Tag: Friendship

Kinship

Acceptance is the truest kinship with humanity. G.K. Chesterton

Kinship is relationship and while we would like to believe that we have no personal biases when it comes to interacting with people, and that all of humanity is one, ask your conscience if it is really so. We may not make out preferences apparent, but check if the name of a person / the person’s religion / region/ language/ education/ color/ physical looks, conjure a stereo type in our minds? What happens when the person either confirms or does not confirm to that image? Strangely enough, either which way, we reserve judgment about accepting the person as he / she is!

If the person confirms to our image, we are smug in the knowledge that our hypothesis was right but we might hesitate to accept that person for either of the following two reasons. One is that we don’t like the image of the person and / or we want more proof that the image portrayed is really the right personality. If the person does not confirm to our original hypothesis a similar dilemma confronts us, for we wonder if it is a put on act by the other person or we doubt our own ability to judge. The key learning is that we take time to accept people and form a kinship with them.

There is nothing wrong in taking time to form kinship, because it is a self protective mechanism to ensure that we don’t fall prey to charmers, smooth talkers, wily and cunning people. At the same time our propensity to be suspicious, wary and treating everyone as a scoundrel unless proved otherwise is a major barrier to healthy communication, forging close bonds and embracing the other warts and all. At stake is the way we treat people; is it dignified, unbiased, proactive and warm. Do we respect their individuality; make allowances for the varied differences of culture, creed, caste, religion, education, economic disparity etc. Can we accept the differences, appreciate their uniqueness, and reconcile to the fact that despite all that we are part of one big family called the human race? If you can say a resounding YES, then we are accepting others whole heartedly and forming a kinship with them and that is what Humanity is all about.

Remember: Serve others for they are reflections of the same Entity of which you are yourself another reflection. No one of you has any authenticity, except in reference to the Original. Feel always kinship with all creation.” Sri Sathya Sai Baba

Try these:

  1. Make an effort to visit a prison or a mental asylum and spent a few hours with the inmates there. What are your feelings when you go there? Is there fear within you? Do you look at them with trepidation and anxiety? Do you feel sorry for them? What can you do to make them feel less like outcasts and more wanted?
  2. If you have a servant or help coming home have you tried to find out more about them and their families? Can you do a bit to ensure that their children get some education and dignity in society? Can you suggest them ways and means to improve their economic status? Can you help them get better jobs?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Weekly Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

New Friendships

“Every person is a new door to a different world.”

Unless we have an exceptionally open mind, our perceptions would often influence our ability to accept people the way they are. Obviously when we get acquainted with a new person, the first impression we get, very often has a disproportionate bearing on how we interact with the person and the type of relationship we are likely to develop. While some people look very loud in their appearance and dress sense, others look too scholarly and reserved;  others look dumb and pretty while a few others have a plain jane look but have an intellectual air around them. The permutations and combinations are countless and that is the reason we forge friendships with some and wonder how some people ever have friends.

Irrespective of whether we form strong bonds with people or not, an interaction with a new person always opens the door to our heart and mind wide, to a wide variety of influences be it in the terms of culture, language, profession, religion, experiences etc. In effect, our interactions open the doors to a different world than the one we are used to or comfortable with. The new scenery may not be necessarily appealing but it is also possible that we get to see things that we never imagined. The beauty of life in its myriad splendors is revealed to us, through the our interactions with new people.

Sometimes, behind the gregarious bubbly and lively personality we discover a very lonely, sad and bitter person who seeks to be understood but limits themselves to superficial relationships. Others who seem hardened and tough reveal a childlike innocence when we get to know them better. There could be others with a petite demur, calm in temperament, cool as a cucumber but deep inside they are scheming, crooked and cunning. There will me many who are warm, full of life and genuine and yet we may not be comfortable with them simply because we envy them. Anyone new whom we meet will be different; do we make the effort to try to open the door to them and explore the world they can lead us to?

Remember: Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down

Try these:

  1. The next time you go for a social event or party, make it a point to meet 3-5 new people (at least one of whom should be of the opposite sex) who you haven’t known before. The challenge is to know more about their family, hobby and dislikes. Also assess how you would rate the person on a friendship scale of 1 -10 with 10 being the person would be excellent to have as a friend.
  2. Check the profile of your friends. How many of them come from a different religious, cultural, language background? Do you have any single parent, divorcee, widow/ widower, amongst your friends. Do you have friends who have an age gap of over 7 years or more between you and them? Do you have friends who are in completely different professions than your own like fashion photographers, journalists, animal activists, research scientists, professional musicians, an undertaker etc. Do you think you can befriend someone with such a background in the next 3 months?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our Weekly Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

Friendship

True friendship comes when silence between two people is comfortable. Dave Tyson Gentry

Some of our best friends are those with whom we share a close rapport but not necessarily have much in common. They could be of varied backgrounds – educational, financial, religious, temperaments etc. What is interesting is that the friendship is based on a camaraderie that is hard to define, a chemistry too complex to understand and a relationship of trust.

When we examine our own friends circle we would be hard pressed to explain how or why the friendship developed. We might even discover that there is very divergent views held by us on almost everything and yet we are comfortable in the company of each other. There is an understanding of mutual admiration, carefree acceptance and an inherent trust none of which can be pinpointed or expressed in words. There are many friends whom we might lose touch with because of geographical distances and yet when we meet the spark of the friendship is ignited immediately.  The best friends are those who can sense your moods and  needs and without a word being spoken put you at ease.

Remember :”The only way to have a friend is to be one.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Try these:

List out what you have in common with your best friend.

  • List out the traits/ habits/actions of the same best friend that you dislike
  • Do a how well do I know my friend test by answering the following
  • His / her favorite color, dream holiday location, pet passion etc. Check with them later and you can ask them to do the same for you too.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also welcome to visit www.poweract.blogspot.com for another set of inspirational and motivational quotes