Tag: be optimistic

The secret to happiness

13-25-Happy days are around you...

The essential condition for being happy is enjoying the moment. The problem is that our mind tends to wander around and seeks to find real and imaginary problems to dwell upon and fret and fume over. The human tendency to scan around for problems is possibly a defense mechanism to protect our future for we are the only species that uses the higher intelligence to embrace progress. In effect this means that each day we want to get ahead of the previous day and this creates in us a fear of tomorrow for it has to be better than today and yesterday. Protecting our future and planning for it is important but it must never be at the cost of failing to enjoy the better part of our life. Stress is primarily an outcome or result of our obsession with the future and is a predominantly found in the human race.

To reduce our stress it is essential that we find a way to like each moment of our life and love our life. This means we need to create/ find/ invent / be happy. The challenge is to remain happy for as long as possible and that is possible only and only when we learn to enjoy whatever we have.  Here are some ways that we can continue to be happy moment to moment.

Appreciate what you have. We tend to take for granted whatever we are blessed with and on the rare times we are deprived of some of these blessings we notice the absence and react with alarm, fear, worry and exasperation. Look back at the time you sprained your ankle or suffered from flu or the time you misplaced a valuable thing. Your attitude and behavior is symptomatic of our tendency to take the good fro granted and the unwanted as a calamity. Remember the phrase; I complained because I had not shoes until I saw a man who had no feet.

Don’t compare. Nothing disturbs our peace of mind as much as our tendency to compare whatever we have with that of others who we perceive as having something better than what we have. In many ways our inability to appreciate what we have often has its roots in our weakness to focus on what others have. Pause for a moment and think about the possibility that ‘perhaps we are blessed with just the right mix leaving us enough opportunities to aspire, perspire and inspire us to achieve and attain more’ giving us the elation of achievement and success.

Be optimistic. Problems, hindrances, failures, fears and frustrations are part of everyday life. We are given the grace to be optimistic; to be hopeful, to visualize possibilities and to find creative ways to overcome and slay the demons of our negative imagination. It is when we are optimistic that we confront our fears and stop ourselves from running away from the problems we encounter.

Seek positives. When in difficulties, pain or trouble our reaction is to alleviate the suffering. The challenge thereafter is to be calm, have a clear head and to think logically so that we not only overcome our difficulties but come out unscathed. Almost all the prisoner of war (POW) escapes can be attributed to seeking out the positives even in the most inescapable circumstances. Ask yourself if you are a POW of your making; your defeatist attitude, your weak will and/ or your inability to confront reality.

Have fun. Have you seen people in casts displaying a variety of messages written on the cast by friends and well wishers? Have you seen people with a big smile hobble on crutches to a party or come on a wheel chair to the party? Ever notice that the best jokes are the ones people tell about themselves and the embarrassing situations they found themselves in?  The ability to laugh, to have fun, to find a reason to smile is perhaps the greatest gift you can bestow yourself.

Try this:

  • Prepare a funny paragraph containing the words. Each paragraph must have 5 sentences at least and must contain 7 -10 words from the list given below. The paragraphs need not be logical but must be coherent and humorous.

Man, socks, dog, green, TV, nail, Egg, elephant, hook, water, clock, TV, bucket, Adam, Ram, Flag, blue, wheel, cycle, eat, run, scream.

  • Prepare a list (laughs that you can have) of at least 5 each of the following
  1. Jokes
  2. Limericks
  3. Comedy Movies
  4. You tube clips
  5. Cartoons
  6. Sayings / Phrases

(You are welcome to share your contribution by writing in to actspot@gmail.com. Please give your name and age along with your contribution. Select contributions ( emphasis will be on originality and quality of humor) would be featured in this blog. )

 This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Enjoying the sunshine

If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you’ll never enjoy the sunshine. Morris West

There are a few people who perennial live as if there is a Damocles sword hanging over them.  There are others who live a carefree life till they experience an unexpected blip in their life and then they are so wary of life that they live in the constant shadow of an ominous future. Then there are the odd balls who enjoy everything that life offers as long as the status quo is maintained but get paranoid about any hint of a change be it a job change, relocation or even marriage and then they keep their eyes peeled for anything that will justify their fears. Taken together the list of people who have a lurking fear at the back of their minds is quite substantial.

While it is prudent to be vigilant and cautious, living in constant worry simply saps the fun out of life. It is when one steps out of one’s comfort zone that we discover the many joys that life has in store for us. For example we envy another’s hairstyle or dress but won’t dare to try that out. At other times when we are complimented for something we wonder if that is a sarcastic comment or remain unconvinced that the comment was genuine. In effect what happens is that we rarely relish the moment nor do we carry any nostalgic memories of those wonderful moments. Life then is no longer fun filled but turns out to be a chore that has to be mandatorily gone through. Imagine trying to sleep well knowing full well that you have to get up at an odd hour in the morning to catch an early morning flight; that is but a small hint of the type of life one lives when worry is a constant companion

If one has to overcome this fear psychosis it is imperative that one makes a conscious effort to appreciate that most of these anxieties and fears are actually trivial and a daily occurrence in almost every person’s life. Simultaneously one must also try to appreciate the downside of any eventuality and we realize that almost all of it has a very limited downside and nothing actually life threatening is involved. This should give us the comfort that in life most times we need to cross the bridge when we come to it. Once we have this assurance, it become easier for us to look out for those wonderful thrills and pleasures life has to offer us in plenty. Be it the beautiful sunny morning, or a torrent of rain when we least expect it or the pleasure of a sumptuous meal or the receipt of a surprise gift.

Nothing helps one enjoy life as much as treasuring the most trivial things. New parents are constantly looking out for the new born’s smile, gurgle, peaceful angelic sleep and as they grow up they cheer the first words uttered, the first baby steps taken etc. To a casual onlooker this behavior may seem silly and hyped but for the parents it is a high point in their lives. We too need to be like new parents everyday, seeking out the small pleasures be it the aroma of home cooking, the blooming flowers in our garden or the first scribbling of our child on the walls of the house. It is when we try to rationalize every act, ascribe motives for happenings or anticipate eventualities anxiously  that we end up seeing demons instead of the angels all around.

Remember: Negativity is an addiction to the bleak shadow that lingers around every human form … you can transfigure negativity by turning it toward the light of your soul John O’Donohue

Try this:

  1. If you have never attempted any of these activities because of your negative mindset about it, choose one activity to attempt over the next one year
  • Climb a mountain
  • Go for a 2 day trek
  • Live in a remote village for 3 days without any electricity
  • Go deep sea fishing with fishermen
  • Volunteer at an old age home / orphanage for 3 day at a stretch
  1. Make a list of 12/24 positive thoughts/ quote/ sayings. Tape it up on your mirror and read it every day and try to put the learning into practice. Change the quote every month or fortnight depending o the number of quotes you have. Notice the change in you during that period.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

The spirit within..

We die daily.  Happy those, who daily come to life as well.  George MacDonald

Every day brings about something new though all of it may not be pleasant and delightful. As mentioned in yesterdays post, at birth we are stamped with our expiry date, which in effect means that with each passing day a day in our life is dead. Yet, we are able to cheerfully look forward to the next day in hope and expectation that the new day brings forth even better tidings and gifts. How can one be cheerful, when we already know that every passing day brings us closer to our personal expiry date?

To understand this paradox, we need to appreciate the beauty of life. Life gives us ample opportunities to learn, grow and fulfill our potential. It is this growth physical, mental and spiritual that is the elixir of life and is the core of our living. We are nourished in this growth by the graces granted, the passion within and the love that encompasses us in varying shades be it parental love, love of our siblings, spouse, children or the love showered on us by friends, colleagues and the society at large. Every morning is then a celebration of life for it brings with it another 24 hours of challenges, opportunities and rewards. In accepting these challenges cheerfully, we grasp the opportunities given by life to reward ourselves each day. The biggest reward being the sense of achievement, the joy of giving and sharing and seeing the progress made in which we have played a part too.

Happiness is an inside job; yes we and only we can experience it. No one can inject us with a dose of happiness. It is imperative that we realize this unique feature of happiness and then strive to align our thought process our style of living and our entire attitude in a manner that enables us to exude happiness at all times. No doubt we will always be confronted with moments of intense grief, deep disappointment and trying times of anger and despair. Death, failure, betrayal are happenings too terrible to come to terms with but fortunately for us time is a great healer. When we are ready to see the brighter side of life, overlook the irritants that hurt us and make peace with our tormentors, accept our own limitations and can visualize joy and happiness in the little miracles that life provides daily, that is when we really LIVE LIFE the way it was meant to be.

Remember: “Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

Try these:

  1. List out 5 things that you do not posses at this point in time that you believe will bring happiness to you. Outline a plan to obtain these in the next two- five years. If you think that is not possible then  you need to revise the list to incorporate those things that will give you happiness and can be obtained in the next 2-5 years. Don’t you think it is pointless to pine for what you can never get?
  2. Make a list of 5 people in whose lives you want to bring special happiness.  Have not more than 2 family members in the list and ensure there is at least 1 stranger in the list. What do you think will give them the greatest joy by your proactive approach? Get cracking on doing all that you think will ensure their happiness at the earliest.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

Give your best

Give to the world the best you have and the best will come back to you. Madeline Bridges

There are times when we enthusiastically plunge into a task with confidence and vigour. The task complete, we might be taken aback to see that our hard work and efforts have not given returns commensurate to our expectations. It is at this point that self doubt creeps in and we begin to question our abilities, wonder if we really need to put in as much effort as we did and mentally remonstrate that next time we just do the bare minimum to get the talks done.

Giving up is easy, but it is self-defeating. Throwing in the towel even in a boxing match is actually done by the coach of the loser not the loser himself, so how justified are we in giving up simply because the returns fall short of our expectations. Giving of our best, ensures that we have planned well, put in our best efforts and we have done a diligent job. When we can consistently replicate that, we would experience a tremendous sense of achievement irrespective of the results of the effort. When we examine our work done we would also notice that in many subtle ways we have been rewarded ; the experience itself is invaluable, the feeling of achievement is very fulfilling, our confidence in ourself is reinforced and we can be optimistic that we will be justly rewarded too.

The most amazing thing about giving of our best is that more often than not we actually end up getting the best that life has to offer. It could be a promotion, a better job offer, appreciation from the least  likely source, recognition by peers and superiors or simply the sense of achievement and contentment that soothes us in body, mind and spirit. If we step back and count our blessings we will realise that we are fortunate to get so much and you can be sure it is not an accident but as they say ‘ What goes around comes around”

Remember : “The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today.”

Try these :

  • Outine 3 – 5 tasks that you have done that you are very proud of. Ask yourself if you were forced to do it or you did it own you own. When forced to do it how did you over come your reservations about the task. Did you experience a sense of achievement at the end of the task?
  • In your current role, what are those tasks that you dislike immensely and why. Do you think there are better ways to tackle those tasks? Are there only a few tasks that you find it hard to give of your best or most tasks look tough to you?What activities excite you and motivate you the most? Have you examined the possibility of making a career out of those tasks?
  • How do you realise that you have given of your best in what you do? Do you appreciate good jobs done by others? How do you indicate your appreciation or dissatisfaction to others?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You ar also welcome to visit our weekly inspirational and motivational blog www.poweract.blogspot.com