Category: Opportunity

Expectations are a gift not a burden

Expectations are a gift not a burden

It takes a really different perspective, to understand and appreciate, how an expectation becomes a gift and that it is not a burden. Remember the festival times and birthdays, when each of us had some sort of expectations regarding the gifts, we believed we would get. Perhaps in some cases, the expectations still persists, except that the giver of the gift has changed, possibly to that of a spouse, grownup children, a new friend, the in laws etc. On the other hand, do you as an individual, get bogged down by the challenge of fulfilling expectations? It could be as simple as what gift or give someone or it could be more complex as, how do I fulfill the other person’s expectations of me when I myself am not motivated or confident of giving something appropriate?

To understand and appreciate the perspective of expectation being a gift, one needs to appreciate that expectations are always put only on those we have trust in; have faith in; people who we are sure love us a lot and believe in doing the best for us. Expectations arise because we place out trust in someone and that trust is earned because they have given ample evidence of their nature and love for us. It is true that many a time we have been disappointed when our expectations did not match up to what we had in mind. Other times, the expectations remained unfulfilled for a variety of reasons but while the pain of that moment may still be a little sore, we have still largely kept up our expectations in them again. Our expectations are proof of our understanding, appreciation, trust and value we place in the relationship.

If you are someone burdened with the onus of fulfilling expectations, look at those expectations as a testimony to other people looking up to you. This kind of trust is earned over time and reinforces the reality that you have are a person who people look up to, trust whole heartedly and believe. They have expectations from you because in their experience, what you offer in word, deed and gifts are valuable, chosen with care and apt. You have over time given others reason to believe in you. You have listened to them, you have kept them in your thoughts, you have the courage of conviction to give a feedback and you value the relationship with them.

Look at yourself as the Santa Claus that brings good cheer in all ways, at all times to many a people and thereby you have earned trust, respect and the challenge of fulfilling myriad expectations however big or small.

Try these:         

  • Ask yourself if there are people whose email forwards or watts app forwards are looked forward to by you? Can you identify the reasons for it? Is it because they forward you selective, meaningful, apt stuff that you can identify with?
  • Next challenge is for you to be as discreet, selective and discerning in your communications as the person whose communication you value.
  • Who disappointed you the most because he/ she/ they never came even close to fulfilling your expectations from them?  Have you also let down others in a similar way, when they had high expectations from you? What is common to both situations?
  • What was the most wonderful gift you ever received? Ask yourself why the value of that gift is priceless for you?
  • What is the best gift that you have gifted to anyone? What makes you think it is an excellent gift?
  • Is there any gift or surprise that you received that was completely unexpected and thrilling?
  • What was the gift you disliked or disapproved of and rankles you even today? Can you identify the reasons for this feeling of dislike?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Self motivation – the key to success

Self motivation – the key to success

Motivation, like air, is something invisible yet omnipresent. Unlike air which we breathe automatically as long as one is alive, one has to strive to identify and embrace motivation. While there could be various types of external stimulus that could pave the way for motivation, genuine motivation comes from within. Intrinsic motivation, as it is known, is intense, long lasting and fuels commitment. Unfortunately, intrinsic motivation is extremely hard to identify. On the flip side, if one were to identify one’s intrinsic motivation, life would be much more enjoyable, work more passionately and success would follow seamlessly. The trick to a great life is finding that motivation, which spurs you to remain excited every moment of your life.

Here are some pointers to discovering / identifying your intrinsic motivation:

Look out for something that you like /appreciate: The moment you start liking and appreciating things, you will always see things in a positive, enjoyable, engaging light. Similarly, try to seek out the good in whatever you do. It is this wondrous approach to life, work and social requirements that gives you a natural ability to be charged up and excited all the time. E.g. Your job is not too taxing / your boss is tough but fair/ you have friendly colleagues / your family is most fun to be with / you have family routines that are unique etc.

Ask yourself What is unique/ exciting about this? At times, the drudgery, the routine, the boring aspects of one’s life and job gets us mentally bogged down. You will find it hard to be motivated. That is the time you will have to take a re-look at whatever you do and see if from a prism of optimism and possibilities. The small thrills of the job, the interesting outcomes despite the routine, the appreciation from others for doing your routine job well etc. are all triggers to remain self motivated. E.g. You are sought after by colleagues because you are able to organize fun events / You can make a routine circular about a picnic much more fun filled / you get to meet interesting people as part of your job / you get to learn / gain expertise in technical aspects of your job

Ask yourself ‘How will I make a unique contribution to this?’ Ask yourself if you can make your job and your life even more easy, exciting, different, fun filled etc. Initially it would be hard to see such possibilities but once you look for such possibilities, you will find that there are surprises awaiting discovery. E.g. How can I speed up the job/  Are there ways to have checks and balances to minimize errors in the job/ can I introduce automation or get a software developed to manage things better.

Ask yourself ‘ How can I add fun to this?’ Any job can be made fun provided you believe it can be fun. Even the most routine and boring tasks can be made exciting by a little creativity, a bit of daring and the willingness to believe in yourself. E.g. I have heard of a telephone operator who had a penchant for sketching draw up a sketch of frequent callers, who she never met, purely based on their voice. Her sketches, I am told a remarkable accuracy to the facial features of the subjects. Similarly, I was in a flight in which the boring pre departure in-flight announcement of wearing seat belts was made in the most hilarious manner by a flight attendant. Everyone paid attention, they were engaged and most importantly the message was delivered effectively.

Be grateful for the opportunities that you get. The art of being grateful makes us more tuned in to our inner self. We become aware of all the blessings we are endowed with. As a result we begin to value all we have with a greater sense of responsibility. This sense of responsibility automatically triggers motivation within us, because you now know that you have to keep doing what you go to do because it is a blessing denied to many. E.g. You get a promotion. Almost immediately you  realize that your commitment must be much more, your skill sets need to be finely honed and you are motivated to take on the challenge albeit even when it includes longer hours and even more challenges.

Try these:

  • What is your next target in your personal and professional life? Write it down and commit to it. Notice the motivation that spurts up once you write it down and commit to it.
  • Recall the most appreciative feedback you have received in your life. Does the recollection of these moments excite you and energize you?
  • What do you think motivates a lift man/ your house help / the delivery boy who delivers to your home/ the waiter who serves you? Do you remember any one of these people who you have interacted with? What was the special characteristics that she/ he displayed, that makes you recall the person?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Discovering the fountain within you

Discovering the fountain within you

The empty bucket that we walk around with, can be labeled many things. Excuses are the most common label. Then there are others like bad luck, not good enough, it is very tough, it is not possible for me, there is no one to help me etc. The sad part is that these empty buckets remain empty while ironically, there is within you the fountain of limitless opportunities and potential waiting to be tapped into. The question is how can one identify this fountain and how can one drink deep from this fountain. Surprisingly the question is not too difficult to answer. However, one must be ready to make an effort to find the answer and to then make double that effort to reach into the fountain within you and utilize it well.

Do a personal SWOT – Do an objective evaluation of your personal strengths, weakness, opportunities that you see being available to you and the potential threats or difficulties that can derail your success. If required pay attention to feedback from people who matter, ask mentors or elders who can give you an objective analysis. It is a self diagnosis that can help one pursue the right medicine for personal improvement and development. Surprisingly you will find that all that is required for your well being and happiness in well within you. You will discover new strengths and opportunities and you will also note that the antidote for many of your weakness and imaginary threats are also within you. All you need to do is delve in and find it.

Identify your interests/ passion – This could be in the nature of your non academic interests as well as those subjects that you are good at and also have a passion for. However, while interest could be varied, your passion is what you deeply care about and are willing to sacrifice a lot so as to pursue it. Imagine you being passionate about music but you are unable to pick up musical notes. While your interest and passion are commendable you will have to find innovative ways to ensure you can live your passion fruitfully.  Once again delve in and discover your creativity, your inner strength, undiscovered talents and re-engineer your life with these.

Outline your short term/ medium term / long term goals – These goals must be done for varied aspects of your life. You will then realize that you are already blessed with much and with diligent, focused persistence you can dig deep into the enormous potential that you have which lies untapped. Within you lies the balance that will ensure you limit your desires, be lavish with your gifting and tap into unlimited joy. Your goals are then reduced to being happy and making the world around you happier.

Move out of your comfort zone – For the vast majority, an unwillingness to step out of their comfort zone has made them look at their potential and the opportunities possible like a frog stuck in a well. When you move out of your comfort zone, you will definitely feel a little helpless and concerned but soon you will also discover that the world has much more to offer provided you are willing to take your chances. The fountain within you will gush out when you risk more, discover more and experiment more.

Try these:

Write down answers to the following questions?

  1. Who is the happiest person you have ever met? List three qualities that the person exhibited that justified your belief.
  2. What is the biggest loss you ever suffered? How long did it take to get over it?
  3. What is the one desire you still crave for? What will happen if you do not get your desire?
  4. What was the most embarrassing/ awkward moment of your life? Do you still feel terrible about it?
  5. What is your greatest weakness from among these three; anger/ jealousy / pride. How has it impacted your life?
  6. Name the three greatest blessings you have received. What is the one blessing you wished you got?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Live your dreams

Live your dreams

Parental direction, supervision by teachers and society expectations are the influences with which most of us are brought up with. As a result, the conditioning of individuals is largely focused on pleasing the expectations of these diverse set of influencers. Net result is that we surrender our individuality, create an artificial being who is meeting expectations of others but is often deeply dissatisfied within. To break out of this circle is tough because it would mean charting one’s own course with little hope of support and the possibility of not fully attaining the dreams one has. Yet the fact that we have just one life and it is better to make it ‘my own life’ rather than ‘trying to fit into someone else’s view of life’ should be incentive enough to break out and furrow one’s own path.

Dream it – The path to your personal glory begins when you can dream about what is the glory you seek for yourself. The dream need to be grandiose, it can be off beat, it must be something that ignites enthusiasm in you and above all it must be clearly visible in your inward eye. You want to be the top honcho; go for it. You want to play for your country; nothing can stop you except you. You just want to be a happy contented person; seek ways and means to realize that dream. Just ensure it is your personal dream not something you are doing to make someone else happy. The size of your dream does not matter. The quality of your dream determines how you go about attaining it.

Develop it – If the dream is clear, it is time to wake up and get about the business of achieving it. It all begins with planning. Create a blue print; develop a road map; outline the milestones. No dream is realized by pure luck. You want to win a lottery; first step is to invest in the ticket. So everything begins with having a goal, charting out the steps to realizing it, in built the strategy to overcome hurdles, be mentally prepared for a long haul and then start.

Do it – The key to shaping the world the way you want it is by beginning in earnest, continuing with passion and striving for excellence. It is possible that along the way there would be hiccups, obstacles, demotivation and frustration. Yet if the goal is clear the patch well chalked out and your confidence and self belief intact, you will ride the momentum built by your passion to reach the destination. However, action is a long drawn out and often a lonely journey. At times it makes you revisit your own decision. Other times you get energized by the thought of achieving what you have dreamt of. Many a time you will be criticized, condemned, ridiculed and roughly sidelined. That is when your intense desire to leave your own unique mark in the world will be the only thing that will fuel your spirit to create, conquer and rule your own destiny.

Try these:

  1. Try living for a month on one third your normal monthly expense.
  2. Give 4 hours of your time weekly to any social cause. Be part of a social organization or do something tangible for a cause you believe in.
  3. Work on overcoming one bad habit you know is limiting your effectiveness.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Prove it to yourself

Prove it to yourself

For most people frustration creeps in when one feels unappreciated, unrecognized and  unknown despite us doing what we think is an awesome job. The real problem unfortunately is that out thinking is flawed. While the ego would want to be noticed, recognized and appreciated, what one fails to put in perspective is that one must learn to enjoy and take pride in what one does. This can happen if we constantly exceed our own expectations. Once you prove your abilities and potential to yourself, your personal gratification of a job well done, would not need you to seek out third part confirmation.

Here are 5 ways to prove yourself to yourself:

Take on a challenge – Almost every moment we are challenged to focus on our goals, prepare for eventualities, fight boredom and laziness etc. That apart there could be bigger challenges that come either out of a work situation or because of a personal crisis or because someone has set you a task and challenged you to take the dare. Every one of these challenges is an opportunity for you to prove yourself to yourself because that is how you get things accomplished which you otherwise would have found tough to do.

Pursue a dream – It is possible that at various times you had fanciful ideas and dreams or wishes. Due to pragmatic considerations it is possible you let those dreams remain and focused on a way to make a living and life that would give you economic freedom, respect and domestic bliss. Yet the craving to achieve a dream perhaps still remains. It could be something very personal like learning a new language or mastering a musical instrument or it could be something off beat like trying to moonlight as a comedian or a writer or an actor. Whatever your unfulfilled dream, bring it to the fore and give it your best shot.

Move out of your comfort zone – By habit we try to stick to the tried and tested. Occasionally one may experiment with fashion or food but when it comes to attempting something that requires a long term commitment or that has a serious element of risk but with an equally tantalizing prospect of reward we err on the side of caution. We simply let those opportunities pass by.  Perhaps you get a tempting offer to change your passion into a profession but with the challenge of having to sacrifice your current stable occupation; ask yourself what your next move will be. By moving out of your comfort zone even in matters like pursuing your dream or taking on a challenge you prove yourself to be someone with courage, daring and confidence. That is the stepping stone to taking bigger risks of moving out of your comfort zone perhaps by moving location, maybe changing jobs, perhaps starting your own venture etc.

Stop cribbing / complaining – One common factor that binds most of us is complaining about what should be right. We also take pleasure in pontificating about what ought to be done, what is not being done and how one would have done it; alas very few of us walk the talk. We criticize our housing societies, the municipal corporation, the state government, the national government but do not get involved in any action plans initiated by any of these agencies. We have our own rationale and excuse for indulging in the very matters we crib about. A classic case is bribing authorities to get work done which is what be complain and crib about regularly. If you simply stop complaining and whining that would be a major step in proving to yourself that you will not let the problems around demotivate or stress you out. If you can go the next mile by proactively getting involved in a social cause that you yearn to bring a change in that will be a humongous proof that you can do what it takes to be your own person irrespective of the challenge/ pain / sacrifice that involves.

Be the change – The best way to prove yourself to yourself is to be the change you want to see around you. It could be simple matters like sticking to your commitments, adhering to the time schedule or it could be by being bolder and  standing up for what you believe is right, opposing what you serious differ with and being willing to stick your neck out for those who are wronged. You may have to confront the critics, perhaps alienate your friends who differ with your views, be in a minority because of your views but by being the change you want to see, you will see yourself proving your own independence, taking pride in your sense of responsibility and seeing yourself making a difference to the world around you.

Try these:

Try an explore the following opportunities to prove you have it in you to make a difference

  • Join an NGO and volunteer there.
  • Explore a strength that you posses that you have never utilized effectively e.g. taking tuition’s in maths or taking a sports coaching in a discipline in which you are/ have been strong or if you are good musician but never been part of a band try to join a band.
  • Write a letter to a newspaper or create a short video about something that you feel strongly about. E.g. stray animals / misuse of social media /

Click on the following links and see people who proved that they can make a difference without applause, recognition and fame.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

If it excites and scares you…

If it excites and scares you…

Like many, I am full of ideas. I get excited at the thought of executing some of my ideas but most times I avoid attempting anything because I am scared that I may fail. When I travel to new destinations I am captivated by the sights be it the mountains, the rivers, the sea or simply the ambiance of the fun, food and locale. Again I am tempted to indulge but often hold back for I am afraid of something going wrong. Far too often we attempt something different because we are left with no choice. It is also possible that we discovered that there is something new, invigorating and exciting about the new things we attempted. The question we need to answer then is ‘ why don’t I proactively try out something new, different, exciting and scary?’

We are lazy – The easiest thing to generate is ideas. The tough part is executing them. So we lie back and think of various possibilities, scenarios, opportunities. However, if we want to make something out of those ideas we need to get up and work towards it. Sheer laziness, casualness and lethargy on our part makes us dreamers not doers. Laziness manifests itself in the most common way called procrastination.  If one can stop making excuses for not doing something one is passionate about, then one can strive and realize one’s passion and dreams.

We create self doubts – One key reason for procrastination is the self doubts we create in our minds. We question our abilities, we see the challenge as overwhelming, we try to find short cuts rather than hit the road running, we try to plug every loop hole that we imagine in our plans etc. Notice that each of these is self created and a convenient way to fool our mind into thinking that we are being prudent, careful and thorough in our approach. Every doubt is just a self created hurdle that delays our start and often leads to inaction.

We are risk averse – An extreme case of self doubt is rationalizing is that we are risk averse. Risk exists every moment of our life. The degree of risk could vary but the reality is that it exists. Yet we place a premium on certain types of risks which is logical because some risks are higher when the nature of the business on hand itself is fraught with risks. The risk trouble doubles when we imagine all sorts of risks plaguing us especially when one is kickstarting something new. It is technically impossible to over all our bases and yet that is precisely what we try to do when we have to plunge into a new activity. The risk of failure is perhaps the biggest risk we fear.

We fear failure – Among the risks we fear, the fear of failure is what haunts us. A simple example is the numerous people who do not attempt public speaking simply because of their fear of failing. Failure they say is the stepping stone to success but apparently no one wants to use stepping stones. Everyone was to jet set to success and that is technically a near impossibility. Success is earned, learned and sustained over time. Many a time failure is nothing but our inability to keep going and giving up on the cusp of redemption. Occasionally failure is our short sightedness in not responding to change but most times failure is imagination taking us on a ride to nowhere.

We limit ourselves by limiting our thinking. – Perhaps the biggest stumbling block to progress for many, is our self limiting thinking. We begin to aim high and then lower the barrel ending up shooting ourselves in the foot. We question our abilities, show poor trust in our judgment, do not dare to leap frog and keep looking over our shoulder instead of seeing the distant horizons. There are opportunities aplenty, there are challenges that we can overcome easily, there is life beyond the ordinary if only we dare to dream big, think differently and  act decisively.

It is time to TRY what EXCITES you and SCARES you… NOW

Try these:

If you could change your profession or life list out the three alternatives you are most passionate about. How about doing yourself a favor and working on pursuing one of the passions within the next one year.

If you won a million rupees in the lottery what will you do with it? Outline a plan. Share it with a friend and see his/ her reactions ( do not tell them that it is an imaginary exercise you are attempting).

List out the three craziest things you have done in life so far. What was the outcome? What lessons did you learn from it?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Start or start again

18- 04 - 02 Feb 18-Be ready to start againJanuary has passed by and perhaps some of us are left wondering why we missed the opportunity to do something different, something we are passionate about but something we are afraid to dare. It is possible that in the past we have not met with success when attempting something new. It is possible that it was difficult to cope with the criticism from others or that one ran out of enthusiasm when things got tough. Worse of all we may have miserably failed and fear attempting it again. Failure teaches one valuable lessons; the idea was not thought through well, it was perhaps badly executed, maybe you did not factor in some critical limitations you had, your idea was well before its time etc. Failure also tells you one more message; it is not the end, you can succeed a second time if you attempt, success that eluded is never permanent but more importantly failure is never fatal.

Very often it is not fear of failure that prevents us from starting again. It is often our tendency to procrastinate. This aided and abetted by our lack of motivation, lethargy, our reluctance to take chances and worse of all fear of criticism. However, look at starting / starting again from a different perspective and you will realize that there is no better time to begin than now.

It is an opportunity to prove yourself- Everyone is waiting for glory days. It can happen only once you begin. So it does not matter if you have failed before because it is the next time your start again that gives you the opportunity to prove yourself. Success is rarely a flash in the pan. It is the outcome of persistence, patience and passion. Improvement holds the key to success. You may have to work, rework and remodel your work till you achieve what you set out to do. Just do it.

It is a chance to give wings to your passion – It is possible that you are doing something that keeps your body and soul together or that sustains you. You do it largely out of compulsion to make a living. You will have to pick up courage to change your life by chasing your passion. You may have to rough it out, you may stumble and fall, you may face a bleak desolate lonely time. You could fail multiple times. Yet it is only when you start again with hope, faith and focus that you can get the winds of hard work and good luck give your wings the power to fulfill your passion.

It will test your skills, your spirit and your strengths – When you start again, it means you are hoping do something better than what you ever did. It is also a time for you to realize your true potential, bring to the fore your zeal and enthusiasm and to test the depths of your resilience, passion and patience. You will discover a different individual within you; a person far superior to the being you thought you are.

It will change, uplift and embolden you – When you make up your mind to try again, to not give up and to succeed it a true metamorphosis of your personality.  It changes your perspective of life, it will uplift your spirit to new heights and it will embolden you to dare to conquer. Your attitude, your mannerisms, your body language and your achievements will all reflect confidence, urgency, passion and success. Just try again and change your life.

Try these:

  1. Outline three critical changes you would like to bring about in your life. List out the excuses you have been giving for not bringing about these changes. Find an antidote to each excuse and begin the change NOW.
  2. What are your pet peeves or fears. Find a way to confront them and overcome them. try,Try, TRy, TRY.
  3. Your challenge this week is to attempt the following
  • Give yourself a major makeover –e.g. change in hairstyle / clothes / communication style / body language
  • Talk to at least 3 strangers for 5 minutes each at least
  • Do something you have never done before – e.g. cook / eat a vegan meal, draw a portrait of yourself, record a song in your voice, watch a movie in a foreign language, visit a cemetery at night, start writing a blog/ diary

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

My vision for the New Year

18- 01 - 01 Jan 18 -Your visionA New Year; a new perspective for the year is the aim of this post. Rephrased – it is MY New Year and therefore it is MY Vision for the year that I will lay out.

It is obvious that each person reading this post will have to identify and enumerate his/ her own vision for the year.  What is common though, is the following reality that is applicable to each individual :

You need to see your vision –  This is perhaps the toughest aspect of the  process of visioning. It requires that the individual spend time thinking about what he/ she wants from life, the goals to be set, the process of attaining the goals, the dreams and aspirations one has, seeing a larger picture of the personal future that one hopes to attain. The process is constantly evolving through out one’s life time. What is critical is the individual being able to regularly nourish the dreams/ vision with hope, faith, effort and passion.

You need to trust your vision – The trouble with visioning is that we start questioning ourselves and our abilities to attain what we deeply cherish. If the individual cannot trust his dreams, it will be extremely difficult for him/ her to convince others, to personally put in the best and to work with passion towards the vision. The biggest problem comes from naysayers, critics, well meaning but vision-less family, friends and mentors. Your vision is something you have set for yourself and so it is almost impossible for others to appreciate and understand its significance for you. When the vision is clear, the passion strong and the effort ceaseless, nothing can stop you from attaining your vision.

You need to work for your vision – You and you alone have to take responsibility for realizing your vision. You cannot blame circumstances, fate, detractors for your failure to realize your dreams. Hard work, smart work and focused effort will be the bed rock on which any vision gets realized. No one but you can do it. Of course, one needs to evolve the vision to suit the times. One needs to be pragmatic yet optimistic, passionate without being obstinate, learn to adopt and adapt current trends and plan with purpose and execute with diligence.

Try these:

  1. Just list out 5 goals you seek to achieve in the next six months. Ensure you have an inbuilt measure to determine your progress each month.
  2. Write down what you will do with a one million ( ten lakhs) rupees lottery that you win?
  3. Outline your vision with respect to the following
  • Increasing your knowledge
  • Enhancing your financial well being
  • Contributing to social causes
  • Making your family life even more fun filled

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Keep up the good work

40- keep up the good work

We are nearing the end of this calendar year. This is a time when there is a tendency to look back and wonder how well the year gone by has been.  For many people there is a tinge of regret that one has not made the best of the time we were bestowed. We lament the missed opportunities, the strained relationships and our own tardiness in not being self starters and movers and shakers. Yet if we take a pause and focus on just all that we did right, all the successes we have enjoyed and the appreciation we have received, perhaps we would discover that the year gone by has been exceptionally good. We need to focus on the right actions we took, the good we encountered and our blessings rather than on trying to rationalize the negatives in our life.

An important lesson we can learn from appreciating the year gone by is that many of our successes  may not have created waves, nor would they have impacted many people or possibly they looked too trifle. Yet we recollect these moments because they made a difference to us. The reasons we value these moments and cherish it are as under:

  • We did it because we knew it was the right thing to do. E.g. stop our vehicle and help a disabled person cross the street or spend time with a friend facing a crisis or visit a sick person who yearned for some company.
  • We did not aim to please others as much as we did it to align our moral compass to our values. E.g. refusing to succumb to the temptation to copy despite knowing that you could fail in the exam or actively participating in a cause you root for even if it meant retribution from people in authority.
  • We did our best under the circumstances, for we focused on our strengths not our limitations. E.g. Volunteering to help when there is a calamity or Doing the most mundane task assigned because no one else was willing to do it.
  • We would have regretted not doing it then even if the consequences were hard on us subsequently. E.g. Making that extra effort to attend a friend’s wedding and sacrificing your annual visit to your hometown or sacrificing your free time and patiently teaching the neighbor’s kids mathematics because they were weak in it or sacrificing your weekends to help a new colleague settle down in the city.

Carry the spirit of doing what is right into the New Year and you will realize how blessed you are; you don’t need an applause, you don’t require special motivation, you don’t have seek approval and most of all you don’t have to ever regret anything you do.

Try these                                                            

  • Surprise 3- 5 people with an unexpected gift each.
  • Surprise yourself by trying to do something different. Maybe you could trying singing along with a carol singing group or become a Santa at the local departmental store or just experiment with your baking skills.
  • Start writing down your New Year resolutions. Ensure there are at least 2 things that you have never attempted in the past but want to give a serious try in the coming year.

 This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Failure is not the opposite of success

38- Faliure is not the opposite of successOnce we can orient our thinking to appreciate the tremendous insight provided by the above quote, chances are, we will never be apprehensive or fearful of failure. Failure has been stigmatized, it has been projected as the antonym of success and it has been the one word that every individual has been cautioned to keep away from. The reality is that failure has merits but unfortunately the word failure has been demonized and the merits cast away.  A glimpse of how failure is an essential part of success is shared below.

Provides painful lessons grasped quickly – While success is craved by everyone, the lessons from success are not as strongly ingrained in the mind as much as lessons learned from failure. Failure could be a painful outcome despite a good effort so it hurts more. However, it is the lessons learnt  from failure that enables one to reorient ones thinking, enables one to be creative, helps change ones approach to a problem and remains a constant reminder on how to avoid previous mistakes so as to achieve success. E.g. if one was tardy in studies the fail result in the report card and its consequences would be a good reminder to be more diligent in studies.

It is a hard rock on which one can built something strong – Failure provides one a strong rock like foundation to build on simply because one has to start again but this time one would be more alert, agile and astute. The pain and shame of failure is always a bitter pill to swallow.  Hence next time around one would invest time, energy and effort very cautiously and prudently so as to ensure one does not fitter away one’s resources.  At the same time failure highlights the chinks in one’s armor, helps one realize the importance of going back to the drawing board to work on a more robust plan that can succeed.  E.g. Steve Jobs life provides you a perfect script of success being tempered by failure and subsequent bigger success.

It acts as speed breakers on the high way of success – Success is often very heady and that can lead to reckless behavior. A failure is a wonderful speed breaker that tempers one’s exuberance, helps slow down ones pace to suit our temperament and above all ensures that we pause to refresh, recharge and resist the temptation to be over ambitious and take reckless risks. E.g. look at the monumental failures of once billionaires who took dubious means to multiply their wealth till their failures were exposed

It sensitizes one to be more humane and pragmatic The true measure of success is how one can have a positive influence on the environment around. Yet many equate success with wealth, influence and power alone.  Failure helps one realize his / her human failings, makes one look around in a more humane way and then channelizes success for the larger good of society. E.g. The spurt in voluntary CSR initiatives of corporates or the philanthropic initiatives of the rich are an acknowledgement of their belief that they have failed to use their wealth for the larger good of mankind and they are now making efforts to correct that.

It is just one extreme end of the continuum called life– Success is one end of a continuum called life. At the other end is failure. Seen differently they are two sides of a coin. You cannot relish success with out a taste of failure. One can better appreciate the joys of success only when one has tasted the bitterness of failure. Winning a game with no opponents will never give you an euphoria as much as winning games beating tough opponents. It is because failure exits that quest for success becomes more challenging and enjoyable. E.g. Ask Usain Bolt how much more valuable his gold medals from previous Olympics are, especially after his relative failure in his last races.

Try these

  • List out three of your major failure and the lessons each failure taught you.
  • List out your three major successes   and identify any failure that had a part to play in each of those successes.
  • What is the best compliment you ever got? Can you identify 3 reasons that made the compliment really worthwhile?
  • What are the areas of concern for you where you fear failure? What steps are you taking to ensure success in those areas?

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