Category: Strength

The scars tell a story

The scars tell a story

As one goes through life, an individual encounters various experiences; some pleasant, a few unpleasant and some experiences are so traumatic that they remain lifelong, like a scar left behind by a deep wound. Yet the fact that you have faced your challenges with courage and continue to progress in life, is a huge victory, and the scar left behind emotionally or physically,  becomes a symbol, a reminder and a story of the battles you have participated in.

Unfortunately life is unforgiving and so new battles emerge and the challenge is to cope with it. If you get scars let it not scar your life but let it just be scar on the flesh and not the spirit. This is tougher than it seems because it is the mind that needs to be tamed, the spirit that needs to be ignited and the future that one should beckon with open arms, if the wounds from the battle have to be healed and the scars become a distinguishing mark of your spirit.

Your scars will tell a proud story when you:

Believe in yourself – Until you believe that you have the moral courage and personal commitment to fight for your rights, you will rarely engage. Once you believe in yourself, then your focus will be on ensuring you are not denied what is your legitimate due. That is the time you take on the mighty with all your might and in the process you will get hurt, some injuries can be painful, occasionally you will be dispirited but when the dust settles after the fight, even if you have not won, you would have at least scored a moral victory and the resultant scars would become a badge of honor and inspiration.

Fight for your right – The intensity of your fight will directly proportionate to the intensity of your belief in the cause. Once you decide that you have a legitimate cause, no cross would be too heavy for you to bear. Discrimination, injustice, not getting your dues are causes that often trigger an individual to take cudgels for one’s self respect, rights and dignity. In the process, there would be some blood spilt, damage done and suffering to be endured. However, your conscience would be at ease once you have chosen to stand up for your rights. The resultant scars would again become proud badge of honor for you.

Stand up against injustice – You may perhaps not be affected but when you see those around you being denied justice, your conscience will often trigger action. Cowards may rationalize that it is not my fight but then if you don’t fight for your fellow men when they need support, then where and when will you get people to stand up for you when you are wronged? Injustice to anyone in any form must never be tolerated in civil society. However, standing by a cause that you believe in could mean taking on a fight against those more powerful, more self centered and more brutal. There could be serious consequences but the scars you get thereafter will be one’s you cherish.

Try these:           

  • List out the three major injustices that you believe are rampant around you. How can you work on mitigating these injustices?
  • Of all the rights you enjoy which is the one right you value the most. Do you think some sections of society are denied this right? Would you be able to lend your support to those denied this right?
  • What are the three rights as a citizen that you feel you are being denied? Can you write a strong letter to the concerned civic chief to get the matters addressed?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

First things first

First things first

In life there are times when we know what must be done to rectify a situation but either our ego or the fear of retribution or the anxiety of embarrassment hold us back. Yet, on hindsight, we do realize that the benefits of being first to rectify the situation far outweigh the short term concerns that prevent us from doing what is right. Three of the most classic cases of us suffering more for our procrastination in not taking the right step are as under:

Apologizing – The first to apologize is the bravest –  Our fear of retribution or occasionally our ego  will often over ride our sense of justice and we would often delay offering an apology for a mistake we have made or an injustice (albeit mistakenly ) committed. Yet the moment you decide that an apology is warranted and that too quickly, if you can gather the courage to apologize by  stifling the fear and/ or ego, you will realize that it is the bravest decision that you would have taken. Often it is also a very emotionally fulfilling decision because you would otherwise have to carry the guilt around. Mistakes happen to the best of us; however it is the bravest who can quickly apologize and seek forgiveness for the mistake.

Forgiving – The first to forgive is the strongest. – Our petty mindedness would trigger our ego and forgiving a mistake and accepting an apology would become a very difficult proposition. Unnecessarily we believe that by forgiving we are lowering our prestige or letting another go scot-free. The truth is that it takes a lot of courage to pardon someone who has knowingly or unknowingly hurt or troubled us. If we take an eye for an eye approach we would be carrying a burden of acting differently from what we really are. Instead by forgiving one who seeks forgiveness we would have displayed our moral courage and large heart. Forgiveness is a display of good character, sound values and the courage to do the right thing.

Forgetting – The first to forget is the happiest – If one nurtures a grudge, holds a past hurt to fuel fire to take revenge or allow ourselves to be consumed by rage and anger, it takes a toll on our mental peace, physical health and destroys our personal tranquility. For the hurt you feel, the disappointments you face because of others, the bad times that have overwhelmed you and the nagging need to get even with others, only results in you carrying an unseen burden within. Let go of that burden by forgetting the torments, the tormentors and the past and your heart, mind and body would feel lighter, less burdensome and certainly more relaxed. You will be a man with no worries; the person who is happiest.

Try these:           

  • Think of the time when you apologized for a mistake and you were not forgiven. What could be the reason for the other person not willing to forgive you?
  • What is the hurt/ anger/ guilt that you are still carrying around? Why is it that you are not able to forget the incident or forgive the person who hurt you?
  • If at all you have any painful memories of the past, how have you coped with it? Have you tried forgiving and / or forgetting it or the perpetrators if any ?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Death is not the biggest fear…

Death is not the biggest fear…

Death is a scary thought because it is a definitive end. We visualize that end and we are repulsed because we have so many unfulfilled dreams, so many wishes that we are sure will be realized if only we live. What we do not understand is the reality that, the real fear should be the realization that, what is yet to be achieved is not an accident but the result of us not risking enough to fulfill it. Even this understanding is comparatively superficial to the real fear that we are blissfully unaware of; being alive and expressing ourselves freely. We largely live a fearful life; fearful of expressing a minority view point; fearful of taking the side of your convictions; being afraid to stand up for the segregated, the marginalized, the deprived, the defenseless. In reality we are fearful but we fail to acknowledge it. Ask yourself this simple question ‘ Do I express myself freely, frankly, fearlessly on every issue that bothers me?’ You will realize that, subconsciously at times and deliberately most times, we hold back lest we are trolled, shadowed, shamed, stalked, assaulted, vilified, jailed or tortured by those who disagree with us.

Living is a risk; it carries the risk of us failing our potential; of us not standing up to be counted when the time comes; of cheating our conscious when it suits us; of us looking the other way when we should have stood by those in trouble; of telling blatant lies, white lies or being economical with the truth because the truth could hurt us; of being hypocrites, being insensitive, being inhuman and of being chameleons that change color to suit our survival. We do not risk living our real selves but live our lives to suit the world around. Can we honestly look in the mirror and look ourselves in the eye?

The fear of living, in day to day life, extends to us being fearful of skeletons tumbling out of our hidden closets; of pretending to be happy in relationships that have long ceased to exist; of doing jobs that we hate but cannot do without; of the demons of worry that beset us often; of losing loved ones; not fulfilling cherished dreams; of being made fun of or ridiculed; of having to pretend to be as rich, happy and successful as those around.

Yet, we have largely coped with these risks and that is what makes us reasonably successful. We have at times conquered our fears, occasionally learned to cope with it and sometimes succumbed to it. In our journey through life what makes us remain cheerful, optimistic and enthusiastic each day is not the absence of the fear of living but the presence of our sense of individuality, of knowing that we are an integral part of humanity and that each day has surprises that make our life love filled, fun filled and fulfilling.

Try these:           

  • Think of three occasions when you did not do, what on hindsight, you should have had the courage to do. How did you rationalize your failure to yourself? Would you have done things differently today of the same circumstances prevailed?
  • What were the three most courageous things you did, despite being aware of the consequences? Do you regret having lived by your convictions?
  • How do you deal with a person who is loud and self opinionated and gets very vocal with his/ her views when he/she sees you, because he/she knows you hold a completely dramatically opposite view point.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Be the first to make a difference to your life by…

14-17Aug14 -Standing first in lifeMistakes happen and when we realize it, we are often tempted to keep it under wraps. The logic used is that perhaps the mistake will never be noticed. Invariably though, mistakes do get noticed and the consequences are not too pleasant. The worst mistakes are those we make in our relationships. Here invariably we cannot hide the mistake but equally true is the realization that the mistake can strain and possibly break a relationship. It takes a lot of courage therefore, to admit to a mistake and apologize for it. We will be greatly relieved once we admit our mistake and sincerely apologize for it for that is when we discover our inner strength and character which in turn makes us brave enough to own up our fault. The consequences notwithstanding, be the first to admit to a mistake and apologize; for that is when your values and upbringing prop you up and define your personal and moral courage.

If you put yourself in the shoes of someone against whom a mistake has been committed, the natural reaction is to fly into a rage, seek revenge and hold grudges. Assume further that the mistake committed is by someone very close to you then you will definitely be seething with anger. If the other party has been brave enough to admit a mistake and apologize for the same, your character, upbringing and values will be severely tested at this point. How you react will be the defining moment for you. If you are harsh, rude and stubbornly unforgiving, it will belittle your personality. On the other hand if you can keep your rage in check, remain calm and composed when listening to the apology and thereafter magnanimously accept the apology and forgive the wrong doer, it will be testimony to your core values and inner strength.

It is relatively easier to apologize and to forgive, but is almost impossible to forget a hurt or slight suffered. Revenge, ill will and an eye for an eye are the normal dictums that keep buzzing in our mind. Invariably then, it is impossible to get rid of the feeling of hurt and forget the incident that triggered our angst. Unfortunately we do not realize that keeping a hurt alive only gnaws us from the inside; it seethes, it simmers, it is like an acid that corrodes the very container it is stored in. If one can imagine the futility of keep in mind a past hurt it would be easy to forgive and forget. The bad memories once erased offer space for more positive and pleasant thoughts to reside in the recess of the mind. It helps flower within us the seeds of happiness. Count blessings, forget hurts and live happy!

Try this:

Recollect a couple of negative feedback given to you by your

  • Teachers
  • Colleagues
  • Friends
  • Bosses
  • Family
  • Do you think any or most of it were unjustified? Did it help you improve? Do you still carry a hurt or grudge about any of the above persons who gave you a negative feedback?

List out names of 3 people (other than your family members) who have had a deep positive influence on you. Recount at least specific incident that you cherish about your interaction with that person.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.in