You will…

You will…

It is good to have great dreams, ambitions and aspirations. It means that you are thinking of the future, that you are focusing on certain achievements and that you seek to achieve something significant in your life. However, the more critical step is to overcome the doubts about your ability to realize your goals. In the beginning the dream looks enticing but as you begin to think more seriously and deeply about it, self doubts, fear of overcoming the obstacles and your own indecisiveness to commit to the goal become self limiting behavior.

You can do whatever you set your mind on but it requires effort. It is not just hard work but smart work that helps you reach your goals faster. Smart work is planning well for any task, identifying the best way to quickly and effectively manage a task and then putting it into practice. Hard work compliments smart work in that one has to diligently and consistently put in the personal efforts required. In some cases it could be merely doing a small part of the job yourself but would involve having systems and control over other tasks delegated or outsourced. The latter part is the outcome of smart work where you seek the help of experts or delegate routine jobs and you focus fully on the activities that you have to do yourself.

You should not let your concerns overshadow your dreams. The tendency to analyze indefinitely, the habit of vacillating between options and the wait for the right moment often derail well thought out plans. It is not to say that one must not be careful nor should one be impulsive. However one should be able to, within a reasonable time frame decide on the course of action to be taken so as to begin the journey towards achieving ones dreams/ goals/ passion.

You will when you start. Well begun is half done, provided, one begins. Waiting for all the pieces to fall in place before beginning would be an exercise in futility. The beauty of life is its unpredictability that is sometimes exhilarating and occasionally frustrating. Begin when you have the big picture and a reasonable amount of details in place. Be flexible in your progress so as to make adjustments to  chart your course right along the way. The key is to begin.

When you can set your mind to achieve something, then you should let your passion outweigh your concerns and you will succeed once you start.

Try these:           

  • Over the next one week get in touch with people who you know well but haven’t been in touch for over six months. Experience their surprise, more so when they realize your communication to them was just a friendly gesture.
  • Plan out a unique birthday gift for each of your family members. Execute it on the respective dates.
  • Tomorrow do something that you have never done before.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Fear and Courage – the difference is…

Fear and Courage – the difference is…

As individuals each of us carry a variety of fears and we try our best to keep it secret. At the same time we are we are very proud of some of our courageous deeds and would be ready to share it with any audience. Perhaps we would much more courageous stories to share if we saw fear and courage in the right perspective; fear is a reaction; courage is a decision.

Incidentally, FEAR is also a well know acronym, which when expanded reads as False Evidence Appearing Real (you can read more about it by clicking on the following link http://poweract.blogspot.com/2009/12/fear.html ) Hence almost all our fears are our mental reactions to what we imagine would be dangerous/ disastrous / hurtful / risky for us. At times we have third party evidence to suggest that the risk is real e.g. wild animals mauling humans or people falling off and dying when on a trek etc. What we fail to realize is that risk is omnipresent. Our reactions are impulsive, based on our mind quickly picturing negative images or incidents of happenings and we choose to play safe. It is not to suggest that fears are unwarranted. Fears play an important role in protecting us from danger or taking undue risks. Fear helps us prepare for eventualities like taking insurance, get vaccinations etc. The issue with living in the shadow of fear is our inability to move out of our comfort zone, not creating opportunities to realize our potential and not participating in joys, fun and adventure which is at a shaking hands distance.

Courage is a conscious action. This means it is a planned decision not a mere reaction. It is true that for self protection, there are times when we become courageous more impulsively than as a result of a decision but these are far, few and in between. True courage is daring to face the challenges knowing fully well that there is a whiff of failure, risk and at times even a threat to one’s life. Soldiers are trained to fight but it is their valor and courage that is on display during war. Similarly ordinary mortals like you and me, are often called to take a courageous stand against brute might, unscrupulous elements, cocking a snook at bribe takers and demanding our rights. The courage we display then is not accidental but a conscious, well understood and a moral stand that we decide to follow.  Courage is guts but it is not necessarily followed by glory and it definitely will leave us with less guilt and more self belief.  Courage is standing up for one’s beliefs, being able to withstand a brute majority viewpoint and speaking up one’s mind, standing by those whose cause you espouse despite massive opposition and standing by one’s conviction however unpopular they may be.

Try these:           

  1. List out 3 -5 issues on which you have very different views, as opposed to those who support it. Write a letter to the editor of the local news paper on each of these issues. Write each letter one week apart.
  2. Outline a concrete plan of action to overcome 2-3 of your greatest fears. E.g. fear of prisons or visiting mental institutions or fear of snake/ reptiles. Execute your plan.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

You are a born chooser

You are a born chooser

At this point that you are reading, you have chosen to read. The moment you stop reading, you have chosen not to read. The great thing about life is that life allows you to choose no matter who you are, whatever your background and however insignificant you may think you are. It is our choices that determines our progress not fate or luck or destiny. We choose our happiness, we choose our friends, we choose how to relate to others, we choose our attitude. Being a winner or a loser; a success or a failure; a leader or a follower; are all the outcome of our choices.

The question that we ask then is ‘How do we ensure we make the right choices?

Be independent – don’t be forced or coerced into selecting what others want. Having an independent mind, self belief and confidence are prime requisites to make decent choices. Never let others decide for you no matter who they are; they could be parents, siblings, elders, bosses, friends, well wishers for none of them can take responsibility for your choices. They can share their views, raise their concerns, introduce you to a different way of thinking and it would be wise to consider their suggestions but the final choice must be made by you without them forcing or pressurizing you in any way.

Analyze before you choose – weigh the pros and cons. Ideally your choices must never be based on snap decision except when it is an emergency. In all other cases, study, analyze, think, mull over, compare, contrast, weigh the options before you finally make the choice. Be careful not to fall into the trap of paralysis by analysis; which is nothing but indecisiveness.

Be decisive – don’t oscillate once you have chosen – A common problem faced by many is that after making a choice they have second thoughts. They then oscillate between the choice made and the alternatives thereby disturbing their peace of mind as also confusing those around. A few choices will go wrong for a variety of reasons but the fear of going wrong should not limit you from not choosing. Remember that not choosing and sitting on the fence can also have consequences and more importantly it is also a choice you have made albeit passively.

Review your choice – change it if you come up with strong reasons to change – There are times when new information or unexpected changes require you to review your choices. Do not be adamant and hold tight to your wrong choice. Reviewing and changing your choice for valid reasons is an important choice to be made. When required do not shy away from changing your choice.

Be prepared to pay a price for your choice – your choice always comes at a cost – For every choice you make you have to pay a price. Just as there are no free lunches in this world there are no choices that have no repercussions. Keep in mind that the price you pay is worth it for the benefits of your choice far outweigh the price you pay, which is the reason you made the choice.

Never regret – nor apologize – stand by your conviction – If you take responsibility for your choices, you will never regret nor apologize nor have self doubts. A choice that goes wrong simply means that you were inadequate in determining the right choice. It could also indicate poor preparation, lack of understanding, an obstinate refusal to pay the price for the choice or it could be simply that the goal posts changed unexpectedly. Believe in yourself and your choices.

Try these:           

  1. List out the last three choices that went wrong for you. Analyze the reasons for the choices going wrong.
  2. What would influence your choices in the following cases:
  • Taking up or refusing an opportunity to be posted abroad
  • Betting on the winner in a sports tournament
  • Participating in a dare
  • Moving out of your comfort zone
  • Standing guarantee or refusing to offer a guarantee for a loan taken by a friend

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Be a rainbow in someone’s cloud

Be a rainbow in someone’s cloud

Look around and you will find lots of people looking for support, encouragement, help and empathy. It need not be strangers; it could be close family members, neighbors, colleagues, acquaintances; the common thread is each of them is suffering in various degrees. While some may merely need reassurance, there could be a few others who need a hand of comfort and others just need someone to lend them their ears. On the extreme end of the spectrum, there could be others on the edge of a nervous breakdown, contemplating hurting themselves or on the verge of committing suicide. There are a lot of people around us alone, afraid, lonely and seeking acknowledgement of their existence. Each of us can play a vital role in making the world around us a more lively, engaging and happier place by just being a rainbow in the life of those around us living under the shadow of a dark cloud threatening to rain and drown them.

Like the seven colors of the rainbow VIBGYOR here are seven ways you can be a rainbow for others.

Acknowledge – Begin by wishing your family members each morning. Similarly by wishing or saying a hello to neighbors, acquaintances, friends whenever we bump into them would be the very basic courtesy one can extend to another. As social animals, every individual needs the company of others to live a meaningful life. By simply wishing and acknowledging them we are offering them our warmth which is always reciprocated and warms us too. Incidentally, using basic etiquette’s like saying please, sorry, thank you, excuse me etc. also largely do the same thing; respecting their individuality while also being courteous.

Smile – No one wants to see a grumpy, grouchy, cry booby. A smile, laughter, joy  is always welcome. Nothing can be more invigorating than a smile. A smile not only evokes a pleasant response, it actually energizes the self too. (SMILE is nothing but an acronym for See My Instant Life Energizer – click to read more about it here – http://poweract.blogspot.com/2010/01/smile.html )

Talk – Communication is the thread that binds human beings. While non verbal communication is both powerful and perhaps more widely used, it is talk that is consciously acknowledged as the principal medium of communication. An acknowledgement by way of a nod or a smile are powerful non verbal tools of communication, talking with another helps strengthen relationships. It also opens doors to better understanding and is a quick way to connect more intensely with people.

Help – Action, they say speaks louder than words. So while talk as a means of communication is powerful, it is any action that is offered in terms of helping another is the icing on the cake of relationships.  Simple acts like picking up something that some has dropped or helping someone with a heavy luggage or just spending time with the elderly or sick,  is help that would be much valued. Helping someone in trouble, be it rescuing someone or taking someone to a hospital or babysitting, putting in word to someone influential to get a problem sorted, donating blood when required  etc. are opportunities that  are relatively much more valued than monetary help. At times monetary help too is required but that is subject to our own ability to help out.

Encourage – Encouragement takes many forms. The most obvious is when a person is down an out, giving them some motivational inputs and allying their worries and fears. Encouragement could also take the form of heartily congratulating success and nudging the person to up the bar. Encouragement could also be subtle hints with appealing logic on how to do even better, suggesting course corrections and in extreme cases discouraging individual from taking a path of failure or self destruction. Appreciation is a fantastic form of encouragement. Achievements, good deeds, extraordinary performance all need to be appreciated, for that encourages individuals aim for higher glory. Since man does not live on bread alone, he needs encouragement to nourish his/ her spirit too.

Surprise them – A phone call to a long lost friend or a letter to a former teacher, a visit to an elderly friend or relative can be varied forms of surprises. Similarly sending a surprise gift on a significant occasion that you are privy to would be warmly appreciated and make a big difference to people. Volunteering help, finding solutions to problems of people who least expect it from you would always be much valued.

Share their sorrows – Happiness shared is doubled and sorrows shared are halved so the saying goes. The brightest rainbows are those that appear after a heavy shower. Be that rainbow in the life of people who are going through tough times, serious difficulties and those battling personal tragedies.

Try these:           

Try volunteering your services using any of your abilities/ talents to orphanages, hospice, prisons, old age homes, homes for the differently abled / mentally challenged.

Think back and make a list of people and events in which you were the recipient of any or all of the above support that lit up your life when you were in gloom.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Passion is priceless

Passion is priceless

The one question that is uppermost in the minds of people is ‘how can I make a success of myself?’ They are seeking answers that relate to the kind of education to be taken, the skills sets required and the type of work experience that can make an individual successful. They do get various answers and yet they remain confused for they are either not inclined to take the hard route or they feel they are inadequate to succeed. The secret to being successful lies in pursuing whatever one does with passion. If passionate no obstacle will be too hard, no mountain too high and reaching out to the stars would seem like child’s play.

You know you have the Passion when you meet the following conditions:

Deep interest – Unless one has a deep interest in whatever one pursue, passion would be the furthest thing that the person is pursuing it for. Very often students take specializations in the their studies not based on what they are interested in but based on what they think the future will want. While some of them manage to get motivated by the future, many students feel they are in a bind as they are unable to change tracks while having no liking for what they are pursuing. Making a success of the future without any interest in what one is pursing, is then an oxymoron.

Enjoying the pursuit How will a person not having any interest be ever enjoying what she/ he is doing. At times there would be some interested in a certain thing, but they find it hard to cope with the rigors demanded and so they do not enjoy what they do. Without enjoyment, there can be no passion. Take the case of someone pursuing professional sports. While the sport itself may interest the person, the waking up early, rigorous practice, strict diet regime etc may soon prove to be a cross to hard to bear. That is when enjoying the pursuit becomes a penance. No passion is ever penance.

Welcoming challenges – When one is passionate, one is always aiming to raise the bar higher. It is tougher, challenging and fraught with risk of failure. Yet, that is the true test of the deep passion one has for the activity being perused. The challenge keeps the adrenaline flowing, the motivation to succeed high and the pursuit of goals interesting. Welcoming and overcoming challenges is the proof of the passion one has for ones pursuits.

Finding reasons to continue – Many a time, despite ones best efforts, there will be problems, defeats, pain and frustration that will be hard to shake off easily. It is at those times, that one’s passion becomes the inspiration, reason and gives focus for continuing with hope. A classic case is when a player gets injured or has a lean season. Yet, with diligence, persistence and faith she/ he keeps practicing to get back into the reckoning. Even founders of startups face innumerable problems like cash flow trickling, key members leaving, orders not flowing in etc. It is their passion that will keep them going till they turn the corner. A reason to succeed is passion in play.

Try these:           

  1. What are the excuses that often crop up and impeded your pursuit of your passion? How do you propose to eliminate these excuses?
  2. List three of your passions as under
  • A passion that lets you relax
  • A passion that enables you pursue something you trying to get better at
  • A passion that you have yet to explore fully

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Choosing the right pain

Choosing the right pain

It is often said that pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. There is much truth in this statement. Today though, we are going to look at choosing the right pain so that suffering never becomes an option. This is the pain of discipline which in the long run is an excellent antidote against physical, emotional, moral and ethical suffering. The problem with discipline is one of finding the right motivation and sustaining it over a life time. Discipline is one pain that is not excruciating but is more in the nature of a dull ache that remains lifelong. However it is also a pain that is a constant reminder that one is active, making progress and rapidly moving towards attaining some goals.

While motivation is the fulcrum around which discipline revolves, there are other factors that play an equally critical role. Here is what one needs to do to cope with the pain of discipline so that the ache is relatively easier to bear and put up with.

Set goals – The first thing each individual needs to have in front of her/ him are clear cut goals to be achieved. Very broadly one must have goals for personal, financial, professional and emotional aspects of one’s life. Goals must not be mere dreams or hopes but clearly outlined end points to reach. Use SMART goal setting to list out your goals. Your first goal is to read up on SMART goal setting and write down your goals.

Plan your day – Remember school days where there was a time table that helped ensure you did all the home work and prepared for tests. It did help that the schools and teachers were strict and enforced the discipline. Something similar like a time table existed in college too but we were largely given a choice to follow it. Except for attendance being taken off and on, no one really enforced anything. Perhaps that is the point where we lost focus in following a time table. If one has a plan or time table for the day, it enables one to focus on tasks required to attain the targets set. More importantly one can prioritize which is the key to time management which is another important aspect of being disciplined.

Make no excuses – Excuses are the bane of discipline. Waiting for an auspicious day, date or time is one excuse that delays starting. However even more dangerous are the frivolous reasons or excuses that we use to rationalize being indisciplined. Eliminate excuses and pronto you get disciplined.

Learn to say NO – If excuses are a bane for discipline, our inability to say NO to others as well as to our own devilish mind are the super bugs that destroy any semblance of discipline in us. Saying NO to others is viewed as being rude, bad mannered and very unpleasant. However what we forget is that one needs to say NO to anyone or any situation that is potentially harming our interests. It does not mean that we are self centered but focused on the greater good for the self. We certainly refuse sugar in any form if suffering from serious diabetes but find it hard to say NO to something that will definitely disturb our discipline and in turn cause hurt or damage to us. Incidentally, even a diabetic may find it hard to say NO to a very tempting dessert and all the good work done to control his/ her diabetes is undone because of lack of self discipline.

Find MOTIVATION – Motivation comes from fear or gain. The first form of motivation is rather negative in outlook but is just as effective to be disciplined. Fear of ill health is the major reason for people adopting healthy life styles be it exercising, eating right, avoiding smoking etc. However the greater motivator is the prospect of gain. Being appreciated for the fitness, feeling energetic and looking smart are more appealing reasons for having a disciplined life style. Similarly find intrinsic motivation to be disciplined. Intrinsic motivation is  the Motivation that gives you a high from within. Intrinsic motivation is more sustaining, readily adopted and much more fulfilling in the long run; discipline is nothing but embracing motivation.

Try these:                 

  • Have you written down your goals? If not do it first.  Next write down the special actions required to be taken to achieve your goals.
  • Practice saying NO at least three times a day. Toughest is to say NO to a boss / person in authority. When was the last time you said NO to your boss?
  • Can you identify your motivation to read this post till this point? How are you going to make use of the learning’s from this post?
  • If you had time to do just three things before you die, what are the three things you would do? Can you do them NOW?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Live your dreams

Live your dreams

Parental direction, supervision by teachers and society expectations are the influences with which most of us are brought up with. As a result, the conditioning of individuals is largely focused on pleasing the expectations of these diverse set of influencers. Net result is that we surrender our individuality, create an artificial being who is meeting expectations of others but is often deeply dissatisfied within. To break out of this circle is tough because it would mean charting one’s own course with little hope of support and the possibility of not fully attaining the dreams one has. Yet the fact that we have just one life and it is better to make it ‘my own life’ rather than ‘trying to fit into someone else’s view of life’ should be incentive enough to break out and furrow one’s own path.

Dream it – The path to your personal glory begins when you can dream about what is the glory you seek for yourself. The dream need to be grandiose, it can be off beat, it must be something that ignites enthusiasm in you and above all it must be clearly visible in your inward eye. You want to be the top honcho; go for it. You want to play for your country; nothing can stop you except you. You just want to be a happy contented person; seek ways and means to realize that dream. Just ensure it is your personal dream not something you are doing to make someone else happy. The size of your dream does not matter. The quality of your dream determines how you go about attaining it.

Develop it – If the dream is clear, it is time to wake up and get about the business of achieving it. It all begins with planning. Create a blue print; develop a road map; outline the milestones. No dream is realized by pure luck. You want to win a lottery; first step is to invest in the ticket. So everything begins with having a goal, charting out the steps to realizing it, in built the strategy to overcome hurdles, be mentally prepared for a long haul and then start.

Do it – The key to shaping the world the way you want it is by beginning in earnest, continuing with passion and striving for excellence. It is possible that along the way there would be hiccups, obstacles, demotivation and frustration. Yet if the goal is clear the patch well chalked out and your confidence and self belief intact, you will ride the momentum built by your passion to reach the destination. However, action is a long drawn out and often a lonely journey. At times it makes you revisit your own decision. Other times you get energized by the thought of achieving what you have dreamt of. Many a time you will be criticized, condemned, ridiculed and roughly sidelined. That is when your intense desire to leave your own unique mark in the world will be the only thing that will fuel your spirit to create, conquer and rule your own destiny.

Try these:

  1. Try living for a month on one third your normal monthly expense.
  2. Give 4 hours of your time weekly to any social cause. Be part of a social organization or do something tangible for a cause you believe in.
  3. Work on overcoming one bad habit you know is limiting your effectiveness.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

The power within you

The power within you

From childhood, we are taught to respect authority and to seek approval from parents, elders, and authorities before we take any major action. We also look upto them for approval to confirm that we have done a good job. There is logic and wisdom in this method for those older and wiser have greater experience and expertise which comes in handy to guide a novice.  Yet, as the years go by the novice begins to gain experience, wisdom and independent thinking. At times her/his knowledge may far exceed that of his elders. However just as old habits die hard, the need to seek approval remains partly as a mark of respect but chiefly because one hesitates to break the ties and be our own person. Maturity and independence is  translated into power when the  individual takes that giant leap of making her/ his own decisions without any approval of others. It also marks the coming of age of the individual and is a sign of the power each individual holds within.

Here are the steps to realizing and utilizing your real power:

Take responsibility – This is the key to becoming powerful. Unless one takes responsibility for the consequences of a decision / action, it is impossible for a person to be powerful. It is easy to take credit for success but almost impossible to take complete responsibility for failure. The tendency to apportion blame on circumstances, people and bad luck is common place but to own up to the problem is a tad difficult.

Be decisive – A major reason for people not using their full potential and power is their indecision. Sometimes tough decisions have to be taken for the larger good. The tough decisions can have serious consequences for some and great leaders are aware of this yet firmly give their orders. A general in war may have to sacrifice his people for the greater good of winning the war. At other times the same General may have to surrender because he knows his army cannot win and large number of lives from both sides would be lost.  In life we have our own personal wars with simple things like changing a job or giving up on a dream or pursuing a passion that is disapproved by all well wishers.

Look beyond – Your real power is not in what you achieve in the short term but how you go about realizing your big dream. Think big, think beyond the immediate horizon, and visualize the impact you will have on the world around you when you peak. What you do today must help you leap ahead of the completion. That is the way a leader goes up and leaves the rest of the pack behind. Take the pack along as you go but lead the pack with a promise of glory and join them in toasting the success you envisioned and achieved.

Shape it your way – Furrow your own path. Do not imitate. You must carve out your own destiny and shape it the way you have visualized it. It must be different, unique and special for you. This does not mean that you do something no one has done before. It means that you do it the way a music director comes up with a new tune or music arrangement. It must be music to your ears, colorful in your eyes and pleasing to the heart. The world around must also get to feel the same in their lives and heart.

Try these:

  • Think of the three most important decisions in your life that you have taken. What was the outcome? Were you influenced by anyone to take any or all of these decisions? Which was the toughest decision you took and why was it so hard? Which decision do you ever regret and why?
  • What was the most humiliating or painful experience in your life? How did you feel then and how do you feel now? Do you still carry the hurt with you even now? Have you made peace with that episode yet?
  • Take crayons or paint and explore abstract art. E.g. take a piece of paper and fold it in two. Open the paper and on one side at various places put various colors of wet paint. Then fold the paper and randomly rub it in any direction. Open the paper and see the handiwork. Similarly you can experiment using a couple of strings in the paper then folding the paper and drawing out the strings. The quality of the outcome is less important than the experience and variety of art work you manage thereafter.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

The elimination diet

The elimination diet

The focus of a healthy diet is largely on what is good to eat and then on eliminating what must be avoided. To have a healthy mind and body a similar approach must be taken with emphasis on the emotions and feelings over which must exercise control and eliminate. That in turn will give space for healthy emotions and feelings to fill up and expand the quality of one’s life. The following unhealthy emotions must be eliminated so that one can have ample space to plant and nurture good emotions.

Anger – Anger they say is one letter short of danger. It is an emotion that is relatively easily provoked, often over trivial’s and frequently indulged in when the opposite party is a loved one who we often take for granted. The hacks to control anger include taking deep breaths, delaying any response to any provocation, responding instead of reacting, walking away from a potentially explosive situation etc. (Read more about Anger by clicking on the following link – https://actspot.wordpress.com/category/anger/ )

Regret – Looking back hoping things could have been different will never change the reality that you are in. Regrets only open up old wounds, create dissatisfaction with the present and drains a person emotionally. By eliminating regret, the focus shifts to the blessings of the present and using the opportunities available will open the doors to progress and success.  ( Read more about regret by clicking on the following link- https://actspot.wordpress.com/category/regrets/ )

Resentment – By hating someone and harboring thoughts of revenge all one is doing is fueling resentment for another. Resentment merely saps our energies by diverting it to imaginary, non productive and a dangerous path of self destruction. It is best to let bygones be bygones. Avoid people or situations that have got you grief so that you do not have to keep wondering about getting even. Instead focus on how you can succeed despite all the obstacles that you have had to face.

Guilt – While you may have some regrets about your behavior or the harm you caused others never let that guilt keep gnawing at your conscience. Ideally be brave enough to apologize and confess your mistake so that the slate is wiped clean. If you let guilt shadow you, the rest of your life you will be leading with one eye behind to see if the shadow is still around. It will slow down your effectiveness, make you less of a risk taker and send you on frivolous guilt trips that drain out your mental peace and energies.

Blame – Blame is the antithesis of responsibility. Blame is merely a way to pass on the buck. The responsibility is often never fixed on the right shoulders, the problems remain and blame only offers temporary let off. A blame game is the only game where there are no winners merely poor losers. It can also create animosity and bad blood leading to broken relationships. Occasionally blame also brings with it a fair share of guilt too. Growing up takes place when one is willing to shoulder responsibility; blame won’t nurture that.

Worry – Worry they say is like sitting on a rocking chair- lots of movement but not going anywhere. Worry never solves problems. It becomes a millstone round the neck that weighs a person down from performing her/ his best. Worry also triggers a wide variety of ill health physically, mentally and emotionally. It is best to embrace the reality and move on with life. The past cannot be changed; why waste time worrying over it. The future  is there for you to utilize; how about planning, thinking, working on making a wonderful future. ( To read more click on the following – https://actspot.wordpress.com/tag/worry/ and https://actspot.wordpress.com/category/past-2/ )

Try these:

  1. Make a list of the anger, regret, resentment, guilt, blame, worry that you still have within you. After writing it put the list in a small box and put the box away. It can help detoxify you from these negative emotions that you have held so long in your heart.
  2. When was the last time you did the following:
  • Apologized to someone who you had wronged
  • Let go of a guilt.
  • Forgave someone who had wronged you.
  • Took the blame for someone else’s mistake
  • Worried about something that never happened

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Don’t Quit but ideally go ahead and DO IT

Don’t Quit but ideally go ahead and DO IT

In a fast paced materialistic world, quick success is what the expectation norm is. Unfortunately this also comes with a downside that people give up too fast when they do not attain what they seek in the short time frames they set for themselves. Society in general, the family unit and the community in particular are equally to blame for pushing people to achieve unrealistic expectations. Higher exam scores, high paying jobs, amassing wealth etc. have become the yardstick to judge success. Gone into the background are qualities like hard work, honest ways, morals and etiquette’s. Perhaps this explains the rising suicides, the increase in psychological/ neurotic illness, spate of violence and rampant intolerance reflected in incidence of road rage, robberies, cyber crimes and off late trolling. The average conscientious citizen then is under tremendous pressure to perform or quit. It takes tremendous courage, will power and self respect to follow ones dreams, passion, goals and to express ones thoughts freely, in the face of constant scrutiny, criticism and unrealistic expectations from others.

I am sharing an Acronym that should be a good guide to help you overcome the feeling of quitting and instead of simply saying a passive Don’t Quit and keep it for another time, become proactive and go on and DO IT  :

Develop – The focus is on finding ways and means to work and bring into fructification various dreams, aspirations, goals that you have set for yourself. Do not let criticism, negativity or failures hamper you from pursuing your ultimate aim. Developing your mind, spirit and work is essential for you to make progress however slow in the right direction. The task may seem ominous, it may begin to sprout doubts in your mind but as long as you plant the seeds of self belief, exude passion and are prepared to roll up your sleeves and work you will develop in body, mind and soul.

Opinions – Form your own opinions and also seek the opinion of those who matter. Consult elders, experts, mentors and those in your circle of positive influence. Each of them will be able to contribute even if it is by way of constructive criticism or pragmatic wisdom or by simple encouragement. Remember they have your welfare in mind. However, also remember that they may not be able to see your vision or feel your passion and so they could be conservative in their thinking and opinions. Ultimately you have to assimilate and then decide the course of action or the corrective course of action to be taken. Focus on Doing it.

Ideas  – You mind might be spinning with ideas. You see opportunity in various forms. At the same time you could also be seeing problems in every opportunity. Remember that the problems are there to make you grounded and realistic but not put to make you pessimistic and faint hearted. At times some ideas seem to be exceptional and you are just itching to get it going. All ideas need to be vetted thoroughly and mulled over and planned. Only then can you begin. Follow the process and Do It.

Thoughts – The crux of success lies in your ability to think positively. Your thoughts must be focused on achieving your plans and goals. Your thoughts must be on finding solutions, overcoming obstacles and managing constraints. This will enable you to come up with alternatives, bring about clarity on how to proceed further and will also reinforce your belief in your plans. Never let the mind falter when you face a crisis. Instead, use the power of you mind it to think differently, to be innovative and to be goal focused. Solutions will present itself . All you need to do then is DO IT.

 Try these:

What are the three things you have kept on hold and not attempted yet. How about drawing up an action plan to DO IT?  Then instead of just saying Don’t Quit but I shall keep it on the back burner now say DO IT and get cracking.

How about attempting something new that you never ever thought of doing?  Maybe learn some new skill or be a wee bit more adventurous with your choice of picnics/ parties / get together. Go on ensure that you DO IT differently the very next opportunity that comes.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

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