Perhaps you too like many, have made some excellent New Year resolutions. However, like the vast majority, you too could already be feeling the pressure of sticking to the resolutions set. It is quite possible that we have already defaulted on a few already and are feeling a tinge of guilt about it. Our problems stem from our inability to take responsibility and own the challenges that we have set for ourselves. It all starts with us making excuses for any aberration that we are guilty of. We blame circumstances, others around us and occasionally our own ineptitude. We rarely resolve to overcome the circumstances or to ignore those who knowingly or unknowingly derail our plans. Worst of all, we accept our ineptitude as a character flaw that cannot be corrected.
If we simply pay more attention to correcting our personal flaws, the resultant benefits would be mind-boggling. The first step is to stop complaining. Complains are akin to a carpenter blaming his tools instead of working on enhancing his skills. While at times one may face trying circumstances and daunting challenges, these are the times when one has to dig deep into one’s reserves and find that extra something to overcome the challenge.
Worrying, whining and crying are common traits displayed by failures. These are excuses masquerading in varied forms that paralyze an individual from taking some proactive steps. In reality they do bigger damage in that the individual neither seeks help nor helps himself/ herself and instead they let circumstances dominate their future. Day dreaming is a more pleasurable way of circumventing reality. The pleasure lasts just as long as the dream and then the individual comes crashing down with a real thud. Day dreaming is a passive way to while away one’s time creating an illusion of success to be achieved in the future. Neither success nor the future materialize the way it appears in day dreams.
The way ahead is to be determined, disciplined and dispassionate. Be determined that you are going to achieve your goals / New Year resolution/ targets set. Wake up each morning with the goal in mind. Let the pursuit of the goal never slip out of your mind. Go to bed with thoughts of the progress made towards achieving your goals. Discipline is following the specific steps outlined to attain your goal. No excuses for not following the steps must be your mantra. If required sacrifice other pleasures just to ensure you have the time to follow the steps outlined. To keep nay sayers and critics at bay you need to be dispassionate and not let emotions and fears cloud your goal. Listen to those who have your welfare at heart. Listen to criticism. However, you must learn to ignore what does not suit your plans because only you can visualize the goal and success you have set for yourself.
- Make a list of the most common excuses you are guilty of making. Your goal is to ensure you eliminate or at least minimize the use of these excuses in the coming days.
- Outline three reasons why you have not actively pursued a latent passion. Jot down three action points that will help you pursue your passion starting this coming week. Ensure you don’t use excuses to not begin work on your passion or discontinue it soon after beginning it.
- What are the qualities of a person you admire that you will like to adopt? Begin work on imbibing those qualities starting now.
This post is courtesy www.actspot.com
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It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness. Chinese proverb
As we go through life each of us will face our shares of troubles and challenges. How we respond to these hiccups in life has a major bearing on how our future pans out. Most of us will attempt to put on a brave front and tackle issues sometimes successfully occasionally failing and feeling despondent. A few of us will, at the first signs of our inability to cope up seek help from others. Some of us resign to our fate and simply give up and surrender to our fate. What is common to all these approaches is that our initial reaction is to get annoyed, irritated and frustrated that the smooth flow of our life is disturbed.
Fate hands us many pleasant surprises and a few shocks too. When faced with a some of these unexpected shocks the easiest reaction and the most common is one of absolute helplessness and frustration. The next step in this line of thinking is searching for a convenient event, person or things to put blame on and deflect attention from our own inadequacies. If for example we have been careless and lose our wallet in a crowded train we will quickly abuse the poor policing system, the overcrowded trains, the growth and mushrooming of undesirable elements in society and of course the administration in general. Only the really balanced person would attempt to study our own culpability in the event.
The balanced person takes a more calm and realistic approach first pinning blame on self for not taking adequate precautions and for being negligent. They would view the tragedy as a wakeup call to be more careful and aware instead of the normal reaction of panic and over reaction. Through this approach they reorient their thinking to focus on getting results rather than apportion blame. Blame merely transfers the responsibility without any serious attempt to rectify the situation. Instead of blaming one would achieve more by making attempts to fix the problem and taking steps to mitigate a recurrence. In the long run this is what each of us wants ; plugging the problem firmly and avoiding recurrence.
To ensure that one has the right cure for the disease it is important that one identify the problem correctly. This is to be followed by scanning the environment for appropriate solutions. Sometimes the solutions may be cumbersome to implement, resisted by certain sections for selfish reasons and may become too bureaucratic to implement. Yet one must be prepared to swallow the bitter pill. More than anything else one must be proactive and willing to shoulder the responsibility to overcome the problem with standard solutions or if forced to search out creative options. We must be passionate about overcoming the problem and if possible implement a long term solution.
Remember: “There is not enough darkness in all the world to put out the light of even one small candle” Robert Alden
- The next time you don’t get rail tickets for a long term travel what kind of approach will you take? Jot down all that you will do to light the candle ( reach the destination) than curse the railways.
- As a dutiful citizen of this country you would definitely be concerned about some of the ills that plague this nation. Eg Rampant poverty/ growing population etc. List out at least 5 such problems. Now what steps will you take to make a positive impact to solve each of these problems ?
This post is courtesy www.actspot.com
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