Tag: Judgmental

Our purpose in life could be unique

Our purpose in life could be unique

Often friends and acquaintances have asked me what motivates me to write this blog. The quote today in many ways, aptly sums up the key motivation for me to write. I think, my writing and sharing matters to those who read it, especially those who have chosen to follow my blog and get the blog feed in their inbox. It is my belief, that I do make a difference, to many of those who read my blog. I am sure the same feeling is what drives others, be they artists, caregivers, teachers or volunteers to spend time pursuing what they do. For most a job is a job but for those driven to make a difference the value of their effort is never measured in numbers.

While engaging in what you do is at the core of how we inspire, ignite and spark the flame, what really makes the difference are the following:

Being passionate – Your passion and zeal are what generates the energy and motivation in those around you. Notice how a passionate teacher, a enthusiastic co-worker or a diligent boss energizes you do achieve the impossible. Go about your activities with enthusiasm, excitement and energy- you can be sure you will transmit it to those around. They will draw inspiration from you and that will ignite the spirit of enthusiasm in others.

Setting an example – Walking the talk is what sets the example for others to believe in and follow. It could be simple actions like carrying your own cloth bag or helping a challenged person cross the street or acknowledging someone who has done you a small favor. Being attentive to people who are talking to you, smiling when meeting a stranger on the subway or hotel lobby, being respectful to the waiter serving you are simple ways of setting an example especially to those who look up to you for the right values.

Encouraging – Everyone who falters on the first attempt tends to get discouraged. When they continuously slip they become despondent. They require encouragement. A clap, a word of encouragement, a wave of the hand in appreciation, a thumbs up, a pat on the back are little ways to fire up an individual. Next time you notice a first time speaker floundering, give him/ her a nod and a smile to indicate that they are doing good and just need to keep at it. It will make a difference to their performance. Have you realized how we encourage babies taking their first steps? We are more excited to see them making their first walk of faith. Yet, later we are the same people who do not share their passion for things they find amazing but those that do not meet our standards of sensibilities.

Listening – Have you ever noticed people, especially young kids talking in excitement? All they need is someone to listen to. Unfortunately most adults give them a casual hearing and often react with suggestions far removed from the tale the youngster is sharing. The simple act of listening and then responding with words of appreciation, encouragement and enthusiasm is what sparks and ignites the spirit of excellence in them.

Being non judgmental Many a time what others do may my complexly out of sync with our own tastes or sensibilities. However, we must suspend judgment and never react with our own views and thoughts. At times it takes time for us to understand the other person, many a time we cannot visualize what they can see and far too often we are too conservative to appreciate the risks others take. The best way to ensure the others are pepped up and given a nudge is by being non judgmental and being open minded to ideas, views, actions that may faze us temporarily. You may not really encourage because you cannot understand but do not discourage because you fail to understand the other person.

Try these:         

  • List out the three qualities of those people who have inspired you. Ensure one of them is a former teacher and if you have work experience, identify a former boss or colleague.
  • What is the one quality in you that others appreciate? Do you utilize that enough to inspire and enthuse those around you? What more can you do to fire the spark in people, especially children and youngsters?
  • Think of two instances where it was the example or encouragement of someone else that helped you reinvent yourself and achieve whatever you are proud of.

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

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No friend is perfect

Who seeks a faultless friend remains friendless. Turkish proverb

The greatest treasure a person can have apart from a loving family is the presence of  an intimate friend / s. Almost all of us are fortunate to have the luxury of a friend with whom we can be free, frank and forthright. Yet, there are many times when wished that our friend/s would not have certain qualities or mannerisms or vices or oddities that we dislike, despise and abhor. From time to time we could also get a feeling of being suffocated by the friends well intentioned but unwelcome attempts at demonstrating his/ her affection for us and /or inquisitiveness/ bluntness/ rigid stand etc. Despite these varied irritants, we value our friendship and passionately believe we can count on our friends when the chips are down or morale low or if we need their wise counsel.

While we are very clear in our mind that every person comes with a set of his/ her own unique mannerisms and characteristics, we gravitate towards those whom we are comfortable with, those who share some common sentiments with us and people with whom we can relate too even if they have sharply different views. In many friendships there might be very little commonality between friends and they might have very divergent backgrounds/ views ( for example friends from diverse ethnic/ religious/ cultural backgrounds) yet the bond remains because of the comfort that they share. Many good friends happily take a dig at each other’s oddities, quirks and idiosyncrasies without the slightest damage to their relationship and intimacy.

It is the odd ball who goes around with a magnifying glass, analyzing the faults of people who ends up being a very lonely soul. Obviously human nature being what it is, no one is perfect and every has  his/ her faults and it is virtually impossible to find an individual without blemish. The truly friendless person is one who seeks perfection in a friend and sadly keeps searching, hoping to meet an angel. There could be some people who have angelic qualities and will attempt to befriend the lonely soul but then a human in angel form will never be able to live down the earthling within… and the poor soul who is friendless remains so for he / she won’t accept any blemish …not even from an angel.

Remember: “A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.”

Try this:

  1. List out 3 friends and ask yourself if you can tell each of them 2 of their worst faults without alienating them or losing their friendship.
  2. Examine a couple of friendships that you developed in school days that have not endured today. Can you analyze what contributed to the going apart over the years? Was it the yawning physical distance or the chasm of ideological differences or the pressures of expectations from one another that could never be met or was it because of a serious misunderstanding or difference of opinion?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com