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Archive for the ‘Hope’ Category

35- 29 Sept 17- Drop the trashOver years we accumulate a lot of knowledge, experiences and wisdom, yet we often ignore the basics. We need to de-clutter out minds, our hearts and cleanse ourselves of toxic emotions. We are forced to de-clutter our mobile phones when the memory is full yet when it comes to ourselves, we are not even aware of the need to adopt a similar approach. Midway through this year is a good time to spruce up our inner self so that we focus on the second half of the year with positive emotions, a forgiving heart and a wondrous attitude of hope.

Here are some pointers on what to drop, so as to de-clutter our life:

Regret – Perhaps one of the most common feelings experienced by everyone at some time or the other. The problem with regret is that we mull over what could have been rather than what we can. The past cannot be changed and yet it seems to unduly influence our thoughts, our actions and our future. We can of course learn from the mistakes we regret but one must not  make it the fulcrum of our future.

Hurt – We are hurt because we allow the feeling to pervade into our psyche. One cannot control the actions or responses of others. Equally importantly we need to recognize that each individual has his/ her own context and emotions which influence their responses.  While it is natural to take offence and feel hurt when actions or responses from others physically or emotionally scar us, the challenge is to get over the hurt quickest and forgive those who have hurt us.

Guilt – Knowingly or unknowingly we are all prone to make mistakes. The mistakes we make consciously e.g. losing our temper or being foul mouthed are more likely to leave us with a deep sense of guilt. At times some mistakes we make are a result of our inability to be strong and resist the forces that we know are wrong but powerful.

Fear – We have both rational fears and irrational fears. Rational fears are more in the nature of preparing for possibilities based on past experience, current facts and a reasonable anticipation of the future. However, most of our fears are imaginary and largely irrational. We fear the future as a catastrophy that can overcome us much and it is largely driven by the fear of superstitious beliefs. The future is rather unpredictable but we can, based on experience and intelligence prepare to face the future with a reasonable degree of confidence.

Anger – This is an emotion that is partly individualistic but largely driven by stress, fear and irrationality. Getting angry at a traffic jam or at a very small child who indulges in some disagreeable behavior is neither healthy for the person getting angry nor is it going to produce any positive outcome. Anger is good emotion when sparingly indulged in, for there could be both meaning and reasonability that produces desired outcome.  Flying off the handle at the slightest pretext is a futile waste of a strong emotion and a serious impediment to developing good relationships.

Shame – We have all gone through some embarrassing moments. However, some happenings could have caused us more pain in terms of embarrassment and consequentially we can never live down the accompanying shame. Failing and repeating a class is often the epitome of embarrassment during school days. Yet, the fact is over time no one really cares or highlights that aspect and instead they focus on how the person has evolved. As an adult in a moment of weakness one could have indulged in some unethical practices or behavior. The stigma will be hard to erase but that does not mean the individual cannot change for the better. While we must never forget our indiscretions, we must not let it be a major scar in the form of shame that overshadows our potential.

See how carefree and energetic you feel once you can de-clutter your life by getting rid of the unwarranted intrusions that subconsciously invade your mind.

Try these

  • What are the three most personally embarrassing situations that you have encountered? What percentage of blame do you allot to yourself for the said situation?
  • Outline three situations that anger you immediately. How often do you encounter it? What is the antidote to cope with your anger?
  • During the past few years which fears have you got over? Which fears still haunt you? How do you propose to confront the fears that still haunt you?
  • Do you regret hurting someone on purpose? When was the last time you forgave someone who wronged you?
  • This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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43-become-a-seed-and-then-growOver the past few posts, you would perhaps have noticed that the theme has generally centered on learning from nature how to grow and evolve. This time we look at how we can dump the past behind and begin anew and the learning comes from the seed; the very heart of all growth. So you have had some bad times, some tough times, you have been pushed into the ground – just like the seed. How did the seed react? It let it come completely undone, allowed its shell to crack and from the ruins of that destruction rose again to flower, grow and bloom.

So what are the lessons for us?

When you have reached the bottom you can only grow up- give yourself a chance. – So as you close the year gone by let your attention be on the gains, the achievements, the opportunities ahead instead of the losses, the failures and regrets. This will give you a goal to focus on, a motivation to plunge ahead and the grit to keep trying till you succeed.

Even when all seems lost – keep faith; have hope.  You would definitely have faced some low and despairing times during the year gone by but the reality is that your survived it.  Perhaps the dirt through which you had been dragged helped you grow stronger, be more resilient and it was your faith in yourself that gave you the hope to wait patiently till the tide turned an d things improved.

You will grow- just ensure you grow young not old – find a rebirth in your thoughts, attitude, behavior.  At some stage the seed would have found an escape when it began to sprout. So the dark and deep abyss in which you find yourself would nourish your whole being provided you do not succumb to fear and negativity. Wait in hope, look forward in anticipation and move ahead with confidence. Align your thoughts attitude and behavior and move grow with self belief and confidence. After all, fortune favors the brave.

Grow strong roots – spread your branches – values and character will enable you to focus on your goals and success- your risk taking ability your daring to chart your own course will enable you to spread your branches. Your upbringing, your schooling, your social circle and those influencing you would play an important role in ensuring you embrace the values and character that will stand you in good stead under all circumstances. Your personal characteristics, your ambition, your hunger for growth and success would determine how wide you spread your branches.  Like the tree that offers good shade, good fruits and provides the best timber you too must grow and contribute to the world around.

Nurture yourself – like good soil, quality fertilizer and bright sunshine that sustains the seed, fill yourself with boundless energy, take affirmative action and enjoy the creative manifestations of your efforts. Growth comes from daring to emerge from the cocoon that you have to break free from. Plan, prepare and pursue your growth for that is when one can nurture the self with purpose and passion. The fruits of your labor would be definitely sweet!

Try these:

  • Write down three quotes / proverbs that you value very much.
  • What are the 3 values or qualities that you admire most in your role model?
  • What is your greatest strength and what would you consider your worst weakness?
  • What is the one criticism that you often seem to hear?
  • What is the one major achievement you would work towards in the coming year?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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28 -Three P formula for the selfThe challenge for each of us, is in enjoying our own company. True there would be family, friends, colleagues and strangers around us for large periods of time but definitely not all the time. We also may like some, dislike others, ignore a few, enjoy the company of quite a few and yet the one person we cannot keep at bay is our own self. Therefore it stands to reason that we better make friends with our own self and keep ourselves happy. We need to accept our successes and failures, our joys and sorrows, our pleasure and pain with equanimity so that we remain in perpetual bliss. This can be best achieved by adhering to 3 principles.

Be pleasant – Nothing like starting the day with a smile and smiling as often as possible during the course of the day to feel happy and to remain pleasant.  Of course there could be unexpected crisis, some arguments and disagreements, irritation and frustration, raised voices and some sarcastic comments to deal with in everyday life. Yet, once a person has learned to find something pleasant to focus on no matter how grave the situation, that individual would always be comfortable with his/ her own self. By remaining pleasant, one also influences the surroundings and the people just like a flower that emits its fragrance at all times. The bees may take away the nectar, the human race may pluck it, the harsh weather may destroy it but it continues to share its fragrance till it gets destroyed.

Be positive – Hope is the beacon that beckons us to attempt the impossible, dare to be different and persist till we succeed. Hope is nothing but a positive outlook no matter what the situation. The fears may not completely vanish; the pain may not subside easily; there could be tears and confusion but you would always quickly regain your composure and deal with issues with poise, calmness and confidence once you master the art of finding something positive in every moment.

Be peaceful – A good sailor never fears the sea but always respects its power. No matter how rough the sea, how forceful the wind, however terrible the weather, the captain and crew know that they have the power to overcome the adversity. They don’t panic, they act decisively, they take precautions and they prepare for all eventualities. This comes from their training, their preparations and their self belief; all of which are directed towards making them master their emotions and remain calm and peaceful even when they face their greatest challenge. Each of us is the captain our ship and the master of our fate. Let us like a good sailor, imbibe the art of remaining peaceful at all times, so that we can steer our life to all the right ports, through the turbulence and challenges of life.

Try these:

  1. Think of the 3 most stressful moments of your life. What caused it? How did you overcome it? Did you get worked up, annoyed and vent your feelings on others? Were you a victim of someone else’s anger and frustration when they were under tremendous stress?
  2. How do you deal with the following types of individual’s?
  • Some who you dislike immensely
  • Someone who is a terrible bore
  • A person who you know will always be having woes and complaints
  • An introvert with whom you have to interact often
  • A person with wild mood swings who is a genius at work.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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2- 10 Jan 16 A note to myselfThe beginning of the year is a an excellent time to write a note to one’s own self as a reminder of how one can pace one’s life by following some key tips. The tips are meant to guide, to inspire, to motivate and to energize one to making this year more inspiring, more productive and most importantly, most fulfilling. These tips condense the wisdom of the ages. They are only illustrative but they are enlightening and pragmatic.

Promise to treasure your time. – Life could be unfair to each one of us except for the one factor that beggar and king, poor or rich, intelligent or stupid, we are all given in equal measure TIME. Lack of time therefore can never ever be an excuse for failure. It is waste of time, inefficient use of time and not valuing time which are the real culprits for our non performance or lack of achievement. Let my focus this year be on making the best use of the precious time gifted to me!

Don’t fall in love with potential.– Look deep and you will find that you are blessed with many talents and enormous potential. The trouble is we tend to envy the potential in others that we do not posses. Worse still is the fact that we do not make any serious attempt to either discover our potential or even if know our potential squander it by our lethargic behavior, our indifferent attitude or by simply waiting for the opportune moment. Potential is like a matchstick in a matchbox; available to light things but latent if never used.

You want something doesn’t mean you deserve it – We make numerous excuses for not realizing our goals or utilizing our potential fully. The excuses largely centre around our lament that we didn’t get the right tools or the right opportunity. The reality is that even a person born with a silver spoon has to cope with his/ her limitations, create the opportunities, expend energies and work hard to make their mark in the world. Wanting something desperately is wishful thinking; working on getting it is the first step to realizing ones goals and utilizing one’s potential to the full.

Be patient but don’t procrastinate. – Waiting for the right moment is the bane of productive action. Inertia often masquerades itself as being patient. Instead of seizing the moment, which is the quality of highly successful people, those who procrastinate in the fond hope of getting the right opportunity find themselves either not starting or getting beaten at the post. Never get into a situation where you suffer from an illness called ‘paralysis by analysis’.

Be hopeful but not naive – Hope is good rock to build a foundation on. However, hope should not be used as a crutch to rationalize personal inertia, getting lured into quick rich schemes, getting duped into by glib talkers and not being decisive enough and cutting losses. When you are naïve, your belief is shallow, your confidence wavering, your dependence on others overwhelming and your judgment very faulty. When you have hope you seek a way out, you create the opportunity and you prepare yourself to grasp the chance for you are sure it is coming sooner than later.

When it is right you will know it. – When in a dilemma making a choice is tough. Yet if you are brought up with the right values, cherish the principles of being an upright person and let your conscience be your guide your choices will never go wrong. You will never feel guilty, you would be emboldened to act decisively and the consequences of your action will never give you sleepless nights. A clear conscience is the best pillow.

You don’t have to force it. – If you are denied something, perhaps it is for the best. If you are bestowed with an unexpected blessing, perhaps you richly deserved it. Whatever the gift, whatever the outcome, whatever be your feelings see it as befitting the moment. It is when we become rigid in our expectations that we try to influence the outcome and then get disturbed when the outcomes belie our expectations. Strive to improve your future but don’t try to shape the future by force.

Try this:

  1. Your friends force you to go with them for a trek. You go very reluctantly since you are not feeling too well and also because you do not like treks. Half way to the trek you twist your ankle. The pain is intense and you are annoyed and frustrated. The majority of your friends ask you sit there while they complete the climb. Two members of the group stay with you while the rest continue the trek. What will you be discussing with those waiting with you.
  2. List out the following
  • Your favorite quote or proverb
  • Your favorite book
  • Your favorite movie
  • Your favorite personality from history

Is there a common thread that binds the above choices? Can you identify that thread?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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27- Not ok so whatUnhappy, disillusioned, confused, hurt, resentful, angry, listless, tired, ignored, unlucky;. Do you experience these emotions / feelings off and on? Do you feel like the only person facing these problems? The reality is that almost every one experiences these intermittently. However, the problem arises when we frequently experience negative emotions, find it difficult to ignore these emotions and worst of all succumb to the pressures of these emotions. Most of these emotions are temporary, largely fleeting and often a byproduct of wild negative thinking. However, it is important that we do go through the feeling of not feeling okay; of being uncomfortable, disturbed and pained. When we experience a situation that disturbs our peace of mind it is essential that we accept it as a painful reality. What is not acceptable is denying it, questioning it, constantly whining over it and making it control our life. When one can make peace with the painful reality, one can appreciate the fact that such not okay feelings actually accentuate the value of the positive emotions and feelings that we are blessed with.

The challenge is to experience being not okay and managing to get back to the okay state. It is like knowing how much one can stretch a rubber band. Stretch it beyond a point and it will snap. Like that broken rubber band, if one lets the not okay feeling to overpower one’s emotions, one becomes irrational, broken in spirit and body and then surrender to mediocrity, mere sustenance and survival. Being not okay implies that we are made aware of our imperfections and limitations. It also keeps us grounded to the reality that not all our efforts can give us the fruits we desire. It also spurs us to make adjustments, re-evaluate our original plans and make a fresh start. However, the danger is that when we are not okay, at times we get demoralized, disheartened and dispirited. There is then a possibility of us giving up and not making any effort to get back on track. History teaches us that even the most successful people have always encountered challenges and it is their self belief and determination that have made them rise up again and climb the pedestal of success.

Here are 6 guiding principles to navigate the not okay state and come back to the okay state.

  1. The past cannot be changed but the lessons it provides are to be learnt well.
  2. The future exists for us to utilize it wisely without having the hangover of the past.
  3. The present is where life happens and we better not waste it brooding over the past or ring fencing the future.
  4. Learn to appreciate and value the good in every adverse situation.
  5. Be prepared to face the unexpected no matter how well you have planned for the future.
  6. Today offers you 24 hours to utilize all the lessons learned, to attain your goals; don’t squander it away.

Try these:

  • Suppose you were mistakenly locked up in prison for a crime you didn’t commit but there is no possibility of immediate release and a long term prison term of 5 years at least what would you do ?
  • You have committed a terrible mistake which you managed to cover up well. However an innocent member of your team was blamed and he/ she was sacked unceremoniously. You have always regretted your silence in the matter. 6years later you come face to face with the unfortunate victim of your misdeed. What would you do?
  • Can you recall 3 incidences / episodes / happenings / events in your life that really disturbed you when experienced it. How did you cope with each such situation? Do those events still play on your mind?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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I am

Self-affirmation is one of the most well know techniques suggested for people to chase their dreams, work towards their aspirations and embrace success. The key to self-affirmation is positive inputs being constantly imbibed. Positive inputs can be imbibed only when one constantly focuses on all the immense possibilities that are around us, when we are aware of our varied personal strengths and visualize the happiness and success that we aspire for. Today’s post is an excellent way to harness the power of self-affirmation and succeed beyond our wildest dreams.

To help you get going here are some positive words, adjectives, statements that can stimulate your thoughts and enable you to harness the opportunities that abound when you fill in the blanks after the words I am

Unique – Yes each of us has an identity as unique as our fingerprint. This is a key strength that differentiates us from those around including our peers, family members and competitors. Be aware of your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual uniqueness. Recognize your unique strengths be it your values, attitude, spirit, courage, thinking, creativity etc.

Just me – this sounds philosophical but in reality is just a way of saying ‘ I am also aware of my limitations but I accept it’. No one is perfect and that means I too need to be identify my personal limitations and work around them. I will not be apologetic about my limitations nor would I be ashamed of it; in fact once I get to know my limitations I would be empowered to shield myself from those self-limiting flaws.

Focused on my goals – the goal gives me a sense of direction and a purpose to strive for. The focus will be sharper as the goal gets crystalized. The next time you go bird watching or go on a wild life safari, notice how you fiddle with the binoculars till you get the focus right on the object that you want a clearer view off. So get a clear idea of your goal and you will map your blue print of how to attain the goal with ease. Traversing the path to the goal will be much smoother too.

Going to succeed – Be it Marco Polo or Christopher Columbus or Vasco da Gama each of them left their shores with the single minded purpose of discovering yonder shores.  Their ships were rudimentary, their crew in all probability a wild bunch on an adventure and the dangers of nature’s fury alarming; yet they left in hope, had faith in themselves and were determined to succeed. They may have failed in their original mission but they certainly didn’t fail themselves!

So isn’t it time you decided to fill in the blanks after the words I am _ _ _ _

Try this

  1. Fill in positive adjectives/ words / statements after the words I am. (write at least 10 complete sentences.)
  2. Identify 5 personal weakness by filling in the blanks with negative adjectives/ words/ sentences after the words I am. E.g. I am lazy / I am not keen on a 9-5 job / I am short tempered). Now work out a plan of action to overcome these weakness.
  3. Identify a role model amongst
  • Your family members
  • Your friends
  • Your classmates
  • Your colleagues
  • Your superiors (including teachers)
  • A personality from history whom you admire
  • Now enumerate 5 qualities that endear them to you and 2 weakness that you notice/ are aware of that these role models had.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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13-30-Life has choices...what is yoursThe toughest part of life is taking decisions. Unfortunately all our life we will be constantly facing this dilemma because almost all the time we are blessed with choices and we have to decide what to choose. Remember the battle with the alarm every morning when it is time to wake up? Confused about what to have for breakfast / what to wear etc.? On hindsight, each one of them is a minor decision as compared to the major decisions you have to make regarding your career, your future, your savings, your life partner etc. Yet there is one decision that you need to make that would determine how you are perceived by the world at large and one that will decide your fundamental happiness; the decision to be yourself.

Being yourself seems to be the easiest thing to do but in reality it is very tough because

You seek acceptance of all what you do or say

You would ideally like to project a picture perfect picture of yourself

You would like to have an impact or influence on the people and the world around.

However it is possible to find greater acceptance of the person you are, project yourself in more favorable light and leave your footprints on the sands of time. What you need to do is groom yourself right, develop the right social skills and values systems, iron out your weaknesses and then when you project yourself it is a well rounded personality that comes to the fore.

Here are a couple of things that one must focus upon so as to comfortably be yourself and find acceptance by many and also touch many lives.

1. Cultivate good manners

2. Enhance your vocabulary and communication skills

3. Be truthful

4. Groom yourself well / dress appropriately

5. Learn to appreciate and compliment

6. Develop empathy

7. Control your temper

8. Keep calm no matter what the crisis

9. Be respectful no matter what the provocation

10. SMILE

Try this:

  • How would you want people to describe you after they have frequently interacted with you?
  • Name three people other than your family members who have had a profound impact on you?
  • If you were to be marooned on an island which person personally known to you would you prefer to be your companion on that island.
  • What is the one most endearing quality you seek in a person who you consider your friend.
  • If in a sudden crisis who is the person you would reach out to first ?
  • Your best friend is in serious trouble with the law. You are aware that he is guilty. How and what and when would you communicate with him/ her?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

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