Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘Decisions’

11- Being resourceful is the keyWhen confronted with a challenge, a problem, a dilemma, a threat, an obstacle or danger, chances are that we would furiously think of ways to mitigate the issue. This is normal human reaction for that is how we are psychologically conditioned to act.  The issue is actually what we do next. Many of us give up daring to execute our plans for fear of failure. Some would simply give up even trying to identify a solution rationalizing that the circumstance confronting us is far beyond our own ability to cope up with. There would be others who make half hearted attempts to at least postpone the inevitable, in the fond hope of the matter resolving itself over time. The circumstances confronting you are not your enemy. Being afraid to think and act is the real enemy.

Being resourceful is all about thinking quick and acting purposefully. In fact thinking quick is often a natural reaction. However, we tend to keep prejudging our thoughts, ideas, alternatives and opportunities thereby largely neutralizing the power of those immediate thoughts. Acting purposefully is a bigger challenge for we normally tend to react to circumstances rather than act with a clear plan in mind. So is resourcefulness just a matter of generating alternative solutions? Ideating and creativity are just one tool for being resourceful albeit a critical and important tool. Resourcefulness goes far beyond merely thinking up alternatives. It is setting up yourself to triumph over circumstances.

Here are some pointers to being resourceful and using them to overcome the obstacles that confront you.

Believe in yourself – The first thought that often comes to mind when confronted with a challenge is oh no. This is quickly followed by thoughts that revolve around Why me? Can I? This is terrible. I can’t cope with this. It is unfair. It is important to remember that every individual does face challenges at various times in varied degrees and the challenges cover a wide spectrum. One either copes with the challenge or gets overcome by the challenge. The first step to coping with a problem is to believe that you have the mental, physical and emotional strength to find a solution. Unless you believe in yourself you would not seek to find a solution.

Think/ ideate / be creative / visualize– Thinking holds the key to generating solutions. It could be logical or rational thinking, it could be creative thinking, it could be idea generation or it could be visualizing big and narrowing to specifics. There is a solution and I can find it must be the mantra. The solution could be completely off beat, it could be risky, it may require a tremendous leap of faith or it could be so very simple you start doubting its efficacy. Look at all the technological wonders around you and you would realize that each of them is a marvel in itself. More importantly each improvement is actually a solution to a problem that was worked out by someone who believed they could find a solution.

Create the right environment to act The toughest part of being resourceful is reassuring yourself constantly that you are capable, competent and clear about your resourcefulness paying off. Sometimes it would be the nagging doubts in your mind, other times it could be the nay sayers who discourage you, occasionally it would be those days when nothing seems to go right and mostly it would be the let me give up feeling that comes like waves of a nausea. To cope with this it is essential that you create the right environment. This includes simple things like ensuring you have the right tools to work with, the physical environment suits your temperament, you bounce ideas of people who will give you dispassionate and encouraging feedback, you brace yourself to dealing with failure, your tune your mind to find encouragement in the smallest success that you attain.

Act decisively to attain your objective – This the toughest part of being resourceful because this requires daring and is test of yourself belief. Just as one cannot cross a chasm in two steps, acting decisively means taking a giant leap of faith. The plans on the drawing board would remain just that, till they are translated into concrete action. There are no auspicious moments, no perfect time to begin. Making that commitment by beginning ensures that you will make those extra efforts to keep going. It is possible that you will be tempted to rethink, to reassess, to go back to the drawing board, to give up, to start differently but once you get the momentum it is a commitment that will linger and persist and draw you back to continue.

If at first you don’t succeed, start again. Very few have ever succeeded in their first attempt. However, it is those who didn’t give up their quest for success who ultimately triumph. Few plans pan out the way they are planned. There would be detours, there would be complications, there could be road blocks, there could be frustration and there will be discouragement. Keep your goal in mind. It must be sufficiently big enough to motivate but not so large that you are overawed by the challenge. Most importantly you must enjoy the journey. Be desperate, determined and driven; then you will be resourceful enough to see your dream come through no matter how long it takes or how many attempts it takes.

Try this:

  • Can you think of unique ways to celebrate your birthday or that of a close friend or family member?
  • During the coming week, check out the various cultural activities that will take place in your city and attend at least 2 such activities that you have never even been too. Identify 2 new things you learned in the process and find a way to implement it or utilize it.
  • From the various posts in your social media sites list out 5 posts that caught your imagination. Of these are there any that you think you can replicate or adapt to make the world around you a better place?
  • If you had the resources to start a social service initiative what would you start? How would your initiative be different from those existing? Even without the resources can you implement some of the unique ideas you have in mind?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »

13-30-Life has choices...what is yoursThe toughest part of life is taking decisions. Unfortunately all our life we will be constantly facing this dilemma because almost all the time we are blessed with choices and we have to decide what to choose. Remember the battle with the alarm every morning when it is time to wake up? Confused about what to have for breakfast / what to wear etc.? On hindsight, each one of them is a minor decision as compared to the major decisions you have to make regarding your career, your future, your savings, your life partner etc. Yet there is one decision that you need to make that would determine how you are perceived by the world at large and one that will decide your fundamental happiness; the decision to be yourself.

Being yourself seems to be the easiest thing to do but in reality it is very tough because

You seek acceptance of all what you do or say

You would ideally like to project a picture perfect picture of yourself

You would like to have an impact or influence on the people and the world around.

However it is possible to find greater acceptance of the person you are, project yourself in more favorable light and leave your footprints on the sands of time. What you need to do is groom yourself right, develop the right social skills and values systems, iron out your weaknesses and then when you project yourself it is a well rounded personality that comes to the fore.

Here are a couple of things that one must focus upon so as to comfortably be yourself and find acceptance by many and also touch many lives.

1. Cultivate good manners

2. Enhance your vocabulary and communication skills

3. Be truthful

4. Groom yourself well / dress appropriately

5. Learn to appreciate and compliment

6. Develop empathy

7. Control your temper

8. Keep calm no matter what the crisis

9. Be respectful no matter what the provocation

10. SMILE

Try this:

  • How would you want people to describe you after they have frequently interacted with you?
  • Name three people other than your family members who have had a profound impact on you?
  • If you were to be marooned on an island which person personally known to you would you prefer to be your companion on that island.
  • What is the one most endearing quality you seek in a person who you consider your friend.
  • If in a sudden crisis who is the person you would reach out to first ?
  • Your best friend is in serious trouble with the law. You are aware that he is guilty. How and what and when would you communicate with him/ her?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »

13-22-5 W's of life

Rudyard Kipling made the 5W’s and 1H famous through is immortal poem I Keep Six honest Serving men (http://allpoetry.com/poem/8444911-I-Keep-Six-Honest-Serving-Men-by-Rudyard_Kipling ) and today’s post is an interesting perspective on HOW our response to the 5W’s  holds the key to making our life unique, interesting, and fulfilling. The interpretation of the 5W’s from the perspective of our life is also very intriguing and thought provoking.

Who you are is what makes you special. Do not change for anyone.

Even identical twins have unique personality traits. It is the I in the individual that makes the individual unique, different and special. Of course our hereditary, the growing up environment, our elders, teachers, friends, experiences do influence and mould our individuality. There will be pressures from all around us, that would overtly and covertly influence us to adjust, make changes, confirm to and/ or  display our individuality differently from the real person we are.  Ultimately though, it is our thoughts, our beliefs, our values and our self esteem that will determine our individuality. How we cope with the influences  and pressures of the world around us will determine how true we remain to the unique individual that we are born as.  

What lies ahead will always be a mystery. Do not be afraid to explore.

Each day will bring both surprises and occasionally challenges. However, most days will be routine, staid and boring. While surprises would be a pleasant diversion, challenges can bring quite a bit of stress and yet provide motivation to find solutions. It is the daily grind of the routine, the staid fare called work and monotony that is almost omnipresent that is a huge challenge for the vast majority. Breaking this viciously cycle would be possible only if one is prepared to explore alternatives and create, discover, invent options. It could be as simple as changing the routine style of work, the work place, the approach to work etc. It could be made more exciting and challenging by finding new methods, adopting new styles and reorganizing the existing paradigm. E.g. Compared to the gym routine adopted and followed a few years ago, modern gyms have varied equipment, a variety of exercises, different styles of exercising, have introduced and stressed on diet routines and diet supplements all of these focused on getting more people to get interested and involved.  How do you plan to explore the opportunities around you to make what lies ahead exciting.

When life pushes you over, you push it back.

Have you ever experienced a phase in your life when nothing seems to be going right? Perhaps you have had to endure the pain of facing sudden calamity just when everything seemed so perfect. These are times when life mimics a game of passing the parcel, where you cannot avoid the parcel but don’t know when the music will stop and worse still what forfeit is hidden. The best thing to do is to enjoy the game and play it in the true spirit of the game. Remember the saying then going gets tough the tough get going! How do you plan to get tough, more daring and more resilient coping with and overcoming the vagaries of life?

When there are choices to make, make the one you won’t regret.

When there are choices aplenty, exercising a choice is a challenge especially when the alternatives are equally attractive. Many a time choices are made based on perceived pay offs and unfortunately many a payoff has a subtle hint of either a crooked way or a selfish intent or border on the illegitimate, indecent, illegal or irresponsible. The focus of the payoff should be the long term good that is aligned with the values and beliefs we hold dear to us. The payoff should also not compromise on our self respect, our long term vision and never ever for paltry short term gains. How you analyze, evaluate and decide would help make the choice but what really holds the key to making choices is your upbringing, values system and self belief.

Why things happen will never be certain. Take it in your stride and move forward.

Every action in our life is largely directed at being happy. However most times we realize that despite our best efforts the results are far from happy. There are times when things seem to slip from our grasp at the last moment; other times we don’t seem to see any tangible evidence of happiness even remotely in the distant horizon and then when we get a whiff of happiness it is never ever enough or long lasting. Our patience is tested, our frustrations cold turn to despair, platitudes and endearments no longer hold out hope and yet that is when we must regroup our thoughts, recharge our energies and resolve to begin afresh with faith, hope and anticipation. How quickly you put the past behind, plan for the future ahead and take those strides forward will determine how far we attain our life purpose and self fulfillment.

Try this:

  • Jot down 5- 10 qualities/ attributes / traits/ talents / characteristics that make you a very special person.  Identify also 2-5 personality/ behavioral traits that others find annoying/ irritating in you.
  • Jot down 5 activities/ places/ experiences that you would like to explore over the next 3 months.
  • What are the two decisions that you are still dithering over? Identify reasons for you not being able to make the decision and work on overcoming them.
  • If you were given1 minute to write down your will, would you be able to do it? If your answer is YES write it down now. If your answer is NO, then why are you wasting time – go and prepare your will. Are you sure you will be alive the next minute?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »

For the past couple of months, well meaning friends and acquaintances have been politely inquiring as to why I have not been writing my blogs as frequently as before. I suspect a number of my blog followers and readers also have a similar query. The plain and simple fact is that I chose to cut down on writing these blogs partly because my priorities changed, partly due to perceptible lack of motivation but mainly due to an unfortunate combination of travel, fatigue and spells of laziness. However, choosing a topic to write on perhaps was the biggest challenge and the real issue that has proved to be the biggest stumbling block in my quest to positively influence my readers through his blog. I have chosen to put these facts before you, for you have been loyal readers and you are entitled, in my view, to be updated of the facts.

The theme for today is something that is both a challenge to embrace and an inducement hard to refuse. I chose it precisely for this intriguing dichotomy.

I choose

to live by choice, not by chance by being aware of the options, appreciating the consequences of my decisions and by consciously improving my chances of success by wisely exercising my choices. Remember: Chance favors the prepared man

to make changes, not excuses by using my intelligence, my creativity, my powers of visualization and all my abilities to influence and impact my life and environment around me. Remember: Instead of cursing the darkness light a lamp

to be motivated and not be manipulated by finding big and small reasons to enjoy what I have to do, by experiencing the joy of a job well done and by doing things right on time without having to be pushed, coerced or threatened. Remember: We cannot be pushed from behind or pulled from the front; we have to be driven from within.

 to be useful and not used by volunteering to lighten another’s burden, by standing up for what is right by not being cowed down by another’s authority or power and by utilizing ones talents and abilities for the larger good of society at large. Remember: It is better to wear out than rust out.

to excel not compete by preparation and decisive action, by treading the path of integrity and honesty and shunning the urge to display one-upmanship. Remember: Excellence is achieved by competing with yourself.

to choose self esteem and not self pity by learning to live within my means, by appreciating the blessings I am showered with by not envying another or feeling sorry for what I lack. Remember: “To wish you were someone else is to waste the person you are.”

to listen to my inner voice and not the random opinion of others by imbibing the qualities of fair play, truth, justice and independence of thought and action. To respect the opinion of others without being unduly influenced by them and having the courage of conviction to stand by what I am sure is the path of righteousness. Remember: To sing like the birds sing, not worrying about who hears or what they think.

Try this:

  1. Out of the above list out the toughest point that you find hard to choose and implement. Outline reasons for it. Think of ways and means that would enable you to cope with that challenge if and when you have to face it.
  2. List out the most common criticisms about yourself which are expressed by those close to you. Which of those criticisms are valid? How do you propose to tackle those criticisms?
  3. If you are to hold one of the following 3 pairs of insects /animals in your hands for 5 minutes which pair would you choose and why? (none of them belong to a poisonous or dangerous species)
  • A frog and a lizard
  • A cockroach and a spider
  • A snake and a mouse

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »

Decision making, perhaps ranks first in the list of toughest skills to master and when the issue on hand is subjective one needs nerves of steel to be decisive. The process of decision making can be broadly categorized into two – objective decision making or impulsive decision making. Objective decision making can again follow two different approaches – deciding by eliminating the untenable or choosing the most favored option. Even impulsive decision making can be an outcome of gut feeling, irrational exuberance, illogical elimination or a random pick which is an outcome of a systematic process of elimination using an external aid be it tossing the coin, drawing straws or picking up a chit or lottery. Despite having such a wide variety of methods to make a decision, there are times when the logical thinking clashes with one’s sixth sense or the situation demands that a fair method be adopted to give a fair chance to two opposing sides to make a choice (e.g. choosing which team would bat first in a cricket match) . A way out of such predicaments then would be to flip a coin and…

… as the coin is suspended in the air on its trajectory upward and on its spiral downward one has to quickly choose between heads or tails and assign a decision to the choice. The outcome then is completely random. However in exercising your choice, you have given in to the choice that has an edge in the deepest recess of your heart. The outcome of the flip of the coin then is purely a matter of chance and yet there is a sense of contentment in that decision. E.g.  The captain of a team has to decide what course of action he/ she will take on winning a toss. If the toss is lost, the decision on what to do is forced by the coin.

Action Points:

  1. On what basis would you choose 4 cards at random from a deck of shuffled cards?
  2. What other alternatives can you think of to replace flipping a coin?
  3. Your mother wants to watch the final episode of a TV serial. Unfortunately at the same time there is the finals of your favorite sport. To compound matters, a close elderly relative is unexpectedly coming over and he/ she does not have any interest in TV and is more likely to spend time in meditation which requires peace and quite. How will you attempt to tackle this situation?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »

Life is like a coin.  You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once.  ~Lillian Dickson

For many, life is like a coin that we can toss and then tell ourselves Heads you win, Tails I lose. With an attitude like that, whatever the outcome thereafter, life will be a burden for one has reconciled to a fate of misery. Pause for a moment and see each day as a gift of a coin given by fate with no strings attached and we are free to use it any which way we want; suddenly life becomes more meaningful and delightful. Just as we can use the coin to buy an ice-cream, put it in a mite box, get a gift for a friend or family member or simply save it, life too offers us ample choices and it for us to make the best use of it.

For the average person, the 24 hours that we are gifted each day, can be broadly utilized in 3 different ways, each of approximately 8 hours each; sleep, work, personal time. It is not just we utilize the time that matters but also how and why we chose to utilize our time that has  major bearing on making that ONE precious coin we have called LIFE,  count. Just to explain further, at this point I have a choice to enjoy a favorite TV show or choose to write this blog. While I have chosen to write the blog, I am sure I would have no regrets about watching my favorite TV show, but then my blog would not get updated and that is something I may regret.

Managing our life has always posed a problem for 3 reasons. We do not know what we want from it, we are not prepared to pay a price for the things we sometimes know we want and there are too many distractions that compel us to abandon our well planned intentions. Obviously if we can try and come to grips with these 3 problems, there is a very high probability that we would find life exciting and exhilarating.

To understand what we want from life, click on this following link to a post that I have recently uploaded.  https://actspot.wordpress.com/2011/09/07/discovering-the-real-you

To tackle the problem of minimizing the distractions and taking decisions that can help us make our life more meaningful click on the following link that again I have uploaded recently https://actspot.wordpress.com/2011/09/22/decisions-shape-destiny-go-on-make-up-your-mind

The bigger problem still remains, that of reconciling to paying a price for whatever we want from life. It is essential to remember that barring some really blessed people, the overwhelming majority of people have to always choose between two equally pleasurable alternatives or equally damning alternatives and the moment they choose they have paid a price of wondering if they have let go of the better alternative. Many a student can identify with this when an exciting live match clashes with the study time for an important exam. There is a simple rule to decide on what is the price one pays and that is choose the alternative that in the long run you will never regret. Failing an exam for example, could set you back by a year and that is something that you may regret lifelong but missing out on the match of a century would be a regret that you can overcome partly by seeing replays and partly by the realization that the price you paid was worth it when you do well in the exams. Remember that was the rule that I applied when writing this blog and each of the blogs during 2010 when I wrote almost every day. Yes I sacrificed a lot of my time that I could have enjoyed but then I would not have had so many posts uploaded.

If you re-read the first line of the first para, you would notice that there is a also a significant factor that influences how we lead our life and that is our attitude. If we can simply rewrite the first line to read ‘For many, life is like a coin that we can toss and then tell ourselves Heads I win, Tails I don’t  lose’ every day will be a series of small and big victories, victories nevertheless.

Remember: I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world.  This makes it hard to plan the day.  ~Elwyn Brooks White

Try this:

  1. Make a list of the 5 things you have done that you regret the most. If you can, also analyze why you regret those actions and how you would have handled the situation differently.
  2. Outline 2 social service causes that you are very interested in. How have you got involved in it? What more can you do to contribute to that cause? Do you think you are giving enough of your time and talent to the cause?
  3. How would you decide on and what alternative would you choose, in the following situations.
  • You have not prepared too well for your exam. However you are confident of getting reasonable marks in the exam. On attempting the paper you realize that there is a very real possibility of failing unless you can answer at least one of the mathematical questions correctly. The person sitting near you is a good friend and a class topper and there is a good chance of copying from his paper. What will you do?
  • You are invited by your best friend for his bachelor’s party. You realize that on the same date and time, you have to attend your boss’s sons wedding in another city. What will you do?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

 www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »

It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped.  Tony Robbins

Of all the numerous faults that one can be accused of, being indecisive is one of the most serious faults for it makes a person fearful, confused, inept and paralyzed, thereby losing out on opportunities to progress, be productive and attain success. The sports arena illustrates this best when an indecisive player becomes a bane for the team and the game by poor coordination and shoddy performance. Ever noticed the mispasses on the field, wayward shooting at the goal and the back chatting between team members; many of these are symptomatic of the malaise of poor decision making. In real life, anyone who often echoes his/ her concern of being confused can be quickly identified as someone prone to avoid taking a decision. Sadly, very often many of these people become indecisive not because they lack inputs but because there are too many equally attractive options or equally scary consequences and deciding on any one is challenging.

Here are four pointers to help one become an effective decision maker.

Analyze extensively but don’t get paralyzed by it. Paralysis by analysis is the bane of those who believe in extensive study in order to minimize the chances of failure. Most people would profess to study threadbare the situation that needs a decision so as to be able to make the best decision, but subconsciously many of them are trying to find the best way to hedge their decision should it fail. As a result making it fail safe becomes the focus rather than maximizing success. When risk appears we tend to demonize it and consequently vacillate between alternatives until forced into a decision either by time constraints or other external pressures.

Accept the reality that not all decisions will be right. Human nature comprehends failure to indicate ineffectiveness, incompetence and ineptness, faults which in our myopic opinion grievously devalue us in the eyes of others. The reality is that failure is proof that someone dared, someone miscalculated and that there could be alternatives to the path taken. How many were actually ruined by the mistakes made? Barring some who were foolhardy or blinded by a false sense of invincibility, every other person who failed learnt from those failures and bounced back with better decisive strategies.

Be aware of the consequences of taking the decision and also of not taking the decision. By being indecisive and avoiding making a commitment, the chances are that we are risking not grasping opportunities, perhaps even missing out on minimizing / avoiding failure and certainly ensuring that the original issue remains unresolved. .  Ask anyone who has invested in shares and stocks and chances are you will get more stories of failures in stock picking but probe further and then they will accept that they rue being indecisive. Many others will blame their impulsiveness in taking decisions that led to poor stock selection.

Never forget that it is only when you can bite the bullet that you can lead the charge. Every leader has invariably reached the top by getting bruised and battered in the battle field of life. What has set them apart is not just their doggedness and ability but their ability to take crucial decisions at critical junctures. At times their decisions could have backfired and send them hurtling down the steep slope of success but with renewed vigor and enthusiasm they took the decision to battle their way up.

Remember : Some people, however long their experience or strong their intellect, are temperamentally incapable of reaching firm decisions. James Callaghan

Try this:

  1. Play a game of snakes and ladders but here is the twist to make you be aware of decision making. Every time you roll the dice you have a choice to accept the number that comes up or to pass the move except if the number that is thrown up moves your counter to a slot with a snake, in which case you go down to the tail of the snake. Check how and when you make the ‘decision’ to pass your turn .Are there times you felt you made a mistake because you made the decision ‘to pass your turn or not to pass your turn’?
  2. Take a look at the video by one of the more popular lecturers at Harvard, Prof. Michael Sandel who is taking a module on the Moral Side of Murder. Remember to pause the video after he asks the first set of questions and make it a point to make ‘your DECISION’ to the question he asks. Also ensure you are clear why you made that decision.  Then continue the video till he asks the second set of questions based on a scenario he describes. Again pause the video and make a decision based on the question.  Perhaps a different facet of ‘decision making’ will emerge and challenge you. Click here to view the video http://tinyurl.com/yey37oe

 This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Inspirational and Motivational Blog

www.poweract.blogspot.com

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »