Tag: Confidence

You can get what you want

7- Get what you want

Many of us are disheartened and disappointed in life because we believe that others are more blessed than us. We also view this as being unfair to us because in our view we are equally eligible for the largesse of life. The real issue however is the fact that we cannot pinpoint what we want. Most times what we want is what we suddenly envy in others who posses it. It is therefore essential that we clearly visualize, identify and decide what exactly we want for ourselves. This brings clarity to us, enables us to evaluate how we can attain it and most important ask and seek it. Yes getting what you want all begins with asking for what you want and this in turn means you begin by knowing what one want.

Ask – When we want something we need to ask for it if we are unable to get it on our own. The prerequisite for this step is to ensure we know what we want. It could be a material thing, it could be job or reference that you seek or it could even be exploring a relationship. Unless you ask others would either not be able to understand your want or they may not even notice your want or they would be so unsure about your requirements that they would prefer to be cautious and not even offer you anything. We do not ask for what we want because our ego won’t permit us to ask, we fear rejection of our request, we are embarrassed to ask or we are wary of the obligation that may come from those acceding to our request. Asking also has another dimension. Once we know what we want, it motivates us to ask ourselves for the required effort, commitment and perseverance to obtain what we seek.

Believe – If we ask we must believe that we are going to get what we sought. This is because we ask only when we are sure we know what we want and we are confident that by asking we can get it. Another reason to believe is the reality that we are then prepared to make best use of whatever we receive. A third reason to believe is the fact that if we are sure we will receive it we would be both cautious and reasonable in what we ask. At the same time don’t forget, that barring miracles and some lucky times, it would be silly to believe you would get anything that you don’t deserve. E.g. You don’t study and you pray for good marks or you have been rude and insolent to your parents and you ask them for something special and expensive for your birthday.

Receive If you ask with confidence and believe with full faith you must be ready to receive with arms open wide. You will receive in packages that defy logic, in a form that could surprise you and at times you least expect. Once you are prepared to receive all that you ask for and believe in keep looking for the arrival of the gift. Perhaps you are desperate for a job and you meet an influential person. That could be the beginning of you getting a job offer. At times when you are sure you deserve to get something and at the last moment it eludes you disappointment and frustration is logical. If you pause and reflect it maybe a hint of you having to expect more, work harder and receive a bigger reward. At times therefore, not receiving despite your conviction that you merit it, could suggest that you are to ask, believe and be prepared to receive something even more valuable and deserving.

Try this:

  1.  Can you recollect opportunities / prizes / awards that eluded you? On hindsight can you reflect on how that miss actually benefited you?
  2.  Attempt to do the following
  • Toss a coin 15 times and try to guess which way the coin will land face up.
  • Go to a basketball court and take 15 shots to score a 3 pointer basket.
  • Every morning list out at least 3 things that you will achieve before you retire to bed at night.
  • In the coming week listen carefully to people asking for something ( may be something tangible or seeking help ). Surprise at least one person by offering tangible help. Attempt to do this every week preferably for a stranger.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

 

Can you?

6 - Make this your mantraSelf doubt has stopped most people from attempting and achieving much more than what they already have. Each of us is blessed with potential that we often do not leverage simply because we succumb to our doubts, fears, anxieties and lethargy under the pretext that ‘maybe this is not my cup of tea’. We let our past, our negative imagination and the uncertainties of the future hijack our dreams, our potential and immense possibilities that lie ahead of us. Can we grapple with these and begin afresh with confidence? Of course you can! No matter whatever your age, whatever your financial or academic background, whatever your past, the future is there for everyone to make best use of. Identify what is holding you back and grapple with it first; your desire to attain something big will drive you to take on new challenges, work with tenacity and push you beyond your comfort zone and help you discover the real you.

Erase the memories of the painful past. Many of us tend to live in the past; either gloating in the adulation received in the past or often ruing the missed opportunities or simply cursing the bitter experiences one encountered. While gloating about past success can be a motivator living off those memories would be like sitting in a car with the engine only idling. One has to put in gear and press the accelerator to move. The bigger problem is those who sit in a car with a dead battery and instead of fixing the problem ponder, whine and blame the mechanic, the battery manufacturer and anyone else one can find to blame. The problem remains, you get frustrated and while you could have fixed the problem you still keep wondering Can I ?

Evaluate the potential that you are blessed with. We cannot be skilled in everything but for sure we are blessed with enough intelligence and common sense to find a solution to any problem. Either you solve it yourself or seek help. Ask yourself what can be done to meet the challenge of the moment. Merely giving up does not solve the problem nor does it do any credit to your potential. Take the case of a flat tire. Either you have the tools and the skills and the ability to change the flat tire or you go around seeking help. Of course some people would wait for help to come by way of a good Samaritan passing by offering help but that is a long, uncertain and possibly risky wait. Would you prefer to sit and wait instead of answering the question what Can I do now?

Eliminate erroneous perceptions of the future. Most of us approach the future with inhibition and trepidation. We imagine risks, worry about things not going as planned, are afraid to move from our present comfort zone, fear failure and embarrassment but most of all we do now want to take ownership of our own future. It is important to remember that it is essential that we make friends with our future for that is where we are heading as long as we are living. While the future is unpredictable with careful planning, a rational approach and decisive action the outcome of our actions can be largely predicted and controlled. All progress is made because people dared to imagine the future they wanted. You too can create a future that you want provided one does not perennially wonder Can I?

Embark on attaining your dreams – All of us indulge in careful planning but it is the decisive step of taking action that actually kicks of the plans. Planning a pleasure trip be it a picnic or an tour would entail a number of activities from dates to venue to budgets and most important the members participating. Many a time such plans do not fructify because there is no decisive action be taken for fear of opposition from vested interests like those who do not find the date, venue or budget suitable. It takes a decisive leader to take the hard decision to go ahead. When it comes to our own self we are as William Ernest Henleyw says in his poem ‘ Invictus’ I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul..       So why do you wonder Can I?

Try this:

Here are a few suggestions for you to mull over and attempt

  • List out 3 of your major fears. Choose one of them as the challenge for you to overcome in the next 3 months.
  • Do you have a pet project / social service interest which you haven’t yet been able to contribute to? Have a deadline and begin work on getting actively engaged in it.
  • Is there an activity or hobby that you are unable to pursue because of lack of time / energy / resources ? Attempt to enjoy the fun of that activity again.
  • Are there social issues on which you feel strongly? How about regularly writing a letter to the editor about it? The challenge is to get a letter published in the newspaper / magazine.
  • Are you trying to get rid of a bad habit or addiction or trying to improve on some aspects of your personality but not succeeding yet? Try again. Yes you can !

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

A New Year gift to myself

1 - 5 Jan 16 A new Year MessageSo you and I begin a New Year 2016 with a lot of hope, a bit of trepidation and tons of goodwill from many! What one needs to quickly realize though, is that it is MY life and only I can make it the best one I can. Ideally we hope this year will be a lot better than the one gone by. We ponder over our mistakes and regrets of the past, we mentally note down the yardstick of others that become our benchmark for success and we rush into life aiming to win; little realizing that we are competing only with ourselves and all we need to do is challenge ourselves to excel.

Let us pause and ponder over a few life lessons to enable us to journey with a purpose, with joy in the heart, exuding the fragrance of our unique personality and contributing to creating a better world around us.

Life is a journey not a destination – We subconsciously realize this because while we do have aspirations we rarely limit ourselves to merely realizing our aspirations. Once we attain what we aimed for we reset our aspirations higher. This is a good practice for it allows us to pace and realize our progress. Unfortunately, most times we are consciously chasing goals that are not pragmatically designed but developed with materialistic considerations in mind. We tend to believe that if we attain that destination happiness would be ours. Alas, in pursuit of those materialistic goals, we do not enjoy the joys of life, fail to appreciate the blessings we have and instead keep craving for more. The key to life is to make the most of what one has.

There are no mistakes just chances we have taken – You cannot cross a chasm in two steps; so when we come to the chasms in daily life we have to either jump or turn back. At times we misjudge the width of the chasm other times we mistimed our jump or we overestimate our ability or we were unprepared to take that leap; in all the above cases we would have failed to clear the chasm. We would also fail we did not believe in ourselves and turned away. The times we have cleared the chasm and the times we deliberately and consciously refused to take the chance only to realize later that it was the best decision you made, are the only times one succeeds. In daily life the chasms are invisible, the skills sets required opaque, the decision making has to be quick and continuous and the results may not always equal your expectations. You just have to keep taking those chances for some of them could be the giant leap that can propel you to a different level.

Make the most of the moment without wasting time on regrets – The worst mistake one can make is to go back in time and keep wallowing in the misery of the regrets we have, If only is a common enough refrain that suggests that things would have been different and life much better. We keep wondering about the possible outcome if the choices we made were different. A decision made a point in time can neither be reversed nor can the consequences be altered. Not doing anything is also a decision. The reality is that we cannot escape our responsibility nor stew in our regrets. What we can do and must do is make every moment count.

Life is not a competition but a mere challenge – Your life is a challenge for you to cope with and not a competition with the next person around you. Each of us is blessed with unique talents, abilities and capabilities. What we need to do is be aware of our strengths and ensure we utilize it to the full. We fail because we do not run our race but pace ourselves using the others around us as pacemakers. If you are a sprinter and follow a marathon runner, you are bound to fail. Similarly if you a middle distance runner and use a sprinter as the your benchmark failure is certain. Success come only when you get up and keep running no matter what. It helps to plan well, pace yourself as per your abilities and push yourself to your limits. The challenge in life is to run your own unique race well.

Make life fun as you get serious work done – Most people go through life as if on a life saving mission. Reality is that everyone has to earn his/ her living. So then why not make that living while enjoying it. True there are periods of stress and turbulence but they are far few and in between, Do we really make the best use of the rest of our time to ensure that we make our life fun, our living a joy and the world we live in a heaven on earth? Do we laugh enough, can we enjoy a relaxed environment, do we pause to smell the flowers, do we have time to stand and stare? Can I experience bliss every moment of my life?

Each new dawn gives us another opportunity – So what are you going to do with the opportunity? Would you size it or squander it? Begin today, begin now by jotting down your goals for the year. Jot down all the things that you believe will make you happy. Outline the action you would take to overcome your weakness. Commit yourself to some unique experiences that you hope to have during the course of the year. List out 3-5 friends who you would surprise this year with a unique gift. Gift yourself an expensive gift this year (write down what you really want). There is so much more that I can do each day.

Try this:

Fill in the following list for yourself

  • A unique musical program that you will attend this year
  • An animal / bird that you will sponsor this year at the local zoo
  • A new skill set that you would like to acquire
  • A place that you will visit from amongst the following ; a hospice / a prison / a mental asylum
  • Three changes you will bring in to your daily life to make your healthier/ wealthier/wiser
  • Five people with whom you have lost touch but would reconnect with this year
  • A fund raiser in which you would participate and the amount of funds you plan to raise.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

The past is a good reference

36-The past has its uses

As we come to the last week of the year, we normally tend to lapse into some nostalgia. While we do dwell on the good times of the past year, we also tend to linger longer on the ills that plagued us, the potential we could not fulfill, we rue the opportunities missed and often why fate was a wee bit cruel in general. The year end is a good time to reflect and dwell and commit to our learning the lessons of the past, but it is also the best time to wipe the slate clean and begin afresh.

So as we step into a New Year, it would help us look back to review the year gone by and make use of the learning from it as under:

Learn from our failures – Our immediate thoughts are often about the regrets we have for either having failed to accomplish what we set out to do or because we never got around to starting what we hoped we would or because we just did not visualize / size the opportunities around us. The good thing about failure is that we it grounds us to reality and reminds us of our mortality. The best thing about failure is that it allows us to steer clear of the mistakes we made and work out a better way to attain our goal.

Improve up on our successes – We do always cherish the sweet successes we tasted. Occasionally we tend to gloat over it and other times we feel smug that we managed what others couldn’t. Our successes should actually spur us to take on newer and bigger challenges, enthuse us to find better ways of attaining success in our predetermined tasks. Ideally we must focus on improving the yield, reducing the time, simplifying the task, automating where possible etc.

Update possibilities – Both success and failures offer us opportunities to discover new possibilities. It could be a technique, an improvement on the existing, leveraging the resources available to the full, discovering alternatives etc. Visualizing, being creative, being enterprising and risk taking are all means to the same end of creating possibilities.

Clean the slate and start anew – Whatever be your evaluation of the year gone by we can neither rest on our laurels nor can we wallow in our failures. The New Year is point in time when we can wipe our slate clean and begin anew. It is a good time to clear the cobwebs in our mind, reinforce positive thoughts for the coming year, get enthused to embark on a new venture or reinforce an existing one and translate thought into action.

Try these:

  1. Make a list of 5 pressing items / tasks that you are determined to complete in 2016 no matter what the impediments are.
  2. Make another list of 3 things that you will do to
  • Make sick and the lonely feel cheerful
  • Get involved in your favorite social service project
  • Increase your savings by 10 %
  • For protecting the environment or for animal welfare
  • Improve your health and fitness

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

                                                 www.poweract.blogpsot.com 

Your dreams have no expiry date

35 -Your dreams have no expiry dateIt is that time of the year when most of us subconsciously rewind the tape of our life with reference to the year gone by. We certainly do fondly recollect the good events and times, we may also painfully remember the hard times that passed us by. However, what we dwell on often are the numerous lost opportunities, the chances we did not take, the actions that we could have done differently and possibly got another outcome and the slow motion picture of the broken new year resolutions, the plans that never took off and the remorse of having wasted our time either because we didn’t get around to chasing our dream or because our dream didn’t materialize despite our best efforts.

It is easy to brood. Easier still is to give up on our dreams. So then we decide that making New Year Resolutions is a waste of time an exercise in futility or we rationalize that it is a silly custom or idea. If at all we get down to writing some resolutions we might resolutely decide not to add any of the previous year’s unfinished work since it brings back painful memories. That leaves us with broken dreams, unfulfilled hopes and a sense of regret and frustration. Fortunately time is a great healer. It is also a great leveler. Far more important is the fact that we are blessed with an imagination and can dream bigger and if we commit ourselves to realizing this dream you can do it. Dreams have no expiry date so no matter what age you are, no matter what the size of your dream, no matter what impediments you visualize along the way; if you write down your dream and commit it to it and start working on attaining it, you will wake up and live your dream.

Define and develop your dream – Having a wish or a hope is merely making castles in the air. To have a realistic dream one has to define it in terms of a tangible goal and develop it by outlining all the intermediate steps that one has to progress through before realizing the dream. The more vivid the dream the more purposeful and realistic it becomes for there is shape and structure that one can identify with. Doing well in an exam is too vague as compared to having an aim of scoring 80%. When the later is clearly defined, it is relatively more easy to outline the steps required to reach it.

Revise and reorganize your plans – While one must be largely rigid and hold fast to the dream one has, one must make allowances for changes around, unanticipated hiccups, a drastic change in the assumptions made and even revision forced by pragmatic considerations. While the goal is not to be diluted or changed the means to the goal could undergo a major metamorphosis. This is merely to ensure that one is realistic and in tune with the circumstances prevailing.

Expect and experience difficulties – Even the most well laid out plans may not go as expected. There will be delays, obstacles, confusion, differences of opinion, dilemmas to be resolved along the way. This is to be expected because life is never linear and we need to adapt to the flow. Experiences will prepare us better to meet bigger emergencies and also sometimes assist us in reframing our path or expanding our goal.

Act and attain progress – Paralysis by analysis is a common refrain. This happens because most times we try to ensure perfection in plans, little realizing that this is an oxymoron. The key to attaining anything in life is action. By initiating the action we begin our quest to glory. Action is painful, it requires effort, it needs sustainace and most of all it means commitment. As a couplet goes’ Sitting still and waiting makes no person great; the good lord sends the fishing, but you must dig the bait.

Make and meet success – Dreams are not realized by accident; they are to be made by dint of good planning, hard work and complete commitment. You meet your dreams not when asleep but when you awaken to the reality that you have built it. Even as you read this post many thoughts are swirling in your mind. Some may find the post inspirational, others mere shrug it off as one amon many such proclamations, others may have more to say and many would want the learning from the post to work for them. The question is ‘What are you going to do after reading this?’

Try these:

  • Make a list of last year’s New Year Resolutions that you never attempted or didn’t progress in any worthy manner. If you haven’t even made any resolutions last year make a list now.
  • Commit yourself to one social service resolution. Now work out a plan to ensure that you spend at least 20 days in a year in pursuit of that goal. If possible also outline what you expect to achieve when pursuing this goal, by the year end Dec 2016.
  • Is there a change you plan to bring about in your habits / mannerisms / style of functioning / relationships that you hope will make you an even better person? Outline the steps you propose to bring about this change in you.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

                www.poweract.blogspot.com

Get moving – keep progressing

33- Open the gates

How often do you wistfully think about the opportunities lost, the golden chance that you missed and rue your inability to be decisive and experience something different? We are largely creatures of habit and so we prefer to trod the beaten path, remain cocooned in our own little world and are apprehensive about exploring beyond. While our heart would want to take a chance our mind would normally override that urge by popping up imaginary risks and cautioning us against any misadventure, least we fail. Our real problem is not failure but the fear that we could be triggering trouble if we fail. We do not want to take the responsibility and so we remain mute spectators to the numerous opportunities that fate packages for us.

The trouble for many is 4 fold. Once a person can come to terms with these 4 limiting factors, the sky is the limit.

Recognizing the opportunity – This is the toughest part of setting yourself free from the confines of your mental and emotional prison. You can identify an opportunity only if you are seeking it. Many of us are afraid to dream, scared to think big, see lurking danger in being different and so just go along with the flow. Those whom we envy, are people who have dared to visualize something special for themselves and by focusing on that goal suddenly found themselves grasping the opportunity that they craved. Go on make a list of 10 things you always wanted to do or possess. Look at that list daily and notice how you suddenly seem to be noticing opportunities to attain that.

Inability to see the risk reward payoffs – The bigger the risk the larger the payoff. Of course conversely, the bigger the fall too. If we keep thinking about the failure, then you will attract it as you are not focusing on the opportunity but trying to insure yourself against failure. Once you can see the goal you have set for yourself, then it becomes easier for you to outline the roadmap to reach there. Without that roadmap, you will go around in circles. The payoff for bigger risks is the price you pay in terms of effort, sacrifices, stress, criticism and loneliness. If you trust yourself to reach the finish line then nothing can stop you and you will get that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. So will you now invest in buying a lottery ticket or taking part in a competition?

Being persistent – Quick results are the bane of those who begin a venture. Just like those who go gyming cannot get to see the result of their efforts within a week, risk takers who dare cannot expect to find success overnight. Persistence is the one quality that will lead to success. Continuous effort with faith in one’s goal and ability and the spirit to weather any storm are guideposts along the highway of success. There are times when you want to give up or question your own wisdom about continuing and yet if the little voice in your heart says don’t give up yet then give it your best shot daily. Look for the little progress to motivate you to keep pecking away like the woodpecker.

Knowing when to change tracks – There is a thin line between persistence and foolhardiness. This is perhaps even tougher to identify than finding one’s goal. It is easy to have lofty goals but very tough to recognize when the goal set is beyond your personal ability. Not all effort gets rewarded in proportion to the effort. Not all plans fructify the way one has envisioned. The ability to accept that the way ahead is not worth persisting with and the daring to cut one’s losses, takes a special sort of courage. It does not mean giving up but merely choosing a better alternative. Notice that when businesses merge, the also ran’s are not caving in to the market leader but merely acknowledging that it is the best time to cash out.

Unless you dare you cannot do; and unless you do you cannot win !

Try these:

Here are a few dares

  • Not accessing your email or mobile or social media for 48 hours
  • Singing a solo song in a foreign language at an office get together
  • Recording yourself mimicking 3 of your office colleagues and showing it to those colleagues
  • Surprising an office colleague with a an expensive gift on his /her birthday

Attempt to make some dramatic changes as under:

  • In your dressing style
  • In your communication style
  • In your personal space at work and home

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

                www.poweract.blogspot.com

Never mind the crack

7- 26 Mar 15-Never mind the cracksIt is rather ironic that today’s post offers hope; for a despondent nation is still trying to pick themselves up after their semi-final loss to Australia today, at the 2015 Cricket World cup. In fact the raging debate especially on TV channels is between those who believe we have been shattered and those who say that the defeat is a mere blip albeit a devastating one. So to begin with let us accept the fact that after a flawless undefeated run upto the semi-finals, we did get a nasty crack when playing a better team. Yet, while the margin of defeat, the manner of loss, the poor bowling, batting on display as well as the captaincy will be the subject of much debate the fact is that cricket will continue to be our most loved sport. More importantly, remember it was the same team that were totally outplayed in the Australian series that turned themselves around to have an unblemished run till the semi-finals; clearly proving that we can still mend the cracks and also crack the whip when we want to.

Each one of us would have at various times experienced failure. Most failures largely our own fault where we were tardy, disorganized or simply not prepared to succeed. However there could be times when failure hurt us deeply because it was unexpected, we felt humiliated or because we had prepared in all earnest to succeed. In almost all cases failure did not end our life, nor threatened our career or terminate our future. This clearly underscores an important characteristic of failure, that with very few exceptions, failure can only temporarily impact us. Overcoming failure is a matter of 4 simple steps

Believing in yourself – We throw in the towel when we stop believing that we are capable of achieving what we set out to do. This is primarily because we focus on our limitations and weakness rather than on our strengths and our passion. Each one of us can grow in our chosen field of endeavor, provided we nourish it with the right amount of effort, intellect and discipline. When we do get the results the first time, see it as an opportunity to prepare better and succeed.

Letting time be the healer – When we fail, we must avoid cracking up and seeing lack of success as an end to our aspirations. Do mull over the reasons but do not brood over it forever. Let by gones be by gones but never forget the lesson.

Fresh initiative and diligent effort – Time also gives us an opportunity to go back to the drawing board, come up with fresh strategies and relaunch a fresh attempt with a brighter chance of success. Leveraging our strengths, adding new arsenal to overcome our limitations and honing up skills as also find other means to neutralize our weakness are the key to succeeding.

Not giving up and also knowing when to give up. – Perhaps this is rather difficult to comprehend for there are two diametrically opposite suggestions. Try till you succeed is an old adage and frankly an excellent piece of advice to follow. So what if a crack appears, one can still stick the pieces together and get things functional. However what happens when the cracks are too many and too fragmented. Perhaps the only way out is to replace. Essentially it means that the outer frame is still sturdy, it has tremendous utility but it may require a fresh coat or it may need to be fixed with fresh glue. In investment parlance knowing when to give up is called ‘cutting one’s losses’.

You may lose a thousand battles but you can still win the war ! Don’t give up- don’t give in; just give it your best shot ! even it means having to take a decision to cut your losses.

Try these:

  1. List out 5 of your major failures. Think of atleast 3 reasons for your failure. Have those failures made you risk averse?
  2. Try all of the following. Attempt each of it atleast 3 times ( each succeeding attempt being at least 3 days apart)
  • Creating a drawing using any software
  • Playing a card game / board game / indoor game that you have never played before
  • Preparing a dish you have never cooked / attempted before
  • Doing something that you were mortally fearful / apprehensive of eg. Holding a reptile in your hand / participating in a public speaking contest etc.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

My wish for YOU for the New Year

13-32-My wish for the New Year 2014It has been 4 years since I first started writing this blog and it has been a roller coaster ride with both highs and lows. The slow but steady increase in number of posts(485 posts), number of views (over 1,97,000), number of followers (over 1050) and the encouraging feedback from blog readers have been real highs for me. The occasional confrontation with writer’s block, the challenge of keeping up with the standards set and the gaps in feedback or slow pace of views at times have been the lows. However, each of you reading this post and particularly the followers of the blog who get the posts in their email inbox deserve my special thanks for the support and encouragement I have derived because of them.

The post today is for each of you with my hearty wishes for the New Year 2014 and beyond.

Comfort – Each day is a new day with a fresh set of challenges, problems and opportunities. Don’t let go the opportunities but should you miss them don’t brood over it too much. On the other hand if troubles seem to shadow you may you take comfort in the realization that ‘ this too shall pass’.

Smiles – They say a SMILE is a curve that sets everything straight. Go on and smile away your blues, your temporary worries and your toughest challenges. A smile is the quickest way to reach to people and to reach into your own heart and feel blissful. (Click on this link to know more about how a SMILE can make a huge difference to you http://www.poweract.blogspot.in/2010/01/smile.html )

Rainbows – After a heavy downpour we are often fascinated by the sight of the majestic rainbow in all its splendid colors. It is also believed that there is proverbial pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. So wait and seek that rainbow when things don’t go the way you want it to; perhaps you will also find more than just the rainbow and get lucky with that pot of gold.

Laughter – Laugh and the world laughs with you. Bet each of you would love to have more company, plenty of friends and definitely hoping to have a rocking time. The secret to all that is being joyful and spreading good cheer and the quick fix is simply hearty laughter.

Sunsets – There is romantic tinge to sunsets and as you watch the slow sunset in the distant horizon, the physically darkness that follows actually allows you to experience the bliss of a happy ending and would leave you with a warm feeling of accomplishment.

Hugs – Be it a hearty greeting or a moment of heartfelt sympathy, both these extreme emotions are best expressed with a hug. The touch and intimacy convey far more meaning than anything that a wordsmith can conjure up.

Beauty – Far too often our eyes seem to be riveted on the misery, dirt and squalor around us. Alas there is also ample beauty around us that we take for granted be it the tapestry of religious, cultural and ethnic diversity  or the wonders of human evolution be it in the form of dressing, culinary art, physical art, prose and poetry. Nothing beats the beauty of the natural beauty around us be it the flora and fauna, the landscape, the creatures of the world or simply our own fellow human beings. Seek and you shall find – Beauty to warm your hearts and life your spirits.

Friendships – He / she is poor who is alone, friendless and unloved. Friendships are the outcome of a social need, a commonality of understanding and respect and is the essence of human evolution. Friendships nurture social interaction, evolution of communities and personal growth.

Faith – Faith overcomes fears; after all FAITH is Finding Answers In The Heart ( Click on this link to know more about FAITH http://www.poweract.blogspot.in/2010/01/faith.html )

Confidence – You are committed to whatever you do when you have the confidence in yourself and in what you do. Confidence comes from self belief, purpose and determination.

Courage – It takes courage to accept your faults, listen to your critics and to follow your heart. With courage you can only grow better, bigger and brighter.

Patience – If you have read so far, you are blessed with patience; a virtue that will open your eyes to the wonders of new revelations and fresh opportunities.

Love – It encompasses life in its entirety. First love yourself, warts and all. Next love those around you and finally love the world around you. Guess what? What goes around comes around and you will always be ensconced in LOVE

 Try this:

  1. Find out innovative ways of using the above blessings to cheer up a close friend, a total stranger, a person in another town/ country.
  2. Use the gifts of faith, confidence, courage and patience to explore a new hobby, a new exotic place and a new technology that you have been avoiding.
  3. Prepare any one of the following a New Year card / PPT/ collage / painting / poem incorporating the elements smile, rainbow, sunset and beauty.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Life from a different perspective

13-23-Life from a different perspective

Schooling has developed as a structured way of imparting knowledge in an organized, well paced and hopefully effective manner. Unfortunately traditional schooling has limited creativity, given undue importance to structure and form and made teachers, parents and students beholden to examinations, marks and competitive one upmanship.  The good part is that logical thinking has been well entrenched in students, the system attempts to give opportunities to excel for those who are academically inclined while providing ample scope for the less academically gifted to pass and progress.

However there were those who viewed traditional schooling from a different perspective. Those who found traditional schooling restrictive, too standardized and possibly too limiting for children with extra ordinary intellect, propounded the concept of home schooling.  Home schooling has emerged as an alternative but requires extraordinary vision of the parents as well as their whole hearted commitment. The concept of home schooling though has been a revolutionary departure from the traditional concept of schooling since it allows freedom to an extraordinary degree, reinforces the concept of self discipline in students and re defines the very style of teaching and learning. Above all it gives students the alternative to explore a wide range of subjects in the most practical way and to the full extent of their interest and capability.

Despite these apparent benefits of home schooling the concept is still very much in a nascent stage and that begs the question How does one explore different perspectives fruitfully? The answer lies in our ability to

Be open to change – Unless we have an open mind we would only accept what is available and if that does not suit us we would crib/ complaint/ criticize but never explore alternatives. Once we keep an open mind and seek solutions or alternatives various options would immediately come to the fore.

Appreciate the alternatives – Once we identify alternatives it is essential that we probe/ explore/ study and analyze these alternatives with the clear belief that one or more of these alternatives holds the key to what you are seeking. Of course there would be shades of grey in the alternatives, there could be doubts raised by well meaning people and some difficult to accept situations which we would have to overcome as inevitable. E.g. for most people suffering from asthma, where allopathic medicines continues to be ineffective an alternative that is often propounded is the live fish swallowing therapy that is available in Hyderabad. While the thought itself is repulsive for even non vegetarians, it could be terrifying for those who are vegetarians. Yet thousands flock to avail of the therapy simply because they are left with no alternative but to try it.

Let go the tried and tested – This is the bane of the vast majority. To prove the point let me suggest that you quickly try to draw /sketch your own portrait. Chances are that you would first attempt to draw you face, starting with a round outline followed by the eyes and mouth and nose etc. Notice how seasoned artistes approach the same drawing and you will appreciate that there are various alternatives.

Adopt and adapt the new possibilities – While we ideally try to find readymade solutions for our problems/ challenges the reality is that each solution could vary and may need to be adopted with changes or adapted to ensure the expected outcome. Almost all progress made in any field is largely an outcome of experimentation, trial and error as well as infusion of creative inputs.

See benefits however small – Anyone who tries to find a different perspective would find himself/ herself in a hopeless minority and would have a tough time fending off critics and experts who are unable to comprehend your logic/ thinking/ risk taking. The possibility of disillusionment and frustration then is best eliminated by focusing attention on any small outcome that gives a glimmer of hope. Perseverance and determination are traits that are essential for anyone who dares to walk the path less traveled by for it would be a lonely, strange, uncharted territory but holding the promise of immense possibilities.

Try this:

  1. Write down your 3 most serious worries. For each of it jot down 3 alternatives solutions that you can explore to eliminate/ solve/ minimize your worry.
  2. Out of the following alternatives try to attempt at least any two which you have never done before
  • Write a poem / limerick
  • Solve a cross word puzzle
  • Learn and perform a new card trick / magic
  • Learn to tie three different types of knots ( as the scouts do)
  • Write a movie / book review
  • Organize a theme party on your next birthday

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

In the midst of chaos find peace…

13-21-in the midst of storms

The universal truth is that life will always have up’s and downs. It is our ability to be grounded when we experience highs and cope with the frustrations of the lows in our life that plays a significant part in the success we achieve and more importantly the happiness we experience. Managing to be grounded when lady luck and success embrace us is relatively much more easier than battling the frustrations, the self doubts and the anger that follows failures, ill luck and negativity. The post today gives you insights into coping with those terrible moments that shake our belief in our own self, makes us feel victimized and sometimes push us to the brink of a chasm called depression, with suicidal thoughts not too far behind.

Be objective. Perhaps the most important cause of our frustrations is our inability to be objective about events/ happenings/ situations which we perceive to be detrimental to our interest or one that is a failure or something that we would desperately want to avoid. Objectivity comes out of being balanced, not being impulsive, avoiding panic and accepting the reality. E.g. You have carefully planned a holiday and everything is in place but alas on the day of travel the flight is cancelled. It is only objectivity that can bring sanity and some realistic solution.

See Positives When things don’t go as per our plans our disgust, annoyance and frustration see only the consequences never the possible positives. It is essential to be objective if one has to see the positives for often our judgment is clouded by our negative emotions. It is also possible that you have to think beyond the normal to connect the dots and see the positives. E.g. recently my flight was cancelled and while it did upset and annoy me, I knew I was short of time to take control of the situation. After prolonged discussions with the airline staff, they agreed to fly to me to an alternate destination and give me a connecting flight next morning. I did lose a day in the process but soon realized that the overnight stop over at the alternate destination gave me an opportunity to visit a friend and his family and offer my condolences in person on the loss of their son in a tragic accident.

Seek help. When flustered and irritated it often helps if one can vent it out or better still share it with a close friend or family. In the first place they help us let out steam and their words of comfort have a calming effect on us. Often they are much more objective in their responses and they would be able to suggest alternatives that would often escape us. E.g. When my flight was cancelled the airlines did not offer an accommodation and it was up to me to make my own arrangements. While I did try to evaluate options, I also rang up a close friend who often traveled to that city. In a jiffy he gave me the contact details of an excellent place close to the airport which was known only to a select few.

Don’t freeze. While meditation and slow breathing are the most popular ways to calm one’s self, the process particularly the former requires some skill set/ technique whilst the latter demands a fair bit of patience. Both techniques are effective but when pushed to the edge, the most effective technique in my view is action. Movement and activity will ensure your mind is distracted from the problem, if done with a purpose the activity will be focused on positive outcomes and for sure you will get an alternative solution. In some corporate offices there are punch me bags kept specifically to allow employees vent their frustrations by punching the bags. Even a walk in the park can be exceedingly helpful to calm nerves and maintain equilibrium. Ideally though diverting the mind to finding solutions and acting on the responses would give one a sense of purpose and bring one a step closer to finding a solution thus liberating the mind and body from the tensions they were subject to. E.g. When my flight was cancelled the airlines offered a full refund but by being calm I realized that it was perhaps the worst option for my objective was to reach the destination. Last minute tickets would cost me an arm and a leg and so I continued to engage the airlines to offer alternatives. Persistence and conscious engagement helped find a more acceptable solution as opposed to taking up their initial offer of full refund, which would neither solve my problem nor let me have peace of mind for quite a while.

I have deliberately used the same situation of  a missed flight  in each of the examples given above, so that readers can be sure that by and large the technique works in all crisis and chaotic situations.

Try this:

Apply the above 4 points to the following situations and find your own responses

  1. Your exam results have been announced and you are shocked to note that you have been declared  failed.
  2. You are all set to travel with your family and just 2 days before you are diagnosed with typhoid and strictly prohibited from travelling by your doctor.
  3. You are on a holiday and suddenly discover that your wallet is lost.
  4. You have had a serious showdown with your best friend and he/she has stopped all communication with you despite your best efforts to have a reconciliation.

How will you respond to the following crisis in your life.

  • You are to meet a very important client and the meeting has been scheduled after a lot of persistent effort on your part. Whilst on your way, you receive and urgent call from your close friend who requests you to rush to the hospital where your friends nephew has been admitted following an accident. Your friend is out of town and hence the request.
  • You have done excellent work during the year and each quarter you have been commended by the management during the quarterly reviews. You are sure you are in line for a promotion and a handsome increase in salary. You are shocked and confused when the management offers you a more than expected increment but declines you a justly deserved promotion. More shockingly you find out that a colleague has been give a promotion and you are convinced that you deserved the promotion more than the other person who was promoted.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com