Tag: Worries

Making your life simple

“Simplicity is making the journey of this life with just baggage enough.”  Charles Dudley Warner

Are you one of those who is forever complaining, someone who is constantly stressed, a person who never seems to have enough and an individual in the quest of his / her individuality? Our source of dissatisfaction, restlessness and irritation can be stymied and possibly got rid off by learning to avoid complicating our thinking and by focusing on simplifying our living. How do we complicate our thinking? How can we simplify our living? The answers to these questions are the essence of today’s post.

How do we complicate our thinking?

Comparisons. A common human bane is our invariable impulsive need to compare with others. Be it our own physical personality or mental abilities or wealth and riches; the urge to surpass the other creates in us need to compare and this leads us to warped thinking, skewed logic and insatiable wants.

Desires. Coveting what catches our fancy is perhaps a logical extension of our sin of comparison. However this goes deeper in as much as we pay no attention to our need but cave into our greed and lust and this blinds us to the consequences or price of our actions.

Jealousy.  Our insatiable urge for things manifests itself in desires whilst our ego is largely responsible for inability to restrain ourselves from comparing with those around. Alas, the combination of these two evils sparks of a third bigger evil jealousy. Jealousy unfortunately has no antidote and the best way to stem the rot is by learning to appreciate  all that we posses.

Lack of appreciation. By failing to acknowledge all that we are blessed with, we tend to take things for granted. If you have sprained any part of your body or you have had a hand or leg in cast you would understand how much we have taken our physical body for granted. Do we really appreciate the blessings of a loving family the power we have in the form of an intimate friends circle or the blessings of good health?

How can we simplify our living?

Acceptance: We have to make the best use of the cards that have been given us in this life. The first step then is to accept the reality and then begin to make the best of what we have. What we really need to watch out for are excuses that we spew out when we fail to grasp the opportunities that come our way. Acceptance is no license either to stop striving for one can steadily progress by aiming higher.

Be grateful : If you are reading this just be grateful for your education, your eyesight, the fortune of being able to access the computer and for the good fortune of coming across this site. Perhaps there are many more things to be grateful for. In reality do we value all the triumphs, the trails, the pain and the pleasure that we have experienced. The trails and pains are invaluable experiences that teach us a lot while the pain and the pleasure makes our life more fulfilling.

Enjoy the moment: Far too often we plan, strategize, anticipate, imagine and visualize in order to protect our future. Alas in this scramble to enjoy the future we miss out on relishing the present, the reality of now and the ecstasy of living. While it is essential to also think of the future that must never be at the cost of not having a great laugh, indulging in some tomfoolery caressing a loved one or enjoying the affectation of loved ones.

Worry less: The one thing that we overlook when trying to simplify life is minimizing stress. Stress is nothing but worry working overtime and overtaking our happiness. The way to minimize worry is by assessing the source and the consequence and then reconcile to it. This requires a lot of grit to confront the problem and a healthy dose of positivity to appreciate the worst case scenario. Worrying won’t solve problems but by minimizing our worrying we will have peace of mind, clarity of thought and ample time to enjoy the moment.

Remember: “In character, in manner, in style, in all things, the supreme excellence is simplicity.”  Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Try this:

  1. Out of the 4 points listed in the first part of this write up  and  the 4 points listed in the second part which 2 are u most guilty of violating?
  2. Think of one person who annoys you a lot. Now list out 2 things you admire in him/ her.
  3. Think of 2 things that worry you a lot. Now list out 3 reasons for each which you believe makes the worry less irksome.
  4. Name one person who gives you positive feedback and compliments. How often have you appreciated him/her? Have you tried to emulate him/her?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our  Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com

Why Worry ?

Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow. Swedish proverb

The trouble with worry is that we tend to magnify it and treat them as calamities waiting to happen or disasters that have knocked the wind out of our sails. The old English phrase ‘Making a mountain of a mole hill ‘aptly describes human nature when confronted with trouble. True there are varying degrees of trouble that we come upon daily but it is also true that almost all our troubles subside at some point in time or get solved over time. Yet our tendency to view most troubles as tragedies in the making, threatens us with emotional upheaval and personal trauma.

Coping with worry is very tricky. To understand how tricky and troublesome it is , just try walking with a tiny pebble in your shoe. The size of the pebble is not the problem but it constantly irritates and hurts us and worse still you cannot figure out where it will poke us next. Imagine worry as a similar pebble in your mind. While one can identify and remove a physical pebble, worries will always keep niggling you and it is near impossible to eradicate it from our thoughts and life. Ever imagined seeing a red elephant? Now try to forget that red elephant. You can’t because now that imprint has percolated your thoughts and will be there for quite a while.

Most times our worries are self inflicted. It is stupid not to study and then worry about exams. Similarly it is idiotic to pick a quarrel with ones boss and then worry about his/ her reaction to it. Other times our tardiness, sloppiness, casualness, laziness etc. are responsible for missed deadlines, shoddy work, indiscipline etc. and then it is pointless worrying over the consequences. In such cases we need to change. Other times worries are circumstance specific. An unexpected event, be it missing a flight or misunderstanding in communication could lead to worries. These worries hurt us more because we are not responsible for it but we are responsible for solving it. Here we tend to lapse into a ‘poor me’ syndrome and worry more about how to shield ourselves from the problem than in attempting to overcome the problem.

So do we have to live with worries always? Now that you have identified how the seeds of worry are planted and what happens with growing worries and how they crop up of and on in our thought process, we need to focus our attention on how to minimize or mitigate its impact. Most times we try not to think too much on what worries us and instead divert our mind from it unfortunately realizing very late that the worry remains almost imprinted. The first step therefore is to look at the worry rationally and note the worst case scenario. Once we know the worst case scenario we are reasonably sure things can’t get worse and then we can go about strategizing how to mitigate the worry. E.g. We have the tendency to delay conveying bad news to our seniors or the authorities and we constantly worry about their reactions. Once we visualize the worst case situation, we need to convey the bad news appropriately and at the earliest.

Never let worries bloat up like a balloon and look bigger than what it really is.  A deft prick will deflate the worry balloon and make it more manageable and less scary. It also help sot know that no worry is just one persons alone; there will be many others to share that burden too.

Remember: “Worry is the darkroom in which negatives are developed”

Try this:

  1. List out names of 2-3 people who you think are constantly worrying. Observe their words and communication content. They will be always complaining and blaming. How do you think they can change and ensure that they enjoy life more? Can you gently give them some hints on those lines?
  2. Make a list of things that you regret. E.g I should have studied harder and got better marks or I should not have fought with my girlfriend/ boyfriend and broken off.  Do those regrets still worry you? You can change the past but you can learn from them so how will you see those regrets positively and leverage them to improve yourself?

This post is courtesy www.actspot.com

You are also invited to visit our WEEKLY Inspirational and Motivational Blog www.poweract.blogspot.com