendship and a connect. A warm genuine smile brightens up the environment, lightens the mood and livens up the spirit.

Appreciation is something that every individual seeks. It is also something that can be easily given for there is a lot to appreciate in others. We tend to be stingy with our appreciation mainly because we are not aware how effective it is in creating a bond and building up relationships. Appreciation must not be confused with flattery. Appreciation is a genuine expression of a good sentiment towards an other. It can be simply an appreciation of the good work done by someone or your acknowledgment of something good in the other person. The best appreciation is when we respond positively to the individual concerned but we can also be appreciative of the person in a forum or setting where the person is not present.

Empathy is our ability to understand and feel a person’s pain and if possible to act decisively to mitigate it by our actions. Empathy goes a step beyond sympathy in that we don’t merely understand the others pain but we also attempt to walk with the person in discomfort and try to alleviate the pain to the extent possible. We are active participants in the process of healing for the others. This is difficult to spontaneously do because we often tend to hold back our feelings and expect others to ask us for our support.

Encouragement is a simple yet powerful technique that enables one to motivate and support others thereby leaving our little sparkle in their lives. Lots of people constantly need support in their emotional life as well as in coping with the stress of failures. Often they blame themselves for their inability to cope with the challenges they face. As a friend or well wisher or even as a bystander we can perhaps try and take a detached view and offer encouragement to the individual concerned and motivate him/ her to have fresh perspective and try again. With our encouragement we rekindle hope in them and they begin to pursue with greater vigour.

Support comes in many forms. Encouragement is also a form of support. However it is the support that we lend in practical terms like financial support at crucial times, being with them physically when they are in trouble, like when are involved in a calamity, that is really cherished.  One could also support by putting in a word to influencers who can help their cause or just being with them when they are at their lowest depth psychologically and emotionally. Even if we cannot support them directly we must be able to at least guide them to find support or suggest to them alternatives to explore. Even the tiniest of support offered is the little sparkle that you offer them.

Keeping in touch has become easy nowadays because of technology. Yet, it is the personal touch that one craves for. Wishing people or expressing sympathy or forwarding messages through the electronic means has become so easy that it is done with little or no personalization or feeling. The real touch is in our ability to talk, meet, getting together and in giving surprises to those around. This does take both time and effort, but it is the time and effort we invest in keeping in touch that sets us apart from the others. The sparkle that we leave behind is the memories of those wonderful moments when personal touch actually touched the heart. The sparkle of those memories would always be cherished and would always remain priceless.

Try these:

In addition to the above explore how you can leave a sparkle through the following

  • Your manners
  • Your etiquettes
  • Your initiative
  • Your impartiality and fairness
  • Your tone/ language/ conduct
  • Your talents / abilities
  • Your wit/ humor/ presence of mind

 List out the following

  • Names of 2 individuals (other than immediate family) who have deeply influenced you.
  • Recollect 2 wonderful moments from your life where someone played an important part in making it memorable.
  • Can you remember at least 2 incidences where your involvement in some way made a person thrilled and ever grateful for your presence.
  • Are there memories of times when you did not get the appreciation /support or encouragement that you sought from someone? Do you still feel bad about it?
  • Do you remember an embarrassing moment/s when you backed out from offering support / encouragement to someone who placed his/ her faith in you?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »