Tag: Be Yourself

Be the person you are

To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are. Anon

Right from childhood we are greatly influenced by the people we adore and love. While it maybe our parents in our formative years, as we grow up we form our Idols be they sports persons, actors/ actresses, writers or philosophers. Most of the time we are in awe of their achievements; we envy their success and crave for their popularity. As a result we slowly get obsessed with these idols that we start following their actions, their style and mannerisms. Occasionally we also end up imitating them because we feel we can make a beginning by copying them.  When we are so enamored by our idol, we rarely see the other side of them, their limitations, their weakness or their fallibility. We end up believing that our idols can never be wrong and that they are the epitome of excellence.

Unfortunately what we do not realize is that while we can be ardent admirers, we cannot be exact duplicates and more importantly the world wants a new individual not a replica. It is even more important to realize that each of us is born as a unique personality having characteristics, mannerisms, styles and abilities which are never fully tapped nor the potential realized. It is when a person uses his/ her talents and abilities, realizes their full potential and stands out in a crowd that the world at large appreciates and applauds the contribution of the individual. It is good to have dreams but the dreams must focus on what one wants to achieve and it should not be limited to imitating another. When you dream of some personal goals, set some ambitious targets, visualize your personal success story that is when you set the stage for a sterling performance and the real you comes to the fore and holds center stage.

Even the most mediocre person has something unique to offer. If nothing else their smile would be something that has a warmth of its own and it can brighten the environment and cheer up all around. It is a pity that the vast majority of human beings lack self belief and find it hard to recognize their personal strengths. One important reason for this lack of self belief is our penchant to compulsively compare our abilities with that of another person and invariably it is with someone who is very adept. The net result is that we end up feeling that we do not have anything much to showcase or boast about. Perhaps our parents and teachers are partly responsible for this since they would always compare your scholastic achievement with that of the class topper leaving you unappreciated and disheartened. For example, it often happens that when you have topped English in the exams the focus of parents and teachers is on the relatively low score in Mathematics that you have got. Perhaps English is your strength but now it seems inconsequential in your eyes.

Ideally, each person must be proud of his/ her own individuality that is reflected in our behavior, attitude, mannerisms, manners and performance. If you are criticized evaluate it, if the criticism is valid learn and make changes to improve; if the criticism is harsh and in your view unwarranted don’t take offense simply ignore it.  Begin to appreciate those aspects of your personality that others envy and /or appreciate. Build up on these strengths. Eg. Even if academics is not your strong point you might be a brilliant organizer and team leader. Leverage those strengths and soon you will find that you are much sought after and become a great influencer. The biggest benefit is that you will rediscover the real you !

Remember: Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it. Bruce Lee

Try this:

  1. List out the alphabets of your first name and make a positive adjective that is applicable to you starting with each alphabet. Eg. JOHN Jovial Outspoken Handsome Nice or JOAN Jester Original Active Helpful. Now if you can ensure that these qualities are displayed by you in you day to day living so that people recognize these strengths in you. Next do a similar exercise with your surname.
  2. Focus on those positive qualities that are greatly appreciate by your friends/ superiors/ peers/ family etc. Seek ways and means to use it even more effectively. Eg. if you are seen as a meticulous person, volunteer to be a coordinator for some small events at office / local association etc.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

Be yourself

Do not wish to be anything but what you are.  Saint Francis de Sales

A unique quality of the human race is our ability to compare and contrast. There is nothing wrong with that as long as it is with a view to improve. Unfortunately, most times we end up envying others and ruing our fate; we envy their success, their riches, their popularity, their happiness not to mention their luck and good fortune.  It is this tendency to selectively compare that brings about frustration, anxiety and complete blindness to our own riches. We will take our blessings for granted because the other person too has similar blessings, we discount the others limitations and pain because that does not pinch us but we crave for the others fortunes because we pine for what we do not have.

It is easy to believe that we were tricked by fate; for it is a convenient way of feeling at ease.  It is much more difficult to accept that it is not easy to wear another’s crown. We see the trappings of power but never the pain of responsibility and decision making. We would not dare walk in another’s shoe for it may pinch but we don’t mind a ride on horseback if that is the exclusive prerogative of the king  even if w can barely hold the reins or sit right on the horse. That we maybe throw off by the horse or by our own foolishness is never considered a remote possibility.  Alas for an amateur that is a very real danger and it can then be a very painful memory.

On the other hand if we are able to simply leverage our strengths, we would realize that our potential is exceptional. If we pay attention to what we have rather than what others have, if we realize our limitations instead of pricking holes in another’s abilities we would be able to appreciate that our limitations are so miniscule. It may then dawn on us that we are better equipped as we are and that the others carry a much heavier burden that robs their sleep, their happiness and peace of mind. Fear, guilt, avariciousness, loneliness, illness, are some of the worst pains suffered by those who have material wealth but lack the personal happiness that many of us are so fortunate to have.

The best part of being what we are is that we can take full responsibility for all we do. We will never have to worry that we may have got something bad from another nor do we need to share the credit with another when we succeed.

Remember: “I would much rather have regrets about not doing what people said, than regretting not doing what my heart led me to and wondering what life had been like if I’d just been myself.”  Brittany Renée

Try these:

  1. Jot down 2 unique strengths you posses, 2 passions that you have and 2 major weaknesses that you are aware off.  Now assuming you can trade 1 weakness along with 1 strength and 1 passion and get the same replaced from just one person, name the person and the weakness, strength and passion you are willing to forego and what will you keen to acquire?
  2. How will you go about harnessing a hidden talent / potential/ craving/ desire that you have? E.g. Let us say you believe you can be a good writer. Outline steps that you will implement from today to check if you really have such a spark within you.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

You only live once

You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die, or when.  You can only decide how you’re going to live. Joan Baez

As we look at our life dispassionately, we would realize that while we would proclaim our independence aloud, we are actually creatures of conformity. We suddenly find our lives intertwined with those of the parental values and expectations, shaped by peer pressure both in our society and work environment, significantly influenced by our relationships with our children and spouse and tempered by our teachers, the books we read, the newspapers we scan and the internet and other social interactions. We also make the painful realisation that a lot f our personal ambitions, creativity and deep cravings have been suppressed, subdued and stifled by our inhibitions and indifference.

It takes a lot of courage and guts to live on your own terms. Our bonds with societal norms are so strong that very often we are looking across our shoulders to see who is observing us, what are the comments and observations of people and there is pressure to keep pace with the changing trends and fashions. It is only when the inner cravings are too strong to be ignored, the restlessness in our heart too painful to be brushed aside lightly and when we are encouraged by the example of others that we take the plunge and throw ourselves into the deep end of the pool of life. Often there are pitfalls that were unseen, storm clouds of uncertainty but the zeal in the heart and the burning desire to achieve something that drives us towards our goal.

Many a time we are tempted to believe that we shall pursue our passions when we retire. By that time it is possible that we many not have the energy or the daring or we may not even live long enough to pursue our longings. If the heart beckons, and the spirit guides we have to gather courage to set our course into unchartered waters and let our goal be our guiding light. For the large majority though it is not what we do that is as challenging as how we do it. We would want to cleanse the corruption, take cudgels on behalf of environmental protection, be a social activist and empower society at large or simply live a straight and upright life. No sooner we attempt any of these we are immediately beset by a number of obstacles; the system will connive against you, the family would oppose your rigid and moralistic posture for it may bring more troubles than they want to face, society at large would see you as a rebel or trouble maker and you could also be threatened by vested interests who see you as an obstacle in their nefarious activities.

Remember : “He who defines duty for himself is his own master.” Dick Cheatham

Try these:

  1. Read the book Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Richard Bach. Read commentaries on it on the net and then summarize the learning.
  2. Work out a social service activity that you would pursue independently. This means that you will not engage your family, friends or colleagues in that activity. It could be as simple as donating blood every 3 months or it could be helping in the local school for the blind or volunteering at the pet care society.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

Be Yourself

To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life.   Baruch Spinoza

 We are always influenced by the environment around us particularly the human contact that is constantly there around us right from birth. Our behavior, manners, communication skills, education, thought process, attitudes, passions, dislikes are all molded by the circumstances and environment in which we grow up and are exposed to. Despite these influences, there is an individuality that is so unique to each person that try as much as we may to imitate others, we still cannot hide our individuality. Our voice, tone, choice of words, dress sense, eating habits, daily routine, beliefs, responses etc. are overwhelming our own though it may have shades of influence of others.

 Imitation is the best form of flattery for the person being imitated, but perhaps the worst style of individuality by those imitating. As individuals, we need to preserve and exhibit our individuality in order to stand out and be known for what we are. We often mistakenly believe that we are too insignificant to be of any importance. What we forget is that our individuality is what makes the world such a beautiful place for we contribute to it is rich diversity in physical form, display of our unique style, brighten up the staid lives with our creative inputs be it paintings, view points, song and dance or just our presence.  

 Our individuality also is the key to our potential. There is so much of potential within us which is often untapped and unutilized purely because we haven’t realized we have it in us and others haven’t been smart enough to discover it. Often there is no motivation for us to display our potential, frequently we are caught in the rut of treading the beaten path because of our inability to take risks and in most cases it is purely because we lack self belief. Our potential is not in making new discoveries or inventions, it is in doing even the most routine task in a better way, bringing to it your own touch or style.

 You can easily spot your inability to be yourself and your latent potential by doing a simple check; how critical are you of anything or anybody? The more critical you are indicates that you are observant, have so many ideas and have a wealth of alternatives to improve the present. What action you take after being critical decides how much of your potential you have realized. Mere criticism leads to frustration and even more critical attitude. Whereas, criticism followed up with your initiative and proactive contribution, would make you realize your potential. It would also open your eyes to the numerous variables and obstacles that impede your progress to excellence and would make you more action oriented and less critical. The thrill of doing a task well is the best reward anyone can get, for that is when your heart tells you that you have made the best use of your temperament, time and talents.

Remember: It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.  E.E. Cummings

 Try these:

  1.  Write down the following
    • 5 Criticisms about yourself
    • 5 criticisms about your work place
    • 5 criticisms about your boss/ colleagues
    • Now ask yourself if you have attempted to do something about the criticisms that you have observed. Have you tried to at least communicate politely to the others about your feelings? Have you tried to make some changes in you to ensure that you have addressed your personal criticism of yourself?
  2.  Now outline the following
    • 5 strengths about yourself
    • 5 strengths about your workplace
    • 5 strengths about your boss/ colleagues
    • Do you think some of these strengths far outweigh some of your criticisms? Can you leverage some of your strengths to overcome your weakness that you have criticized?
  3.  Revisit your New Year resolutions. Do you want to add some thing more in it in the light of the learning from the exercise above? Are there some resolutions that you would like to start working on immediately? Have you listed some activities that leverage your strengths as part o your New Year Resolution?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our weekly inspirational and motivational blog www.poweract.blogspot.com